How to manage my fear

[Cboynto]

Hhgghhh

[BrownEye]

I am fearful to open myself up to the possibility of something bad happening.

Fear itself attracts negative experience. Fear is a choice in perception, a chosen perspective, which shoehorns all subsequent experience into that chosen frame. If we truly want to see things that scare us, it will be given to us.


I was recently discussing what a "successful life" might be. If we take two mirroring lives and compare them, where the only differences are the chosen perspectives, we can see a good life and a bad life, all from the shading of our lense.

One person can find meaning to every experience, find joy in the moment, knowing that all is in order, and that they are always in good hands. ---------The other person finds randomness in everything, seeks out the things to complain or be unhappy about, and considers themself to be the victim of life experiences.-----------Even though both went through exactly the same experiences, they chose opposite perspectives of experience.

One would say he had a great life, while the other would say he had a terrible life.

To refuse the experience of the life may be to come back and do it all over again. How is that for a perspective?

[GentleReckoning]

I had irrational fears of the dark for a long long time.

One little trick that I developed is to imagine your aura/field extending out and filling up the entire area, pushing all other entities either to the edge, or completely outside.

Alternatively, you can imagine a golden shield encasing you that protects you from the paranormal.

Ultimately though, your fear is a sign that you have a lesson that you should probably pay attention to in this life. (or a previous one!)

[reeay]

I don't think fears are irrational, they are difficult to understand because it may be connected to events/memories that seem unconnected, that is not 'processed' (resolved). Like past traumas or difficult events. The long-term solution is to understand where this is coming from. You could use your dreams or other forms of self-reflection and self-discovery to uncover the deeper issue.

Your brain has now wired itself to re-experience this anxiety and fear, so it has become a habit. To resolve this fear, you could try to find ways to self-soothe.

Create a 'safe space' in your imagination. It's a place that you may go in your mind, where you feel completely safe and soothed. Imagine this place that is so beautiful and breathtaking that you feel relaxed & rejuvenated just 'being' there. Invite your guides or whoever you feel is protecting you. Ask them to help you to understand why you are becoming fearful. You can create a name for this place. As you imagine this 'place' and feel relaxed, wrap your arms around yourself. Gently tap your arm one arm at a time. Tap about 25 times. Hold the image of the place and chant the name. One one thousand, two one thousand... that's the beat you're going for.

When you do this exercise over and over again, you may start to associate relaxation and safety with this 'place' and name... and, in times of distress, you may be able to invoke the experience of relaxation just by saying the name. (I use this exercise when I work with PTSD clients to help them to self-sooth... it's not the actual treatment to severe trauma or anxiety, but a tool for soothing oneself).

Some people use gem stones (my favorite is tourmaline) or prayer or using your imagination to imagine protection or deep breathing. Whatever helps to sooth yourself during those anxiety - use it. Keep using it when you feel the fear. Make that a new habit.

Lastly, it helps to be your own skeptic - a compassionate skeptic. Your brain is being hijacked by the oldest part of your brain (this part is usually associated with survival issues - fear/anger - and its responses - fight/flight/freeze). When your brain gets hijacked, your thinking part of the brain doesn't work so well. That's why people called it 'irrational' but it's a natural human response to react emotionally and run with it. You have the power to stop that and try new ways to cope or to handle the situation

I highly recommend EFT - Emotional Freedom Technique (there are lots of videos to watch for free).

---

Also, you could use your imagination to 'confront' whatever invokes fear within you and to work through this issue by holding conversations with whatever is bothering you.

[LastBreath]

I am fearful to open myself up to the possibility of something bad happening.

Fear itself attracts negative experience. Fear is a choice in perception, a chosen perspective, which shoehorns all subsequent experience into that chosen frame. If we truly want to see things that scare us, it will be given to us.

I think that's incorrect to say that the fear is a "choice". It sounds to me that the OP was conditioned to fear the paranormal through films and media that portrayed it in a fearful way, and not through conscious choice. I think that's like saying a rape victim who chose to be traumatized. I have fears that I really don't like having, fears that I didn't consciously choose but which developed after certain experiences. To say that I could suddenly overcome these fears through a sheer act of will at a moments choice is so unrealistic, unlikely and impractical that I wonder if you've actually given this any serious thought, or if you just read it on some website and ran with it. How is the OP going to overcome a lifetime of conditioning in a moments choice? I bet that if our film makers and story tellers portrayed the paranormal in a highly spirited, positive and loving manner that OP wouldn't be afraid of it. OP said himself that he has never experienced anything paranormal, so where did the idea that ghosts and the paranormal are scary come from then? Just look at any movie that deals with the subject and the answer is pretty obvious that this is cultural conditioning, not conscious choice like you imply.

This is a concept I see all the time in the New Age community, that everything that ever happens to you was a choice and your responsibility. But I think sometimes peoples idea of spirituality places way too much emphasis on individual responsibility while ignoring environmental factors and the fact that we live in a large community of other beings that influence each other. I think somewhere there has to be a middle ground between individual responsibility and responsibility for the community as a whole.

[BrownEye]

This is a concept I see all the time in the New Age community, that everything that ever happens to you was a choice and your responsibility.

Yes, and you may not even come to understand in this particular lifetime.

---

Your brain is being hijacked by the oldest part of your brain (this part is usually associated with survival issues - fear/anger - and its responses - fight/flight/freeze).

I see this as a refusal of something in the "past". This refusal of an experience forces that experience to appear again and again, rearing up with more "life" to it every time it returns. Catalyst works this way, becoming a stronger force every time it it presents itself to you, until it is finally dealt with and accepted.

[bosphorus]

i guess the transcript below might help a bit

take care

http://lightworkers.org/content/48740/pt...tober-2008

[Cboynto]

Thanks everyone for your perspective and kind suggestions. You have given me plenty to think about.
CB

[Aaron]

Hey bosphorus,

In accordance with guideline 12, can you please edit your post to contain a link to the channeled session, along with one or two paragraphs from the session, rather than posting the whole thing here?

12) When sharing a link to a webpage (including to something within llresearch.org), please either:
a) provide a short description of the page in your own words
b) provide an excerpt of the material (one to three paragraphs) along with the link.
Doing this rather than posting a "blind link" prevents confusion and saves time for readers.

Likewise, when posting material not your own to the forums, limit the amount of text posted to one to three paragraphs along with a link to the material, if possible. This avoids readers having to scroll through massively long posts.

Thanks!

[bosphorus]

Hey bosphorus,

In accordance with guideline 12, can you please edit your post to contain a link to the channeled session, along with one or two paragraphs from the session, rather than posting the whole thing here?

12) When sharing a link to a webpage (including to something within llresearch.org), please either:
a) provide a short description of the page in your own words
b) provide an excerpt of the material (one to three paragraphs) along with the link.
Doing this rather than posting a "blind link" prevents confusion and saves time for readers.

Likewise, when posting material not your own to the forums, limit the amount of text posted to one to three paragraphs along with a link to the material, if possible. This avoids readers having to scroll through massively long posts.

Thanks!

ok aaron, i surely will

[BlatzAdict]

"Fear is like a giant fog. It sits on your brain and blocks everything - real feelings, true happiness, real joy. They can't get through that fog. But you lift it, and buddy, you're in for the ride of your life." - Defending Your Life

[reeay]

Your brain is being hijacked by the oldest part of your brain (this part is usually associated with survival issues - fear/anger - and its responses - fight/flight/freeze).

I see this as a refusal of something in the "past". This refusal of an experience forces that experience to appear again and again, rearing up with more "life" to it every time it returns. Catalyst works this way, becoming a stronger force every time it it presents itself to you, until it is finally dealt with and accepted.

Yes the 'emotional memories' that operates behind the fear or anger or strong emotions are not processed sufficiently due to being unconscious of its 'presence' or refusal to work through them. In that sense there is an element of 'choice' that you mentioned.

The neuropathway of emotions and emotional memories is like an express way lane on an information highway.... the information reach our awareness much faster than other types of memory and rational thought, that would otherwise balance our emotions/emotional memory. So that's a theory that may explain why people react before they are able to regulate their emotions and think through things carefully.

[BrownEye]

Something that was in my mind is how empowering it feels to be aware that we can choose how we perceive reality. Tonight, Horuseus sent me a link that has many concepts I am dealing with, plus a helpful concept for dealing with fear.

........ by constantly choosing to attend to your higher dimensional input, you are consciously choosing to release your physical world and attach your attention to the higher frequency of reality.

“Please remember, the reality that you choose to perceive is the reality that you choose to live. Therefore, you are creating your own reality by the choices you make about the frequency of stimuli to which you attend. As you remember that you have the Power to make this choice and the Wisdom to primarily focus on that, which feels like Love, your formerly unconscious ascension process becomes conscious.

“Your ability to make a conscious perceptual choice is, also, an antidote to fear. If you are consistently conscious of the fact that you have a choice about what you wish to perceive, you will fully realize that that YOU are creating your reality. Additionally, if you are in constant contact with your Higher Expression, you will be able to ask questions in order to clarify your process. This sense of control of your ascension, as well as the constant source of enlightenment, will greatly expand your ability to attend to love and ignore fear.

http://suzanneliephd.blogspot.com.br/201...cting.html

[Lycen]

Hello Cboynto!

When I was in high school I let my self be pulled into a very dark and scary place. Each day the thought of going to school was terrifying. I let myself be enveloped with fear to a great degree for too long a time. To the point my body could not handle it and kinda "broke". I developed a great anxiety for being around most people. It manifest as my head twitching, hearth starting to race, mouth dry, body becoming weak and also shaky. I had to keep myself together every time I was not moving and people where around.

One day I noticed the thick fear I was living in. I felt it and the depths of it alarmed me, for now I saw this fear as my destroyer. It was in my eyes "Do or Die" for I could not imagine surviving with such a fear. So I did, I did everything that I thought would help me over come it. I tried swimming because I thought it would let me relax and somehow mend this broken body. It did not feel as I expected, though only once, the effect was not what I was searching. And the interaction with people even if brief was enough to leave it alone. I had to keep going though, because I needed a solution "live or die".

I noticed my body getting tense when the fear/anxiety was present. Upon that I started to consciously relax my muscles, shoulders/neck area was the most tense. Breathing consciously was also essential to that. This was/is my road to healing. When I shook off the thick fear, it became a matter of recovery.

Years have passed (5+) and I am living contently in regards to my body. It was not a one day fix and I still bear the scars of it now. But I can be around people once again in a state of calm and the neck twitch thing is not my reality anymore.

I guess my advice would be to try those things that you think/feel would help. How ever silly those ideas may be to you're conscious mind. If you think/feel they could be helpful, do them! I used the word conscious for a reason I see. Be aware of you're self when fear makes itself known and focus on the solutions.

I hope this helps.

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