08-05-2009, 12:29 AM
Hello,
I have just finished reading the book “Going Deeper” by Jean-Claude Gerard Koven and he offers some “suggested explorations” hence my visit to your website.
With an open heart I wish to share my awakening with you.
This is a copy of the email I sent to my psychologist after the experience (Although all I felt was a love that I had never experienced before I still thought “well off to the mental home I am going”........Enjoy
Yes and many ‘things’ have happened since, I am ‘hanging’ in there and continuing on my journey of discovery
It is with wonderful delight that I write this email to you.
After many months of reading, hiding, talking, crying, journal entry, discussions, a visit to a clairvoyant, many visits to many web sites, attempts at ego control, sleeplessness, anger, counseling, meditation, astro travel, yoga, vegetarian diet, bewilderment, confusion, doubt, lack of belief and blame my spiritual awaking occurred on Saturday the 14th March 2009 in the mid afternoon. I was born, I had no past, I had no memory, my past was deleted, just wonderful.
I wish to thank you now, truly, for the first time. Thank you.
I now see clearly all of my existence in God and the existence of God in me. You are a very special part of my life and all of the times we met I received all of your love without even knowing it, just wonderful.
(Some of the words that I wrote in my journal were: “I am an organism, the universe is an organism, I am part of the universe and the universe is a part of me, God is a part of me I am a part of God”). My search had ended, just wonderful
For the first time I now see clearly all of the gifts that I get everyday and yes I now have two eagles one for me and one for Judith, just wonderful. “Of course” they came to visit our home after my birth and just after Judith arrived home, just wonderful.
For the first time I can now see the trees, I can see the wind, I can see all of God. I now see stars that I have never seen before, my vision is so clear, just wonderful.
I wish to share with you the process of my ‘new’ birthday with you:
I could feel the answer was close as I was becoming very conscious that there were no more books to read that could help anymore, no amount of vegetarian food would help, I even thought “go back and see Christopher” maybe he can help. My new sarong was not the answer even though it feels great to wear. Not shaving or cutting my hair for 10 weeks was not the answer and there it was, my “avoid this issue list” was getting smaller and smaller. It was time.
I made 3 wishes on the 3rd March 2009. I truly looked at the moon as my focal point and for the first time in my life truly and honestly asked for what I wanted. 11 Days later my wish was granted.
14th March 2009
I was feeling that I had just made the most important and climactic entry into my journal. It was the topic of God. I now know that this was what I wanted to understand and although I have known this for a very long time I now know that I had simply been filling my life with everything else to avoid this. My mind, my past beliefs were in control.
I could feel that I was close to a resolution because I wrote down what I thought God was in my past, then what I thought God was now. That was my breakthrough.
I was home by myself with no other humans about and was lying in the pool on an airbed. I felt relief at last, I had finally written my truth on paper.
* My mind decided to commence a meditation to relax. 2 breathes in and 2 breathes out. I was then conscious that I had done this before, I was conscious that this was not what I was here for at this moment. I felt a calmness I had never felt before. I felt an immense feeling of force around me, my airbed turned, stopped and the setting was complete.
* I started to laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, just laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. I couldn’t stop. I could see all of my internal organs, every one of them, in colour, just laughing with me.
Throughout the period of intense laughter there were pauses which occurred which allowed me to catch my breath. Many times I thought I was crying, another pause, no, it was definitely laughter. I saw for the first time the wind, I could actually see it, I saw the trees for the first time and then everything around me came to be a part of me. I do not know how long this went on for. During this experience my entire past life ran through my consciousness, just like a movie rolling very fast and that is what I was laughing at, my past life, how funny it was, how funny I was, how funny that I thought I controlled everything. Some images of past experiences hang around a little longer than others. I now see why, if I had laughed at everything in my past life I would still be in the pool, just wonderful.
* I was conscious that everything around me was then still, I was still lying on the airbed, then, air just filled my body. It started with small breathes first, in through the nose and out of my mouth. I felt the air inside me. I felt it in areas of my lungs that I had not felt before. I do not know how long this went on for but it escalated, escalated and just kept escalating into such intensity and force that my body arched upwards. It felt like my body was just inhaling the entire universe. Then it was over and yes an eagle circled twice over our home at that moment and then left, I then knew that search was truly over.
* So I hopped off the airbed, stood in the pool and was consciously aware that uh oh, its time. Its time to surrender, its time to let go, I raised my arms and look at the blue sky and said 4 times, God please help me. When I said this for the first time my voice was very shaky, the second time stronger, the third time stronger still, the fourth time the truth, just wonderful
* After some time I hopped out of the pool and my body started to shake, I thought I am cold, no, that was what I would have thought in the past, what is happening. I went to open the pool gate, I knew what it was but I had never seen it before, I pulled it towards me it didn’t open I pushed it away from me it opened, I thought wow how cool is this.
I walked on the grass, I had never felt it before, so soft, so comforting, I walked to the back of the house and looked at something that I recognized from my previous life, oh I thought, I remember them as stairs, I thought well put your feet on them and see what happens. I was inside the house and nothing looked familiar. It was amazing, I went out to the front of the house, I thought I knew where I was but not certain. In a very short period of time I started to sob, cry, growl, choke, I turned down the hallway and just fell to me knees asked God again for help and fell flat on the floor. I said out loud many many times, its over, its over, its over, its all over, my tongue just hang out my mouth, I just dribbled from my mouth all over the floor. After some time I became consciously aware of where I was and thought, “this is not a good position to be in, what are you doing”. A past thought again, so I had a little lick of the saliva on the floor, thought that doesn’t taste to bad, glad you tried it, looked across the floor, 3 little ants came to my face and I just said literally Gidday.
* Stood up and have been smiling and laughing ever since
It is truly the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me.
Judith and I are wonderful and are laughing every day.
It is so funny that we have been in the universe and the universe has been in us the whole time. I feel at this moment that we will use this as our reference point to ensure our growth and to ensure the laughter continues.
I now know with certainty that a humans time will come when it is time.
With Love
Marten Hilberts and Judith Hilberts
Thank you for reading
Marten
Love Everything xxx
I have just finished reading the book “Going Deeper” by Jean-Claude Gerard Koven and he offers some “suggested explorations” hence my visit to your website.
With an open heart I wish to share my awakening with you.
This is a copy of the email I sent to my psychologist after the experience (Although all I felt was a love that I had never experienced before I still thought “well off to the mental home I am going”........Enjoy
Yes and many ‘things’ have happened since, I am ‘hanging’ in there and continuing on my journey of discovery
It is with wonderful delight that I write this email to you.
After many months of reading, hiding, talking, crying, journal entry, discussions, a visit to a clairvoyant, many visits to many web sites, attempts at ego control, sleeplessness, anger, counseling, meditation, astro travel, yoga, vegetarian diet, bewilderment, confusion, doubt, lack of belief and blame my spiritual awaking occurred on Saturday the 14th March 2009 in the mid afternoon. I was born, I had no past, I had no memory, my past was deleted, just wonderful.
I wish to thank you now, truly, for the first time. Thank you.
I now see clearly all of my existence in God and the existence of God in me. You are a very special part of my life and all of the times we met I received all of your love without even knowing it, just wonderful.
(Some of the words that I wrote in my journal were: “I am an organism, the universe is an organism, I am part of the universe and the universe is a part of me, God is a part of me I am a part of God”). My search had ended, just wonderful
For the first time I now see clearly all of the gifts that I get everyday and yes I now have two eagles one for me and one for Judith, just wonderful. “Of course” they came to visit our home after my birth and just after Judith arrived home, just wonderful.
For the first time I can now see the trees, I can see the wind, I can see all of God. I now see stars that I have never seen before, my vision is so clear, just wonderful.
I wish to share with you the process of my ‘new’ birthday with you:
I could feel the answer was close as I was becoming very conscious that there were no more books to read that could help anymore, no amount of vegetarian food would help, I even thought “go back and see Christopher” maybe he can help. My new sarong was not the answer even though it feels great to wear. Not shaving or cutting my hair for 10 weeks was not the answer and there it was, my “avoid this issue list” was getting smaller and smaller. It was time.
I made 3 wishes on the 3rd March 2009. I truly looked at the moon as my focal point and for the first time in my life truly and honestly asked for what I wanted. 11 Days later my wish was granted.
14th March 2009
I was feeling that I had just made the most important and climactic entry into my journal. It was the topic of God. I now know that this was what I wanted to understand and although I have known this for a very long time I now know that I had simply been filling my life with everything else to avoid this. My mind, my past beliefs were in control.
I could feel that I was close to a resolution because I wrote down what I thought God was in my past, then what I thought God was now. That was my breakthrough.
I was home by myself with no other humans about and was lying in the pool on an airbed. I felt relief at last, I had finally written my truth on paper.
* My mind decided to commence a meditation to relax. 2 breathes in and 2 breathes out. I was then conscious that I had done this before, I was conscious that this was not what I was here for at this moment. I felt a calmness I had never felt before. I felt an immense feeling of force around me, my airbed turned, stopped and the setting was complete.
* I started to laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh, just laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. I couldn’t stop. I could see all of my internal organs, every one of them, in colour, just laughing with me.
Throughout the period of intense laughter there were pauses which occurred which allowed me to catch my breath. Many times I thought I was crying, another pause, no, it was definitely laughter. I saw for the first time the wind, I could actually see it, I saw the trees for the first time and then everything around me came to be a part of me. I do not know how long this went on for. During this experience my entire past life ran through my consciousness, just like a movie rolling very fast and that is what I was laughing at, my past life, how funny it was, how funny I was, how funny that I thought I controlled everything. Some images of past experiences hang around a little longer than others. I now see why, if I had laughed at everything in my past life I would still be in the pool, just wonderful.
* I was conscious that everything around me was then still, I was still lying on the airbed, then, air just filled my body. It started with small breathes first, in through the nose and out of my mouth. I felt the air inside me. I felt it in areas of my lungs that I had not felt before. I do not know how long this went on for but it escalated, escalated and just kept escalating into such intensity and force that my body arched upwards. It felt like my body was just inhaling the entire universe. Then it was over and yes an eagle circled twice over our home at that moment and then left, I then knew that search was truly over.
* So I hopped off the airbed, stood in the pool and was consciously aware that uh oh, its time. Its time to surrender, its time to let go, I raised my arms and look at the blue sky and said 4 times, God please help me. When I said this for the first time my voice was very shaky, the second time stronger, the third time stronger still, the fourth time the truth, just wonderful
* After some time I hopped out of the pool and my body started to shake, I thought I am cold, no, that was what I would have thought in the past, what is happening. I went to open the pool gate, I knew what it was but I had never seen it before, I pulled it towards me it didn’t open I pushed it away from me it opened, I thought wow how cool is this.
I walked on the grass, I had never felt it before, so soft, so comforting, I walked to the back of the house and looked at something that I recognized from my previous life, oh I thought, I remember them as stairs, I thought well put your feet on them and see what happens. I was inside the house and nothing looked familiar. It was amazing, I went out to the front of the house, I thought I knew where I was but not certain. In a very short period of time I started to sob, cry, growl, choke, I turned down the hallway and just fell to me knees asked God again for help and fell flat on the floor. I said out loud many many times, its over, its over, its over, its all over, my tongue just hang out my mouth, I just dribbled from my mouth all over the floor. After some time I became consciously aware of where I was and thought, “this is not a good position to be in, what are you doing”. A past thought again, so I had a little lick of the saliva on the floor, thought that doesn’t taste to bad, glad you tried it, looked across the floor, 3 little ants came to my face and I just said literally Gidday.
* Stood up and have been smiling and laughing ever since
It is truly the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me.
Judith and I are wonderful and are laughing every day.
It is so funny that we have been in the universe and the universe has been in us the whole time. I feel at this moment that we will use this as our reference point to ensure our growth and to ensure the laughter continues.
I now know with certainty that a humans time will come when it is time.
With Love
Marten Hilberts and Judith Hilberts
Thank you for reading
Marten
Love Everything xxx