The Punch Bowl and the Choice

[solitary]

Say you're at a metaphorical party. There's a huge punch bowl just brimming with wonderful ingredients. But you see the proverbial foreign object floating in the center. Having been to several parties, you recognize the nature of the object, and know that it doesn't really belong in the punch and isn't normally considered to be fit for consumption by a 3d human. You look around, and see many other party-goers drinking the punch, others huddled together looking horrified, a few just looking on with a bemused smile, some standing alone looking disgusted, and others oblivious to the issue because they never drink punch anyway. Etc etc. So what do you do? It isn't your party, and you didn't make the punch.

Do you privately pull the host aside to whisper that there's a problem, only to be told that you're imagining things and the problem is with you?

Do you point and scream that no one should drink the punch because it's contaminated with a nasty?

Do you snatch up the bowl and empty its contents in the yard, only to be attacked by some of the partiers for busting the buzz?

Do you go ahead and dip a cup and just carry it around with you without drinking it so as to not draw attention to the problem and thus predictably anger and embarrass the host?

Do you watch someone you trust, to take your cue from him or her, since you're not sure if it's a real baddy or just a plastic fake put there as a joke?

Do you quietly leave the party?

Do you loudly blast and upbraid the host for being a gullible idiot or a scheming sadist and then leave the party?

Do you start a brawl?

Choices. Ad infinitum, ad nauseam. All valid, all with consequences.

At different times in our lives the choices we make vary. These are just a few possibilities. There have been times that I would have responded in all the above ways. Now, being in a rather advanced stage of mortality, I would probably opt to either quietly leave or hang out with the bemused smilers who have seen it all before and say nothing, but if asked, would calmly advise against drinking the punch, having already set the example by not drinking it myself and having dealt with the results of the other choices at previous opportunities.

In 3d there's always a beguiling snake in the garden, always a floatie in the punch bowl, always a spoiler of some sort. How we as individual entities respond to these situations is a large part of who we are and who we become, and determine the group to which we attach.

Were the Egyptians wrong to finally see Mubarak as a tyrant and despot, and overthrow him after thirty years of power? Were they just looking in a mirror and seeing the tyrant in themselves, and rather than do what they did, should they have humbled themselves and begged forgiveness for their thoughts and words? Would we have joined with the protesters, or would we have ridden into their midst on camels and horses with whips? Who knows?

It's our choice. In every room of every human life, there are choices. It's up to us. If we choose to idolize one person or concept, we demonize another, and vice-versa. If we can get beyond the polarities, we can see the good and the not-good without much difficulty. If we don't weed and tend our gardens, we have no harvest. If we sympathize with the poor weeds, then we get weeds, because they take over. If we sympathize with the cute little mice pulling the insulation out of our stoves and chewing the house wiring and leaving their excrement on the kitchen counter, the house won't be livable for long. And on and on and on.

So we make our choices and live with the results, and hopefully learn from them. In any untended human life, as in the untended garden, there is a point of no return, a point of no harvest, a point of arrested development. We reap what we sow, yes; but even when we sow good seeds and have the best of intentions, we still have to do the work. The tiny plants must be fed and watered and nourished to survive, according to their individual needs. How much sun, how much water, what type of soil, how long to complete its life cycle. And weeded. The trick is to learn the difference between the weed and the little plant, and how to deal with the snake. That can take awhile. Of course, some weeds, so-called, can be very beneficial, some snakes are useful, and that's enough about that.

The simplicity and the complexity of this cosmos go together, and are one and the same. We're all in this together, and we're all on our own. May we all choose wisely, whatever that might mean, and continue to develop and grow and learn more and more and reach our potential. And there's no end to the potential.

So in the words of that weird Jewish guy, try to be wise as a serpent, and harmless as a dove. There is indeed a season for everything, and a time for every purpose.

[Brittany]

The thing I've been working on lately is not going to pieces when I make a choice whose consequences weren't so great. All the anxiety and self-judgment has gotten me nothing but migraines. I'm trying to focus more on being thankful for the lessons learned, and being able to make more informed decisions in the future.

I think you hit it right on the nose.

[solitary]

The thing I've been working on lately is not going to pieces when I make a choice whose consequences weren't so great. All the anxiety and self-judgment has gotten me nothing but migraines. I'm trying to focus more on being thankful for the lessons learned, and being able to make more informed decisions in the future.

I think you hit it right on the nose.

The letting go of the migraines and what brought them on is a quantum leap, in my opinion.

The practicalities of trying to work with dense matter can get in the way of other pursuits, for sure. If one could always choose the door that leads to other doors, it would be a quick and easy journey; however, sometimes we find ourselves in rather odd rooms and mazes and halls of mirrors and all manner of situations that slow us down.

I guess when we're in the place of making difficult decisions with little understanding of the possible consequences, intended and otherwise, we should be thankful that we've made it this far, where the lessons are not so easy or simple or obvious.

Of course, this kind of thinking can lead to a conclusion that people should be thankful for suffering, and it gets muddy from there. Many cruel deeds have been done on this planet because somebody thought suffering, either their own or another's, was a righteous thing, and we get martyrs and torture and scapegoats and salvation by proxy and sacrificial kings and all sorts of things beyond my current level of comprehension.

So I seem to be rather stalled at this moment in time trying to figure out the efficacy of suffering. Not minor inconveniences. I mean the awful mental and physical and emotional suffering that sentient beings undergo, the causes of it, what good is it, and what, if anything, can or should be done about it. I know the stock answers, from the sources I've studied, but it's something I have to work out for myself.

[yossarian]

Well said! A thoughtful lesson in discrimination.

Choose to focus on those things that multiply the fruits in your life, and decimate the weeds. That's my motto.

Suffering is not something to be sought. The way I see suffering is a division of responsibility. It's my higher self's job to cause me to suffer in precisely helpful ways. It's my job to attempt to end my suffering. We have divided responsibility, and if I try to do my higher self's job for him, I am completely screwing up.

Virtue is to seek after peace, joy, love. The more we seek the better we get at attaining them. You can say thank you, not for the suffering, but for the fruits of suffering. Some forms of suffering lead to a greater harvest in your garden. Not any suffering - only specific forms. Your higher self will provide these, or if you are exceedingly wise, you can sometimes see them yourself. For instance sometimes you can see that working hard today, while maybe painful, will result in much happiness tomorrow and avert an even greater pain.

Anyway good post it made me think.

[solitary]

Well said! A thoughtful lesson in discrimination.

Thanks. I value your opinions, which provide much food for more thought.