My story...

[MichaelD]

Before I tell my story, perhaps an introduction is in order. My name is Michael, and I've been observing these forums for awhile, taking what I needed from the posts of all the beautiful souls which post them here. I decided its time to contribute to the very bright and inspiring aura I feel when I visit this forum.

My story of awakening begins, as with SO many, with a venture into the conspiracy aspect of the world. It began when my ex showed me a video by the wonderful Peter Joseph, "Zeitgeist". At the end, I wasn't really surprised, as it made sense to me from what I had already experienced in life. What did surprise me, was when I found out how deep the rabbit hole goes: Monsanto, base on mars, human made UFOs, propaganda.

However, even though it surprised me, I was never fearful of it. In fact, my whole life I've always had this feeling inside of me, as if everything is going to be all right. I've always just known that this world we perceive is vastly more complex then we could ever imagine. I've sat down many a night and told myself that if this life is indeed all there is in the universe, if all of creation arranged itself like this just so that I can get a job I hate, buy a house I don't need and squirt out a baby or 2, then I should just end it right now because that's not the universe I want to be a part of. Regardless, in these dark hours there was always a reassuring deep within my soul, a warmness, that always reminded me that indeed the universe is infinitely complex.

My next stop was cannabis. I began smoking after years of pondering the conspiracy theories (read, facts), realizing when I was a senior in college that nobody will tell me what I can and cannot do with my own time. Cannabis allowed me to have an open mind, and additionally the free time to sit down and watch a documentary. I usually watch solely documentaries when smoking. Also, later in life I discovered the art of using cannabis in conjunction with meditation, allowing this mystical plant to take me on the journey it wished to.

One night me and a friend were having a very deep conversation after we had smoked. At one point, my friend © had a bit of a revelation. So big in fact, he couldn't really convey it to me. He essentially described a portion of the Ra material. Neither of us had EVER even heard of the LOO. He asked me to imagine I was an infinite being and through infinity had discovered all forms of knowledge. What was there left to do? He said that the creator, having known everything there is to know, needed something. Therefore, he split himself up into infinitely many parts so that he could have infinitely many experiences of knowing himself. He could know what it feels like to lose someone, what it feels like to be a couch resting on the floor, or what it feels like to be an atom of Cesium in the center of a star going supernova.

Needless to say, my friend was blowing my mind. I didn't believe a word of it, and acted a devils advocate countering with "scientific" knowledge. Even so, he always defended it and held the idea ever tighter even as I challenged his belief. Soon after I got home, I watched a documentary and oddly enough David Wilcocks 2012 movie was somehow in my watch later playlist on YouTube. So I checked it out, and 3 days later I had read all of the Ra material and my entire world was in harmony. I can't really explain how I felt while reading the Ra material, other than a deep connection to it. Almost as if I was remembering it rather then reading it.

A year later, and now I've just graduated college and have never been more at peace in life. I finally understand why I've always had trouble as a child. I've never had that many friends, but the few I have had have been very dear to me. The concept of homelessness never made sense to me. Ive always felt I am here to give everything for other people. After all, if we live in infinity, Why does it matter what car we drive in this world?

Now I know, whatever I am doing, the important thing is I am always BEing. No matter what I am doing, I now understand it is exactly what I should be doing. I try to live life now as a beacon of light to remind others of the light within themselves. As long as I can be happy and in tune with the allness that is oneness, I am doing what I came here to do.

Even so, I still have some questions. I recently graduated with a degree in Mechanical Engineering. Now though, I realize that's not what I want to do. I always wanted to help people with science to make their lives easier, but now I realize I want to help people with love to make their lives fuller. And when I consider that people have already invented the energy to take ships to other star systems in mere hours, it's obvious the worlds problems are being caused on purpose. Also, I frequently feel as if I'm too late, as the Harvest is near.

I feel a desire to move. I feel a connection to the Colorado area, but I'm not sure why. Where I live, I feel like I have to guard my beliefs. Many people when they hear these conspiracy and UFO talk and LOO talk, they feel like it's their responsibility to keep this information down and judge it. So I feel like I have to protect my beliefs and not make them known to everyone. I feel as if I am surrounded by people who neither understand nor care too. I love them all, every single one of them, anyway; however, It's frustrating to know so much about the way the world is (beliefs and facts) and see soo many people stumbling in darkness.

I KNOW I'm not alone. It would be impossible for me to ever be alone. I frequently meditate on the togetherness of everything and am always brought to tears by the love I feel from everything, even myself. Nevertheless, it is so easy for me to forget sometimes and feel soo alone. I feel like I want people around me with similar ideas, but then who would I be helping?...

Now I am at a point where the last 6 years in school have brought me debt along with outdated engineering knowledge from the 40s. Funny aside, the first day I begin paying my student loans back is on December 21, 2012. Guess I won't ever have to pay those back (maybe...)

There isn't really anything I want for myself anymore. I know I have everything. I guess if I could have anything it would be a small piece of land for a small community where we would grow our own everything and spend time together in love.

I don't know if I am a wanderer, but I am awake finally. This was/is my story. As always, take what you need and leave the rest behind. Please offer any guidance you feel inclined to. I desire your comments.

[111]

Your resonance is sound my friend, and thank you so much for sharing!! You said you are always BEing, and I can't tell you how often I have said this to friends lately. The very beingness of creation is the engine that drives the wheels of eternity... AdonaiNamaste444

[Patrick]

Welcome to your full awakening my friend.

[kycahi]

Welcome, Michael. You are one of us for sure. I studied electrical engineering, and that helped me do well for awhile, but now I think about love and the One and our connectedness. Don Elkins learned mechanical engineering and taught it and Physics, before he went full time into the Ra material.

Stick around, lurk and contribute as you choose. We're glad you are here.

[norral]

welcome brother, thanks for sharing your beautiful thoughts. trust your intuition my dear brother it seems to be doing a pretty good job of leading you in the right direction

norral

[Lycen]

Welcome Michael,

Thank you for sharing you're beautiful story so far. I felt a little envious at part, the words you share have a radiance which is so kind, makin me self-reflect. I am thankful for that as well .)

I perceive similar thought's as my self, so I share ,D
Trust you're intuition seems to be working for you as I believe it has/is for me. I resonate with the thought of being a beacon for others, thus I have embraced the thought. "We need just be ourselves, in doing that we fulfill our purpose." Where ever being ourselves takes us, that's where we ought to be

Love and light sis

[Shin'Ar]

Hello to you Michael,

I am firstly curious as to what it is that you found in the Ra Material that you would say was the most profound in settling your stress with the world. Can you point to a specific topic or issue that you would say 'won you over'?

When you say that 'you are awake', what has been awakened in you?

You said, "I KNOW I'm not alone. It would be impossible for me to ever be alone. I frequently meditate on the togetherness of everything and am always brought to tears by the love I feel from everything, even myself. Nevertheless, it is so easy for me to forget sometimes and feel soo alone. I feel like I want people around me with similar ideas, but then who would I be helping?..." UNQUOTE

You capitalize the KNOW, as in you 'definitely' know that you are not alone, and yet, you say that when you forget you feel so alone.

So two questions here.

HOW do you KNOW?

and

WHAT do you forget?


I have shared with fields like yours in the past and what you sense is the result of a long disconnect from the experience of fields of your age. You must try to realize the path that your evolution has been taking so that you can discover where and why that disconnect has been so prolonged.

Where have you been? What have you been doing that has so separated you? I don't know if any of the others can sense this or not but there is something very unique about you, I want to say strange, because unique is not the word I should be using, but I do not want to sound insulting. So forgive me, I do not mean to insult, but I have to use the word they want me to use. Strange. Out of the norm somehow.

Have you ever had a past life reading done?

[MichaelD]

Thank you all for your kind words and welcomes. Indeed Patrick, I feel as if I have so much more to awaken to in the grand scheme. Waking up was just a stepping stone, as I have so much more to experience and learn from.

Thank you for you very uplifting comments, Lycen. My intuition has served me oh so well in the past, so I look to it for guidance whenever I feel lost, as it has never left me astray.

Shin'Ar, the most profound thing in the Ra material to me was indeed the title, "The Law of One." Specifically, Ra's emphasis on the absolute simultaneity of everything really moved me. While I can never fully understand time in that manner while in this body, the fraction I can understand is very profound to me. Infinity is so hard to grasp, but through the Law of One, I came to a greater understanding of it. Indeed every time I look at the stars (now, and as a child), I imagine the infinite amount of beings just like me doing the same thing all over the universe.

When I say, "I am awake", I mean I have awakened that inside of me that has been sleeping for, oh so long. The compassion, the love, the empathy, the altruism, everything. Everything that has been suppressed over the last 23 years of my life, mainly through school. What I mean when I say I am now awake, I mean that I now understand the feelings I have had all my life. I have always felt as if everything will be all right, but I now understand WHY everything will be all right. I have always felt deep love for everyone else, but now I understand why I feel that. I have become more of an observer of my life now, as opposed to always reacting. I speak much less to friends and family, but my words carry much more meaning. Sometimes I just want to hang out with friends and bath in their light/love with them, barely speaking at all, but enjoying the bliss of their presence. I haven't been sad since I have understood the Ra material. Everytime fear comes along, I observe it instead of reacting to it. I try to not shut it out, but instead use it to display my level of balance. This is what I mean when I say, "I am awake."

How do I know I am not alone? Firstly, from the Ra material I "remembered" that all things are one. In fact everything I can and will ever experience, is only myself. I even really knew this before Ra, because of the experiments done on quantum entanglement. Indeed, every proton, of every atom, of every molecule is interconnected over infinite distances as shown in quantum mechanics. While scientists don't take this to the next step, I know that this discovery means all things are connected. When combined with the knowledge that everything is conscious, I know I am never alone. I know everything is conscious just from experience. I can feel the life from Earth when I walk on it. I can feel the joy of the sand running through my fingers, allowing me to experience myself in this way and me allowing the sand to experience itself in this way.

What do I forget? Sometimes I get caught up in the everyday things. I am a fairly sensitive person. It doesn't take much from someone to cut me down, even though I am getting better and better at understanding why these things happen and using them as a catalyst. Sometimes it throws me off, how my best friend in the world will defend his illusion (provided by propaganda) to the point of chastising me for even thinking outside the box. The illusion for most people is so strong, and I sometimes get caught up in it, filling me with fear sometimes and causing me to forget the oneness. However, I am getting better at using this catalyst as a tool for growth rather than a limitation.

I am unsure what is you mean by the term, "field" in your second to last paragraph. Could you clear up my confusion?

I don't know where I have been. I have never had a profound out of body experience or anything like that, only just a feeling inside. Very subtle. Worry not, Shin'Ar, I know you mean no insult. These forums are a loving place, serving as teach/learn experiences, so say what you will. If you would, could you describe this strangeness you feel about me? Indeed, throughout life I have always been strange to nearly everyone, even my best friends.

I have never had a past life reading done. How would one go about doing this? Also, you said, "but I have to use the word they want me to use." Who is this they you mention?

Shin'Ar, thank you for your kind words and questions. I enjoy this discourse, and have indeed learned much about myself while searching for the answers to your questions.

Take care friends,
Michael

[AnthroHeart]

I too Michael rarely speak, if I can avoid it. Words create ripples in the Field I have found, and I'd much rather build telepathy if I were able to do that. I am happy when I can minimize distortion, depending on the situation. The Field for me is the infinitely dense permeation of space and time. We are in third density of the Field here.

What you speak of everything being connected reminds me of the fractal nature of the Universe. I'm sure there are lots of fractal videos on YouTube if you're curious about seeing them in action. The most famous of these are the Mandelbrot sets.

I am a very sensitive individual. Law of One I find teaches that wanderers from higher densities tend to be sensitive. That's sort of my interpretation of it, following other channel's works, including Matthew Ward, and his Tell Me About Heaven book.

[Ankh]

Thank you sharing, my brother....

I can feel the joy of the sand running through my fingers, allowing me to experience myself in this way and me allowing the sand to experience itself in this way.

*smiling*.... I used to do it with the mud....

[Steppingfeet]

I recently graduated with a degree in Mechanical Engineering. Now though, I realize that's not what I want to do. I always wanted to help people with science to make their lives easier, but now I realize I want to help people with love to make their lives fuller.

That, Michael, is beautiful. Made my day. : )

I guess if I could have anything it would be a small piece of land for a small community where we would grow our own everything and spend time together in love.

A book called "The Starseed Transmissions", which focuses on that process the Law of One might call Harvest, indicates that light centers are forming/will form around the globe, and around those various centers will gather like-minded groups during this process of great transition.

Whether true or not, I yearn for this type of land-centric community with overtones of spirituality and hippie-living.

Also, I frequently feel as if I'm too late, as the Harvest is near.

From a metaphysical perspective, you are right on time! As Ra mentions in 52.9
, "The overriding reason for the offering of these Brothers and Sisters of Sorrow in incarnative states is the possibility of aiding other-selves by the lightening of the planetary consciousness distortions and the probability of offering catalyst to other-selves which will increase the harvest."

Your very existence here on Earth IS service, and the more you open your heart to unconditional love, the more deeply you know your self, the more you remove fear from your vision, the more powerfully (and effortlessly) you radiate an essence or vibration that literally lightens the metaphysical darkness.

Even if Harvest began and ended on a Wednesday, and you arrived on a Tuesday, your presence would be of aid, in my opinion.

Where I live, I feel like I have to guard my beliefs. Many people when they hear these conspiracy and UFO talk and LOO talk, they feel like it's their responsibility to keep this information down and judge it. So I feel like I have to protect my beliefs and not make them known to everyone. I feel as if I am surrounded by people who neither understand nor care too.

By the sound of it... I speculate that where you live is on a remote, backward island called planet Earth. Am I correct?

Yeah, this is the case for most of us. Learning the art of discernment - that is, exercising skill in selecting what to share, when to share it, and with whom to share - is an essential tool upon the spiritual path in general, and specifically for those studying information supposedly from former Venusians.

When encountering those who do not understand and often care not to understand, I've learned to speak about the essential universal principles of the path without getting into the specifics and the jargon. There are infinite ways to love/accept another, to encourage and empower them without talking about fourth density, or UFO's, or even the evils of the corporate world.

In my understanding, your truest, most effective representation of your self isn't in accurately conveying your spiritual belief system, but rather happens effortlessly through your radiation of being. Your basic energy signature being a manifestation, you might say, of your depth of realization of oneness with the Creator.

Anywho, welcome, Michael! And thanks for sharing your wanderer story.

Love/Light, GLB

[Patrick]

...A book called "The Starseed Transmissions", which focuses on that process the Law of One might call Harvest, indicates that light centers are forming/will form around the globe, and around those various centers will gather like-minded groups during this process of great transition.

Whether true or not, I yearn for this type of land-centric community with overtones of spirituality and hippie-living. ...

You are so perfectly right. I can feel this too. If nothing happens this year, I will probably have to seek such a place or create one. In fact I don't really know why I'm waiting. I must be too lazy still.

[Steppingfeet]

You are so perfectly right. I can feel this too. If nothing happens this year, I will probably have to seek such a place or create one. In fact I don't really know why I'm waiting. I must be too lazy still.

Hey Patrick, a lot of us I think feel much the same way. There is a strong undercurrent for community within the wandering soul.

I know that when i read about or see depicted a type of community that is closely associated with nature and natural processes, works together as a group for the common welfare of all its members, eats, lives, and dies in a somewhat communal manner, walks on the Earth with bare feet, and together celebrates events like harvest of the crops and equinoxes/solstices, etc., I feel a pang in my heart, like something is gravely missing from my life.

I'm sure I'm romanticizing some elements of indigenous life, but it's appeal nevertheless remains strong. I actually left the theater bummed after watching the movie "Avatar" because for some reason it hit a similar cord inside of me, the place where I feel a lost sense of community.

Hope these thoughts are desired in your thread, Michael! No intention to derail, just wanted to respond to Patrick, and it seemed pertinent to your own thoughts. GLB

[darklight]

A couple of years ago, I suddenly woke up out of my sleep and than happened something strange. It was like I was another person and at that moment it was hard for me to understand who was that guy here lying in bed, who is this man, who is that strange person and what I'm doing here with him? I happened a few times for at most 20 sec or so. Do u guys ever had simular situations?

[MichaelD]

You are all very kind and have wise/heartfelt things to say. It makes me very happy to know there are so many similar to myself.

I too am drawn to Native American culture, along with most other tribal cultures. They remember what most of the world has forgotten. Avatar hit a similar note with me.

That sounds like an interesting occurrence Darklight. I cant recall a similar experience that I've had.

Namaste

[Shin'Ar]

Michael,

Is it right to say that the Ra Material seems to have enhanced your harmony with humanity?

This long sleep that you speak of, and this sudden awakening to your human bond and the aspects of love and celebration of humanity seem to be conjoined in some way. The long sleep suggests that for a long period you have been out of sorts with humanity where once before that you were not.

I am struggling with that 'connection' here.