A theory I have

[turtledude23]

See the picture I attached.

I think as a spiritual path starts you learn alot of cool new things about life, but meanwhile you become more fake, rigid, arrogant, etc. and are actually unconsciously doing alot of STS things while consciously believing your striving to be some kind of saint - at least thats what I noticed in myself and what I think I notice in some people in new age communities. Then eventually you reach a terminal point where you can no longer handle the fakeness you've saturated yourself in and start being more real. The whole time you're polarizing. You start off at the left end not having chosen a polarity, you sway from side to side, going up and rolling down, kind of like in a snowboarding half pipe (the graph should be a double bell curve to illustrate that), finally you dedicate yourself to a path and go up alot, but since you feel alone in your endeavours you need a shell of fakeness and isolation to protect yourself from others judgements. Then something really painful happens and you realize you need to change the way you approach life.

Your thoughts?

[Sacred Fool]

Yes, and from there you're double bell curve spirals upwards. This is a pattern of complacency and movement I've repeated many times. Over time the bell curved bumps of resistance can get shaved down and the ride can get a bit smoother.

[Confused]

I think as a spiritual path starts you learn alot of cool new things about life, but meanwhile you become more fake, rigid, arrogant, etc. and are actually unconsciously doing alot of STS things while consciously believing your striving to be some kind of saint - at least thats what I noticed in myself and what I think I notice in some people in new age communities. Then eventually you reach a terminal point where you can no longer handle the fakeness you've saturated yourself in and start being more real. The whole time you're polarizing. You start off at the left end not having chosen a polarity, you sway from side to side, going up and rolling down, kind of like in a snowboarding half pipe (the graph should be a double bell curve to illustrate that), finally you dedicate yourself to a path and go up alot, but since you feel alone in your endeavours you need a shell of fakeness and isolation to protect yourself from others judgements. Then something really painful happens and you realize you need to change the way you approach life.

Your thoughts?

This is excellent articulation of what is otherwise quite a difficult topic to broach and explore. Thank you for opening this thread. I recently discovered that in one section of the LOO, Ra made a stunning observation about Jim -

101.2 Questioner: Thank you. What has caused the swelling in Jim’s body, and what can be done to heal it?

Ra: I am Ra. For the answer to this query we must begin with the consideration of the serpent, signifying wisdom. This symbol has the value of the ease of viewing the two faces of the one who is wise. Positive wisdom adorns the brow indicating indigo-ray work. Negative wisdom, by which we intend to signify expressions which effectually separate the self from the other-self, may be symbolized by poison of the fangs. To use that which a mind/body/spirit complex has gained of wisdom for the uses of separation is to invite the fatal bite of that wisdom’s darker side.

The entity has a mental/emotional tendency, which has been lessening in distortion for some of your space/time, towards negative wisdom......

[BlatzAdict]

this is silly but... your bell curve looks like a nipple. lol I call it the nipple constant.

Then something really painful happens and you realize you need to change the way you approach life.

Your thoughts?

Yes you do.. I've come up with a new theory on relationships as a result, and learning to pay attention to how my thoughts affect others as opposed to how they effect me. Well maybe it's not that new but just thinking about a relationship. I no longer view it as a union, but as the third person in the relationship.

When you say something, that and the energy associated with it goes up in the air, then it gets recieved and effects the other person. IT doesn't matter if u are right or wrong, but making the other person feel bad is a detriment to what we are trying to bring to the world. Light and Love.

Makes me pay attention a lot more to how I treat people and how others treat others as well as how others treat me.. Loving yourself does include, excluding individuals who would not see the divinity in you. Or for lack of a better phrase lack of respect.
Less of a victim to my own emotions, more of an active player in the co creation of a peaceful loving world. I can't believe it took me so long to realize that.

[Bring4th_Austin]

I'm not sure I can relate 100% to this topic, and perhaps it's because I'm misunderstanding. Even before my spiritual awakening my life would come in waves of self-realization, followed by times of contemplation and transformation. Every time a cycle would finish my life would change drastically; I noticed and embraced the process long before I was able to find my spiritual beliefs.

This would be the only "New Age community" I am involved in, and I can't say it allows me to notice a cycle like this.

[Lorna]

my experience is similar to yours abridgetoofar

[seejay21]

I like that bell curve, it makes sense. I'd add that when you are "yourself" the Universe tends to take care of you. You'll find yourself surrounded with even flowing positive synchronicity. When you are not yourself, the synchronicity is missed.

[Brittany]

I think I can relate to what you're saying. For me, people were always calling me crazy. I simply couldn't conform to the societal norm, even as a child. I wound up having really low self esteem, so I built up a shell around myself- this personality I wore like a set of clothing so people would accept me. At the same time I was angry at the world for being so cruel, and I started seeing myself as superior to other people. By high school I was displaying pretty established STS behaviors. It wasn't until I really ended up hurting someone that I did a double take and realized what I'd become. I realized I didn't want people to look at me with fear, and I didn't want to make people miserable. My compassion is just too strong. So I began the slow trip back up the polarity scale

Still, I would think every journey is unique to the point that it would be hard to quantify it in a highly generalized sense.

[kycahi]

I realized I didn't want people to look at me with fear, and I didn't want to make people miserable. My compassion is just too strong. So I began the slow trip back up the polarity scale.

What do I know, really, but that reads like it is your Choice moment. I'm guessing that the slow trip up, for the most part, felt right and, at least some part of you got more self-esteem. :exclamation:

[Brittany]

I've had numerous "choice" moments. Only looking back now do I realize how potent that particular moment was for me. The fact that the person I hurt so badly forgave me like it was nothing only made me want to help others that much more.

[turtledude23]

this is silly but... your bell curve looks like a nipple. lol I call it the nipple constant.

Haha, yeah, I thought it looked like a condom when I was drawing it. I know its not a perfect bell curve, I added the nipple because i felt like I had an even quicker descent into isolation right before my outlook changing event.

[BlatzAdict]

I've had numerous "choice" moments. Only looking back now do I realize how potent that particular moment was for me. The fact that the person I hurt so badly forgave me like it was nothing only made me want to help others that much more.

i swear it's like you peered into my life. and you are writing exactly what I go through. I want sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo badly to help others, I want it, I breathe it, I eat it, I crap it, I whisper it and shout it.

The problem is, finding the best route of action in order to be of service, and communicating it in such a way as to avoid fights, and to avoid conflict. To do all of that and yet still make people feel better, and to expand their horizons in the process. That I still need help with.

It's like trying to skip on stones that barely reveal themselves on a deep river and trying not to slip in the process.

[Grillwise]

Basically nailing it on the head as far as my experience is concerned, Tdude.