getting stoned. how often, and why?

[native]

I'll go months and months without it, but still desire it. I've never had regular access to it though. So am I addicted? Or do I just desire to thoroughly explore the catalyst available to me through it...

Again, it's useful and can provide insights, but for me and many others it eventually had nothing left to provide. It's said to not be physically addictive, but mentally. Anyone who smokes regularly or has a circle of friends that do, knows that it's something that they look forward to..it's on the mind often. That signifies an attachment. People are addicted to many things..soda, coffee etc. I see nothing wrong with irregular use, but personally I even had to stop that. The experience began going in the opposite direction..I could feel separation in others, felt very insecure, I would become paranoid about things I said or did recently.