The Camelot Journal

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from August 30, 1992:

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and in light through this instrument. At this time, it is our privilege to offer ourselves in the attempt to speak to any further queries which those present may have for us. Is there a query with which we may begin?

Carla: Can you give us some kind of insight on how to hold onto the humor and to not get so intense that we can’t see where we are?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. The sense of humor that is so valuable an ally upon the spiritual path may be described as a sense of proportion which allows you to see beyond the moment in which you are experiencing one motion, event, experience, or another. This perspective allows you to place each individual experience within the larger continuum that moves ever onward as the river flowing.

Look then at any moment in which your humor has seemingly evaporated, at the entire situation in which you find yourself. Look at the world about you, seeing those entities and events which are momentous and powerful. See yourself placed within the context of a Creator which has made an infinite variety of entities of Itself which seek their identity and the nature of the Creator through myriads of interactions that may or may not make what you call sense, and which may reveal to you the humorous nature of the human creature.

This creature is one full of desire to know the truth, full of the energy of inspiration, full of the confusion of the illusion, and yet which moves valiantly forward, sideways, up, down, and around in order that it might progress yet one step further. See the anguish, the confusion, the joys, the determination, all of the emotions that comprise the resources upon which you draw. See them moving with you as colors of the rainbow. Look at yourself upon this rainbow journey and remember that that which is of value is the love which you create in each moment and all else shall fall away, having little of impact in your future. As time progresses, only the love remains.

Carla wanted to know how to keep a sense of humor when times get intense, and we can’t see where we are. Q’uo replied by saying that a sense of humor was a valuable ally on the spiritual path because it gives us a sense of proportion and the larger view of our experiences. Then Q’uo suggested that she should look at any situation where her humor has vanished, and then she should look at the world around her where the infinite Creator has made a multitude of entities out of Itself that seek their own identity and that of the Creator in ways which make little sense but reveal the humorous nature of the human being. Q’uo went on to say that this human creature seeks the truth in ways that move in every which direction with a rainbow of emotions from happy to sad, and recommended that Carla remember that which is important in her life is the love that she creates in the moment, and then let all else fall away until only love remains. On February 10, 2024, Q’uo suggested that a sense of humor was a valuable ally on the spiritual path:

Thus, the sense of humor, the sense of proportion, of seeing the path as that which contains paradox, contains riddles, contains puzzles to make one smile, the synchronicities, the coincidences that remind one that it is not only a spiritual path of purity, and purity of intention, but it is a path that one may laugh, relax, have a good time and be full of that which you have called joy, for the laughter and the joy are also fuel for the spiritual path. If one wishes to travel in a dedicated fashion, as you have mentioned, it is possible to move forward in that way. And yet, if one adds the joy, and the laughter, it speeds the path, for it opens the heart even fuller so that more love can be given or laughter can be had, or joy can be shared.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Carla: No, thank you, Q’uo.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query?

Carla: To follow that one up, I would like to ask if there is a way that we can trigger remembrance of all that you have said in the middle of having a fit of some kind, being intensely, overly involved, the way we all do get sometimes, and not seeing anything funny about anything? What kind of trigger can we use to get out of that intense and ever-inwardly spiraling kind of way of concentrating and frustrating ourselves?

I am Q’uo, am aware of your query, my sister. We are of the opinion that it is well for each seeker to experience fully the emotions of the moment without contrivance or control, for it is in these spontaneous responses to life’s “slings and arrows,” shall we say, that the truer nature of your inner self is revealed. And, as this nature is revealed, then you see those areas of strength and those areas of weakness and may work more successfully upon your weaknesses having them thusly revealed.

Thus, we would not suggest that one attempt to impose a sense of humor, or of any other kind of control, upon the moment in which the experience is “hot,” shall we say, and the emotions are turbulent.

However, to remain with such turbulence overly long provides the difficulty, much as the electrical circuit that has had too much voltage in the weakest point and overloads. Thus, it is at this time that we would suggest that the humor be invoked by any means which has value or shows efficacy. These possibilities would include the making of a taped reminder to yourself while you are feeling the inspiration of the overview and have with you the ally of humor. This tape could then be played back to yourself as a reminder that that which you have experienced has value. And when the value has been determined, then the humor may be invoked.

It may be that you find there are others in the field of consciousness expansion which have written upon the subject of humor and which give an overview that is felt by you to be valuable and which could be referred to at the appropriate moment. It may be that there are certain moving pictures that bring you this sense of humor and relief from the difficulty of the moment that might also be utilized. Find that procedure or method which has value to you and use it when you feel that the time is appropriate.

Carla wanted to know how to find a way out of a situation that is intense and find some kind of humor in the situation. Q’uo suggested that Carla remain in the moment of frustration without attempting to control it because it is in such situations that the truer nature of her self that is revealed where she could see her strengths and weaknesses. Then Q’uo said that after a period of time it would be well if she could invoke a sense of humor perhaps by making a tape recording at a time when she is experiencing an overview of her life where a sense of humor might be experienced and play it back when it would be helpful; or she could read about humor written by spiritual seekers; or she could watch a funny movie. On January 11, 1981, Latwii spoke of the value of humor:

My brother, the value of humor is a pale shadow of reality. Reality, as we understand it, is likened unto what this instrument would call an orgasm. That is, the basic ecstasy or joy of the universe. That is, the energy that is love. It is existent in all levels of being. Laughter is one outward expression of the emotional state of what you may call orgasm, however, it would not be advisable for you to call it this during your working hours while speaking to your workmates, or they might think you a little strange.

You must understand that this particular word is known clearly to you as a common human experience, whereas it has never been understood that laughter, when entered into totally and wholly rather than nervously or embarrassedly, is another form of the same energy. Laughter is available to all. Laughter is a healing, comforting, lovely energy and indeed is one of the most highly prized of all states of being. We find the universe to be full of the laughter—or the song—of joy.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Carla: Just a clarification. I take it that you mean not to attempt to move into that which is going on in your thoughts, not your actions. You’re not talking about the world of manifestation here, you’re talking about the world of internal thought, right? Because you obviously wouldn’t want to allow yourself to give into your impulse to kill your employer or something like that.

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. You are in the large part correct, for we do not advise the losing of the self-control to the point of infringing upon the free will of another, but were suggesting that the internal experience which moves you so mightily is that which must needs be expressed in order to be examined at a later time for the fruits of such experience.

Is there another query, my sister?

Carla: Not at this time. Thank you very much, Q’uo.

Q’uo: I am Q’uo, and again we thank you, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

Carla: Yeah, one more. No prejudice intended—could your answers not possibly be more direct and to the point, being as we here on the Earth plane think that way? Do you understand?

I am Q’uo, and we are not certain that we grasp your query. Could you find another means of stating it?

Carla: No. Thank you anyway.

I am Q’uo, and we shall speak to that which we feel we grasp. Our responses are tempered by two features of this illusion, the first being the limitations of the instrument and the language with which it is familiar; the second, being more important, and that is the free will of each entity, so that as we speak in response to any query, we give that which will inspire thought, rather than that which will completely sate the hunger, wishing not to do another’s work for that entity, for it is the work that is the value of the decision-making and the choosing.

May we speak in any further way to any other query, my sister?

Carla: No. Thank you.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you. Is there another query?

Carla: I have one more. You’re talking about having already opened the heart and working in communication and inner work, but I don’t feel like my heart’s open all the time at all. I feel like I’m frequently screwing up and blocking energies or over-spiking them so that they’re overly active and so forth, and that my heart isn’t always just great. I don’t really feel that I could really say, “Well, yeah, I’m doing lots of inner work now because I’m all done with that open heart stuff.” I’m not. Could you comment on that, because I don’t feel like I’m “here” and not “there.” Maybe I’m “there,” but I’m also back down in blocked personal relationships and stuff, too.

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. As you learn any skill, whether it be how to open the heart in unconditional love, how to juggle, or how to cook a certain meal, there will be those expressions of the skill which are better done, shall we say, than others. There will be the dropping of the ball for the juggler. Yet, if the juggler can accomplish a certain skill or procedure, the ability is present. And it is to the entity that has moved into the opening of the heart that we speak in relation to the seeking of truth and the serving as an instrument or vocal channel. If an entity has the ability to do this, called “loving without condition,” it is not important that the entity is not always able to express this loving without conditions, but it is important that the entity has the desire to do so and will examine its experience with that desire foremost in the mind.

Is there another query, my sister?

Carla: Just sort of a left turn into the question about why can’t you speak more simply? Let’s see how to put this. I realize that you want to teach and not do our learning for us. There are often teachers around that give you a very simple—and something you can hold onto—type of answer, and they seem to have real success in being able to deal with spiritual questions a lot of times. Does the infringement of free will sort of “catch up” to you after awhile, is that what you’re saying, when the spiritual student goes over these own issues himself, looking basically at what you have said just for principles that he can use as resources… that the student has then done a better job than if the student just heard somebody that was absolutely brilliant just telling him everything, and said, “Okay, I’ll believe that”? There is a difference between those two? If you both have the same belief in the end?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. In a large part, you are correct. However, we are as we are, and we must, in order to remain true to that which we are, speak in the way in which we speak when given the constraints of the language, the ability of the instrument, and the free will of those to whom we speak. There are many teachers. There are as many teachers as there are entities and experiences, and each will teach with a certain voice, a style that will be unique to that teacher. Those words which have value to the student will find their way to the student’s heart. This is why we always recommend that each student discriminate those words and concepts which we offer, and forget those that have no meaning, saving only those which ring of truth for that entity. We recommend that each student find those teachers with which the student is comfortable, for all teach and all learn.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: No. I thought that that was a really helpful answer. Thank you very much.

I am Q’uo, and again we thank you, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

[Pause]

I am Q’uo, and we feel that the queries have been exhausted for this session of working, and we would take this opportunity to thank each for inviting our presence in your meditation this day. We are greatly honored to be so invited and we cannot express to you the joy that we feel at the opportunity of walking with you upon your journey, even but a step, for as we walk with you, we walk with the Creator, and are overjoyed at the opportunity to learn from you as we share with you of that which is ours to share.

At this time we shall take our leave of this instrument and this group, leaving each as always in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are known to you as those of Q’uo. Adonai, my friends. Adonai.

This morning I ran a couple of errands with my first stop being at Thieneman’s Nursery to buy another flat of dianthus, a flat of geraniums, a flat of calibrachoa, a flat of vinca, and a pot of coral bells. My second stop was at Feeder’s Supply to buy more kitty litter. When I got home I went across the street to a neighbor of mine for the last 40 years whose husband passed into larger life yesterday morning. I brought her a bouquet of flowers, and we talked for a while about how her husband passed and what the future may hold for her.

This afternoon I transplanted the vinca, the calibrachoa, and the geranium into the Ruins Mound. 

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 25

By What Star Shall You Steer

I am of the principle of Jesus the Christ and I greet you in the full and divine love of creation and Creator.

Does it not seem to you somehow unusual that we who accept the phrase of Holy Spirit never call ourselves holy and that we who are the spirit of the living Christ never call Jesus Christ, Lord?

We are of the principle of full and divine consciousness and as such we are servants of your souls, those who love the spirit within you.

It is for you to choose what principle guides your life, by what star you shall steer. Shall it be the love of Jesus Christ and shall you call Jesus Christ Lord of your life? That is your decision.

Your capacity for worship is your own private treasure. May you ever enlarge and make more noble and uplifted your times of worship and adoration! And if, as yet, you do not worship and do not adore, then spend more time in the inner room of silence, listening, in the growing awareness of love.

We leave you in the love and peace of Jesus the Christ, now and ever. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. The Q’uo quote today comes from August 30, 1992:

The question this afternoon has to do with voices and emotions that we hear as we go through our daily round of activities that might speak to us of fear, of memories of the past, of feelings of abandonment, of feelings of joy and peace, of anxiety, of wondering exactly how we fit our lives into the larger picture of the world scene. When we hear these voices, is there the need or any benefit to bringing the voices under any kind of supervision or control? Is it well to allow each voice to speak its own message and then determine what value the message has for us? What value do these voices have as we go through our daily round of activities, and how can we make reliable decisions concerning our service and our growth as we listen to the variety of voices in our heads and in our lives?

(Carla channeling)

I am Q’uo. Greetings to each of you in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. How precious each of you is, and how grateful we are that you would wish to call us to share in your meditation and to offer our service of speaking upon the topic of the inner dialogue and its reason for being, its way of working, and its relevance to your spiritual journey. To say that we are offering a service is true; yet, we also wish to say that we are fallible. Therefore, if any opinion of ours does not seem right to you, it would be very gratifying to us if you would leave it behind and keep for thought only those things which seem helpful and right to you, for each has a personal discrimination which is far wiser in its instincts than any outer authority.

As foundation for this collection of thoughts, we would ask you to visualize the seeker that you are in meditation with the entire universe of meaning, both without and within you. You are perhaps more used to thinking of an inner and an outer experience. Yet, the outer experience is, at a deep level, formed sometimes decisively by the inner self. Thusly, the visualization of the self in meditation, bringing the outer world within by allowing, accepting, and forgiving outer experience becomes half of the self’s realization that all of the infinite creation is within each seeker, each self-conscious entity. The outer struggles seem light except when those outer influences come too close and resemble too much the difficulties of the self within. The outer experience is most usefully thought of as a mirror reflecting to you your inner situation and the joys and challenges of it.

Within you lie all qualities: those that you think of as contradictory, those you think of as good and as bad. All imagined possibilities of self lie fallow within each person. Each is completely universal. You are all that there is. Within your consciousness lies this knowledge. Yet, as you come to your work of spiritual seeking, it is not usually one’s desire to begin with the broad and untamed bewilderment of self-contradictory forces. Far more natural to one seeking is the urge to move into a positive service and love-filled environment.

This is a good instinct, and for the student who is beginning to be aware of the choices that can be made, it is a functional and practical point of view. The decisions are normally fairly simple in an ethical or philosophical sense. Faced with a choice between loving behavior and self-serving, lying, or other negative behavior the student will either choose, usually, to do the positive thing or to fail to do the positive thing but to remember the preference in 20/20 hindsight, as this instrument would say, looking at the undone thing that would have been positive or the error that was not positive and saying, “I will remember to affect future decisions because this decision did not satisfy me.”

However, the query that you have asked is about those times when there is no obvious positive choice, that control of choosing the positive thing is a kind of artifact of one doing work while attempting to open the heart. The choices at that level bloom like flowers and are often irresistible. The virtue of service, the joy of giving, the desire to make those you contact feel better—these are the choices made easily, lovingly, and freely by those moving to open the center of heart energy.

Yet, the spiritual path of evolution becomes like the planet that you rest upon—creatures of night as well as day—and after the heart is first opened on a reliable basis there yet remains the traversing of the twilight and evening and midnight of the spiritual journey. As you advance in your choices, they become less than obvious. The deepest, most profound darkness lies upon the advancement of the spiritual path. Within this darkness there is one light: the reflecting light as of your moon to this planet of yours. This spiritual reflective essence may be called your higher self, the larger self, the all-mind. It may be called the Christ within or simply guidance. Whatever it is called, it does not cast a clear and bright light, but casts an often deceiving, very subtle moonlight of the spirit. And in this light, with only your guidance to have faith in, you make the more subtle, more difficult, and very important choices having to do with the energies of communication and inner work. Most of the inner work is done in this spiritual, deep-shadowed twilight.

The group question for this session was:  What is the topic of the inner dialogue and its reason for being, its way of working, and its relevance to the spiritual journey? Q’uo began their reply by suggesting that we use meditation to see that we have the entire universe within our being, and what we see as our inner self often creates what we see happening to us in our outer reality. They said that we contain all qualities, the good and the bad, but as spiritual seekers we tend to focus on the positive nature of a love-filled environment, and this is a good choice for continuing on the positive path of opening the heart. However, Q’uo then said that our spiritual path will proceed through the darkness of, what I would say is the veil of forgetting, that makes such choices much more difficult as to what is positive and what is not, and because of this darkness we must rely on a small inner light of our higher self, or guidance, to show us the way to do the more difficult and spiritual work of communication and inner realization. On May 21, 1995, Q’uo said that we all have assistance from inner light to show us the way to do spiritual work:

As the sands of the sea, as the stars in your sky, just so infinite are the shining spirits which are embodied within this creation who turn their glowing faces toward the Creator in praise and thanksgiving. At this time many, many of those not incarnate in physical vehicles flock within the inner planes of your globe. To those who ask for help they flock by the millions to offer their candle power to heighten the inner light of those in need. Yours is third density. Ask for help and help will be given you. Reach out the hand and it will be full of invisible but real love. You are loved, not because you have achieved but because you exist, a child of the infinite Creator. You are enfolded, snuggled, by invisible nurturing arms. Every cell of your body is perfect. Your truth is that all is perfect. There is no striving necessary, for all is well.

Why is this so? The gates to learning the truth open only to those who are able to use the keys. The first key is the silence of meditation. And after the resources of meditation, contemplation and prayer have aided the seeker enough to open the heart, then the choices become those focusing into the universal nature of the self and an archetypical understanding that allows the seeker to have more keys minted and placed in the spiritual grasp.

Each period of learning at this level is called initiation by your people, and it is, indeed, the beginning of a new subtle pattern which you shall choose. Yet, this choice is not simple, for it is a choice of an entire pattern, a pattern of thought, of intuition, certainly not a clear-cut process. Rather than working upon opening the heart to all that there is in service, the initiatory lessons have to do with solidifying the nature of the self, of envisioning and seeing the more desirable pattern or way of being the self, and, overarching all, the pattern by which the seeker chooses personally and only for the self to discipline itself.

The personality is a magical thing at this spiritual level. It is not the personality of your culture, the right word, the ready joke or laugh. We speak rather of focusing into the true unique nature of you, this one seeker. For you, the joy that awaits at the end of each choice is an enlarged vision, not only of the self, but of the nature of service. You know in your open hearts that you love very, very deeply, to the core of your being, the one Source of all that there is, the one great Thought that initiated and continues creation. You wish all good things. This is always so.

Yet, the later lessons are often tedious to the impatient spirit who wishes to get on with being of service. Yet, as you gaze backwards and see a completed initiation and testing and feel the enlarged strength and stability of your compassion, you feel that all the subtle inner discussion was, indeed, not pointless and not irritating and certainly not a sign of laziness or personal weakness, and you are encouraged by a feeling of inner strength. You see yourself not only open-hearted, but free, for the open-hearted one has not yet dealt with the murderer, the thief, the traitor, all of the negative possibilities that lie within, except by closing the door upon them.

The last artifact of negativity in the open heart is the unforgiven universal self. You think you are serving all those you meet, and you are, but, in more advanced learning, you discover that you serve and are served with no breath between the two, that service is another way of saying praise or thanksgiving or intercession for forgiveness, and you begin working on the universal self within.

Now Q’uo said that our process of learning the truth of our being could be aided by meditation and contemplation so that we can open our hearts and see that we are a universal and archetypical being. They said this process is called initiation and involves solidifying a whole new pattern of being the self and disciplining the self, and as we focus on this true nature of our self each of our choices reveals the nature of our service to love the one Source that has created all that is. Q’uo went on to say that the process of initiation could be difficult and tedious, but it would help us to see the increased strength in being open-hearted and free because we have not yet had to deal with the negative possibilities within us beyond closing the door upon them. Then Q’uo said the last act of negativity in the open heart is the unforgiven universal self, and we begin to work on the universal self within us. On May 13, 1990, Q’uo explained the nature and purpose of initiation:

There are various stages that an entity will be available to pass through during an incarnation that are determined before the incarnation as general categories in which lessons shall be attempted. As an entity assesses the upcoming, shall we say, incarnation and the potentials for growth that it wishes to include it will survey the kind of transformations, or initiations, as they are often called, that will be necessary to undergo as a portion of the learning process, much as a student within your colleges would determine what courses of mathematics would be necessary in order to master that particular field of study.

There are also times during the incarnational experience that what you may call a plateau of another nature is reached, this being determined by the entity’s overall needs for some respite from the arduous journey. All journeys at some time tend to fatigue the pilgrim, for there are those times during which the steps are taken in directions that were not planned, that necessitate more expenditure of energy in order to learn the lessons of those steps than is readily available on a constant basis to the seeker. These plateaus are more obvious than are those initiations or transformations of which we had spoken previously. These, the initiations and transformations, more frequently occur in an unseen or unrecognized manner where the entity is totally immersed in some quality or distorted quality of its being as balance is attempted and attempted again and again until the transformation is complete.

Looking back upon the incarnation one may see times of difficulty and intensity as more likely having been the experience of such a time of transformation, during which time the entity may well have felt that there was no progress being made, and that indeed it would seem to the entity that it even moved backwards. The testing, as it were, however, transforms, and a new being moves forward.

Now that we have described the basic path as we feel it to be, we can zero in a bit upon the so-called “voices within.” Let us place them in three categories. Firstly, there are those voices within which are memories from very early times within this incarnation and sometimes having the feeling of experiences not limited to this incarnation. These voices of parents and those in the early world of incarnational time come plangently and persuasively across any number of years to tell you the first things that you heard regularly again and again. These voices may have been wise or unwise, or, as in most cases, a confusing mixture of acceptance and non-acceptance, of forgiveness and of punishment, of stability and abandonment, of security and insecurity. The tangle of emotions wells up within those who are parents, and the child remembers so well.

In this first category of voices within, the voices are often fairly easy to pick out, for you hear almost the voice of that early authority speaking. It is fairly clearly not your voice, although you allow it to be so. In this first category of voices, it is well to examine the thought welling up within you for any possible aid. And if there is no real justice, fairness, or help in this voice, it is well to remove it regularly and for a period of time by saying, “You are my mother; you are not me,” or whatever the entity and its relation to you is. These voices may be respected, but need to be taken very lightly, for now you are making these choices, and that voice speaks to a young child no longer in need of harsh measures of protection.

To allow these voices full sway is the equivalent of failing ever to pick up the matchbook when you are cold and could start a good bonfire on a forest journey because the father or mother said, “Do not use matches.” You are now in charge of your equipment for life. The use of any fire to warm body, soul, or spirit can be both helpful and destructive, so you must be careful in your choice. Yet, to fear to pick up the tool by which you create the light and warmth is to refuse to move further upon your path.

The second category of voices within is the category of, shall we say, the stray negativity which surrounds and envelops the third-density illusory experience which you call life. Within your density you are specifically guaranteed to be kept off-balance, continuously to encounter situations that baffle and confuse your mind and make it necessary to abandon the intellectual logic and move into the feelings of the heart wherein lies wisdom. There is always the illusion of more negativity by far than positivity, for in the illusion it is often so that loss and limitation cause the spiritual seeker in its pain to do more good work in consciousness than it does during easier times. The easy times, so-called, are seldom well used. May we say that many of those issues which have been brought up this day at this working are of this type.

When the time is fairly joyful, the spirits and will to serve are high. Within this period of experience many entities slack off in their spiritual work. Each of you is expressing an extremely good aspect of spiritual seeking by focusing in, for the purpose of learning, on those motifs that keep reappearing in the inner life that are exceptions to your basic joy. That you not stress these difficulties is good. That you realize them and respect their value enough to do work in the indigo ray or brow-level area is that which will bring you more sharply into the position of initiation where a new key, an enlarged realization of the clarity of the pattern of the self, may begin its process of transforming you by enlarging your stable point of view. We hope that each values these voices that are not parental but are those inner portions which observe the self and speak to the self of patterns not yet fully realized, not yet fully conceived.

You see the pattern by the incompleteness which moves into manifestation in conscious life as the “fly in the ointment,” the inner ambivalence, the something not quite comfortable. There need be none of this process, but, if there seems to be the need for some fear, then allow and accept that you have a concern, that there is something that makes you feel the negative rather than the positive. Allow this, for it is a part of the process. Only end always with the realization that the process is positive, and the resulting seeker—that is, you—will learn from this quiet, constant testing, not any large detail of spirit, but, rather, the undergirding patterns that support continued spiritual evolution.

As you evolve, the race which you are a part of evolves. You are all entities within your planetary sphere in that, as you evolve and are able reliably to be more of a clear, transparent channel for the infinite waters of love, so you shall be both less yourself and more yourself. You are attempting to move from the personal self to the magical or impersonal self, and these small voices within tell you of the pattern that you are just missing.

This is subtle work. Do not be discouraged, but move forward, and in forgiveness of self—not the forgiveness of one who may confer from the outside, but forgiveness of the universal self by the universal self. To serve love is truly freedom; yet, to perfect that freedom, you move into and through the large choices involved in opening the heart in non-judgmental compassion to the realization that beyond all these choices there is a universal nature which includes all things, and as All-Self there is forgiveness of the forever incomplete All-Self being perceived as becoming. The more you become, the more freely and gladly you will take on this subtle and essential task.

Here Q’uo said that they wanted to talk about the voices within us, and the first was those of our parents that are a confusing mixture of acceptance and non-acceptance, forgiveness and non-forgiveness, and these voices need to be respected but to be taken very lightly, for we are no longer the small child in need of such harsh protection. Then they said that the second voice is one that is confusing and baffles the intellectual mind and causes us to move into the wisdom of the heart in order to deal with difficult catalyst that gives us the opportunity to do good work in consciousness that easier times do not provide. Then Q’uo said that by doing work in the indigo ray we are experiencing the transformational nature of initiation that enlarges our stable point of view in a manner that is not parental in orientation, but which are inner portions of our selves which observe the self in patterns which are not yet fully realized. Q’uo went on to say that we may experience some fear in this transformational process, but we should accept it and continue to move forward with the knowledge that this is a positive experience from which we can learn the basic patterns of spiritual evolution. They said that this is the way that we become transparent channels of love and move from the personal self to the magical self, and when our All-Self can forgive our incomplete All-Self then we are in the process of becoming, and the more freely we will be able to take on this essential task of transformation. On January 6, 1991, Q’uo described the nature of spiritual evolution:

May you be blessed with help and aid. May you allow the blessing of that help and that aid, which is always available if you may allow the help. It is often help in disguise, but if you acknowledge it, it will make itself known to you. That is the nature of spiritual evolution. You will evolve as quickly and as painlessly as you allow yourself. The secret is the attention. Pay attention, each moment. Extend the meditative self until it encompasses each moment, and then in each moment that which is yours will come to you, and will make itself known clearly. We speak of that which is beyond the normal evolutionary pattern, but we speak in a way which we hope draws you onward in hunger and thirst for that which cannot perish, that which you are.

The third category of voices within is peopled by those presences to which you become sensitized. These are not, in your way of speaking, parts of the self. They seem to be people, entities, energies which are apart from you, which have their own lives, their own bodies, and their own thinking. It may be useful for you to think always of your inner guides or the Holy Spirit, or whatever you find to be your guidance. If that be so, then stop right there, for that is an excellent way to relate to these essences, these energies, these people. They truly are here to serve you as a seeker, to aid you in attaining that perfect clarity which lets the Creator shine through undiminished and undistorted.

There are, however, many who find it useful also to feel kinship with or to find themselves to be part of these presences. The way to consider them then might well be that there are energies, essences, and traits within yourself which draw and attract these entities, energies and so forth to you. It is well always if a new voice is heard—and all voices are new until challenged—to be clear about being in charge of either accepting these voices or requesting that they leave in no uncertain terms. If you find a portion of guidance—one of the guiding voices—to be destructive, then you must do that which is natural for you to do to remove that voice from the opportunity to speak further. To do this is a matter of knowing where your essence lies so that you can stand solidly upon the spiritual rock upon which you have placed your journey and say, “By this imperishable ideal which I take most seriously, I command you to go and stay gone.”

You are not without power. Your thoughts have power. But for them to be full of your true power you truly need to become clear within your heart about your choice of path, for there are many, many paths to the one infinite Creator. For instance, we are such a voice through this instrument. This instrument spent some of your time in moving carefully over its basic faith, its basic way of relating faith theoretical to life specific. This instrument challenges us in the name of Jesus the Christ, and because, to this instrument, Jesus the Christ is the way, the truth, and the life, we may then say to this instrument, “We come in the name of Jesus the Christ; Jesus is Lord.” We can say this because this is this instrument’s true heart. There is no equivocation. This instrument has chosen.

If you were to form your spiritual life upon conversations with your bedpost, we would have to come into harmony with what you and your bedpost conceived to be the way, the truth, and the life, and we would see that this bedpost had given you the energy to move into serious consideration of the infinite nature of your spirit. And for you and you alone, we would, silly as it may seem, need to come to you in the name you had given your bedpost. This is very simplistic. However, we are attempting to crash through the barriers of words to express that when you speak to guidance, you must test it.

And do not think that, because you know the energy of your guides, that they are necessarily your guides. There are negatively oriented, spiritually advanced entities who are excellent mimics, shall we say, who work with as much light as do your guides, and their guidance moves in to those who do not take care, first fooling the instrument with positive information, then gradually de-tuning the instrument, asking it to turn from imperishable ideals to specific dogmas and doctrines, be they obviously spiritual or tangentially so, as in thoughts about the diet and the ways of being healthy or unhealthy. Eventually, an untested voice may well become quite negative. This occurs only to those who are already listening to the silent wisdom of guidance. This protects those who have not moved to a magical point, a powerful point, in terms of the infinite spirit, the journeying seeker within; ignorance is truly bliss.

To each of you, more knowledge has meant more care, for as you become powerful, you attract attention. As you serve and create light and radiate love of the infinite One, you also cast an ever sharper shadow. You become harder upon yourself, setting yourself up for the forgiveness of the universal self. My beloved ones, know that this query is one asked by those who already love and are already upon the path. Know that you now are working with the discipline of your universal personality. You are beginning to set archetypical habits for yourself and building, ever more polarized, a channel for compassion.

As you do this work, we hope you have the light touch, the sense of humor, the ability to take yourself lightly, for attaining the keys to learning the correct and appropriate use of personal power is a long, long process. You have moved into an area that will be continued in your development for many, many incarnations, and through at least one more density. This situation of loving, serving, and trying to become the forgiving universal self, and, therefore, the forgiven universal self, is a sacred and a monumental task, and you are working in the all too dim light of inner work.

You now plumb the depths and wait for the flashes, rare though they are, of perfect realization. May you have faith in this process. May you help each other to bear the burdens and to meet the testings of this process. And may you see always before you the love that surrounds you, the support of that infinite love, and the utter clarity that is possible to achieve when once you have freely forgiven, forgiven, and forgiven.

Here Q’uo spoke of the third kind of inner voice which we could see as our inner guides or the Holy Spirit which help us to attain that perfect clarity that allows the Creator to shine through us in an undistorted way. Then Q’uo said that these inner voices were attracted to us by the nature of our being, but if we should hear a new voice within we would need to challenge it by the basic essence of our being to be sure that it was positively-oriented by saying: “By this imperishable ideal which I take most seriously, I command you to go and stay gone.” Q’uo went on to say that we should not think that we know the energy of our guides and have no need to challenge them because there are negative entities that can mimic our guides, give us positive information to begin with, and then move from eternal spiritual concepts to the dogma and doctrine of negativity. Then Q’uo said that as we gain more experience as channels, we attract this negative attention, but as we discipline our universal personality and develop archetypical habits we become more positively-polarized channels for compassion. Q’uo went on to say that we should remember to keep the light touch of humor on our journeys of learning the appropriate use personal power because this is a long journey that will continue into at least one more density. Q’uo completed their response by saying that we should help each other to become the forgiving universal self and also the forgiven universal self and to see the support of the infinite love that surrounds us and the clarity that is possible once we have forgiven, forgiven, and forgiven again. On September 20, 1992, Q’uo described the nature of the universal self:

We see the concept of the universal self as one which may bear some interest to you. When you receive a certain level of, shall we say, initiation or transformation a peculiar thing begins to occur. The self that has many, many details to concern the self with begins a little at a time to receive from the deeper mind—that part of the deeper mind which speaks consciously. You may have noticed the growing tendency of your own mind to have a kind of knee-jerk response in terms of how one looks at events and occurrences. Spontaneously, there begins to be a larger part of the self which sees each thing occurring as being part of an universal experience, that is, one common to all beings.

The universal self is all of you, yet you are the universal self alone. You are holy and profane, you are as much a mystery as is the Creator. Your mystery and your service may be contained, convenient and finite, or you may choose the high road of attempting to universalize modes of perception so that you move more and more into an acceptance of that which the mind brings. Full and loving action in the face of circumstance is your path of service. Each is on that path. Sudden changes take place in such paths and the scenery changes. As long as the attention is kept upon the will of the infinite One whatever service lies before you will feel most blessed.

We know that we have spoken overlong, and this instrument has been very formidable in her disapproval; however, this was a subtle query, and we could not leave it until we had said at least our outline. We thank you for allowing us to keep you in this circle, and at this time, if there are any queries that you wish to raise, we would answer them. However, we find that this instrument is very willing to transfer this contact to the one known as Jim, and, therefore, we shall take this opportunity to thank this instrument and transfer. We are known to you as the principle of Q’uo.

This morning I transplanted the flats of dahlias, snapdragons, and begonias into the flower garden in the middle of the Moss Garden. Then I transplanted the ageratum into the Ruins Mound between the house and the garage.

This afternoon I went back to my neighbor’s house and cleaned the tiny fishpond container and the rounded stones that I put in the bottom of the container. Then I hooked up the small pump to the little fish fountain, and completed the job.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 24

To Your Heart’s Health

I am of the consciousness of Jesus the Christ. I greet you in the midst of paradise, where love abounds, and light never fails. So it is within your heart. Love abounds and light never fails.

All souls have what you may call a dark side. There are things that lay heavy upon the soul. There are thoughts of past and thoughts of future. And in this heaviness, in this past and this future, the joyful present is lost within your heart and your soul.

Look at the good that comes to you today. Be quiet and sure and aware ahead of time that good shall come to you. Expect it. And if that which you get is unexpectedly difficult, search out the love that you are to learn and express for Jesus the Christ.

Let this be for you a day of rejoicing; a day of moving into the love of the Creator; a day lost in praise of Jesus the Christ.

There are those of you who do not wish to reckon with Jesus the Christ. We of the spirit of the full consciousness of love suggest only that you need not reckon with the entity Jesus, but to your heart’s health and your soul’s life, you must reckon with Christhood. Gaze at the story of the man and grasp the meaning and the implications of living the full consciousness of love.

When you have done so, do not despair but rejoice, for we are with you always.

Our peace and love be with you now and evermore. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from August 16, 1992:

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. At this time we would offer ourselves in the responding to any further queries which those present would have for us. Is there a query at this time?

Carla: I have a question. Could you tell me what happened? I was channeling, and then suddenly Jim pulled the microphone away from me, and so I assumed I came to a dead stop. What happened?

I am Q’uo. I am aware of your query and your confusion, my sister. We were unable to bring your level of consciousness up to a sufficient degree away from that level you call sleep, so that we were of necessity bound to complete that portion of our message through your instrument. We can assure you that you did not stop and could have continued if we had wished to infringe upon your free will by utilizing the trance state. Since we had no prior agreement with you to utilize the trance level of communication, we found it necessary to give a summary of that information which we had been transmitting through your instrument and then transferred our contact to this instrument in order that questions and answers could be entertained, as is the practice of this group in its relationship to us.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Carla: Yes, Q’uo, could you please speak to me what I did incorrectly, to bring about this situation. This has not happened before.

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, my sister. We find no error upon your part. Only the body’s response to the opportunity for rest as it is suffering of that which you call the infection, which has weakened it significantly, and we applaud your desire to serve under these conditions, and that which occurred is not unusual in this instance. Therefore, we do not suggest any corrective action or further concern upon your part.

In these first two questions Carla is asking Q’uo what had just happened when she was channeling Q’uo, and then it seemed to her that I had pulled the microphone away from her. At the beginning of this session those of Q’uo felt it was necessary to deepen Carla’s state of meditation in order to use her more effectively as an instrument as they said here:

Greetings, my friends. We are known to you as those of Q’uo. We greet each of you in the Love and in the Light of the one infinite Creator whose property is to be infinite, invisible, everlasting, and intelligent. We greet you in the Love and in the Light of this everlasting intelligence because that is all that there is, Love and manifestation. Love in a manifestation built with Light. We ask you to pause momentarily as we wish to take this instrument to a deeper level, so that we may speak more clearly through this instrument. We shall pause for a moment. We are those of the principle of Q’uo.

Then most of the rest of Carla’s channeling of Q’uo was done in this deeper state of meditation until at the end of the session when Q’uo saw that Carla was in trance, which they felt was an abridgement of her free will as they would need an agreement with her to use the trance state before doing so, so they continued by summarizing their thoughts and transferring their contact to me as they said here:

Again, we shall pause as we find this instrument going to sleep. We shall bring the level up a bit. Please allow our apologies for another pause. We are Q’uo.

[Pause]

We are again with this instrument. We cannot wake this instrument up. Therefore, we feel it best to speak only a bit longer. For while this instrument is perfectly safe, we wish not to intrude upon this instrument’s free will. And as we are in trance with this instrument, she has no free will. This constitutes an unacceptable contact, for we believe above all things in the free will of each individual and would not speak our thoughts to any which did not ask. Nor would we enter into the trance state with an instrument without the prior agreement. Therefore, we simply will sum what we have said and then transfer.

Is there another query, my sister?

Carla: Yes, a last one. Is there a desire, is there a need in your opinion for any, let’s say, series of special sessions in trance, such as we have done before, or is conscious channeling that which the Confederation prefers at this time, through me?

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, my sister. We do not recommend the utilization of the trance level of contact for your instrument at this time but would continue with the conscious channeling as you have called it.

In 69.18, Ra also said that it was not a good idea for Carla to go into the trance state unless she was in a session with Ra:

Questioner: This instrument performs services on Sunday night channeling other members of the Confederation. We are reluctant to continue this because of the possibility of her slipping into trance and being offered the services of the negatively polarized adept. Are there any safeguards to create a situation where she cannot go into trance other than at a protected working such as this one?

Ra: I am Ra. There are three. Firstly, the instrument must needs improve the disciplined subconscious taboo against requesting Ra. This would involve daily conscious and serious thought. The second safeguard is the refraining from the opening of the instrument to questions and answers for the present. The third is quite gross in its appearance but suffices to keep the instrument in its physical complex. The hand may be held.

Is there another query, my sister?

Carla: No, Q’uo, thank you very much. I appreciate it.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you again, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

Carla: I do have one more before you stop. Do you wish to speak upon this subject again, to finish what you had to say?

I am Q’uo, and we find that as with all topics [laughter from Carla] there is an infinite amount of information available. At your request we feel that we have given a good beginning upon this topic, one which offers each food for thought shall we say, and we shall be happy to speak further if it is requested of us.

Is there another query, my sister?

Carla: No, Q’uo. And I thank you and am glad to talk with you as usual.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

Questioner: I have a query. First of all, are you familiar with my… inquiry or… ah, earlier what I was speaking of as an experience which I had in California in which I…

[Side one of tape ends.]

I am Q’uo, and am again with this instrument. We are aware of the information which you shared with this group, my sister, but do not choose to read further before you have given information, for we do not wish to infringe upon any entity’s free will and therefore will respond only to this information which you have spoken and to which you wish further response. How may we speak, my sister?

Questioner: My query has to do with… getting in touch with… whether this is something with which I might continue or should continue?

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, my sister. Our response, in order to assure your free will in its action, is of necessity general. We may suggest that, if there is an interest in this kind of information and its method of transfer that indeed you may pursue this type of seeking. We would suggest that if there is a question or doubt upon your part that this is a topic upon which meditation would be helpful. For those areas of inquiry, which are of value to the seeker, will cause a feeling of rightness to rise from the subconscious to the conscious mind where it will become apparent that the next step upon the path is the one in question.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: I feel the doubt is only in my own ability, because there is definitely a desire and an interest in pursuing this.

I am Q’uo, and we would respond by suggesting that it is appropriate that each seeker feel a certain amount of doubt as it approaches a new experience upon the spiritual path. For this kind of doubt or questioning is that which prepares the seeker in an inner sense to take the step from the cliff not knowing whether the foot that steps shall rest upon firm fundament or not. Thus, if there is interest upon your heart and doubt in your ability, we recommend that you rely upon that desire which you feel and that you put aside for the moment the doubt in order that your journey may continue along that path which is designated by the passion and desire within you. Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: No further query, and I thank you.

I am Q’uo and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

[Pause]

I am Q’uo, and as it appears that we have completed those queries which have formed in the minds of those that are present, we shall take this opportunity to thank each entity for inviting our presence in this session of working. We are most grateful to be able to join you and to walk briefly with you upon your journeys of seeking. We applaud each entity’s efforts at moving through this illusion which is filled with mystery and confusion, for it is a valiant effort which you make within such a heavy chemical illusion.

Each has friends, guides, and teachers that walk with each, whether seen or unseen. And we can assure each of you that you are never alone upon this path though each will feel a loneliness many times during the journey. Each time you are calling inwardly or outwardly for assistance, your calls are heard, and if you will listen carefully with your inner ear, you will hear the response, for the one Creator cares for each of Its children and hears each call. We shall take our leave of this group at this time, leaving each as always in the love and in the light of the infinite Creator. We are known to you as those of Q’uo. Adonai, my friends. Adonai.

This morning I used the sprinkler to water the flowers that I have transplanted in the Flower Fall Mound and then in the Wuthering Heights Mound. Then I used the watering wand to water the flowers along the parking area in front of the house. Then I went over to Thieneman’s Nursery and bought some snapdragons, dahlias, and a couple of other flats of flowers that I could not find a name for them, and I hope to begin transplanting them in the Ruins Mound between the house and the garage tomorrow morning.

This afternoon I returned to my neighbor’s house and worked at cleaning out the tiny fish pond and getting the large stones arranged at the head of the pond to look like a large mountain cliff overlooking a lake below.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 23

The Holy Vibration

I am the spirit of the full consciousness of love. I greet you in the name of Jesus the Christ.

For the spiritually oriented seeker, names are very important. For the breath that is the spirit of love molds itself into vibrations which have a profound effect upon the creature which, though physical, has resonances with the metaphysical self in its analog.

That is to say that the name of the Lord of your life has the vibration of strength for you. Thus the name of Jesus, though not the earthly name, Jehoshua, nevertheless bears the strongest vibratory significance to the instinctual, creaturely self which resonates with the analogous spiritual body which is the spiritual body incorruptible.

Know that the breath of the spirit is breathed into you as you think upon holy names and is breathed from you as you consciously vibrate words of love which are meaningful to those whom you wish to love and serve.

We leave you upon the holy vibration of peace, now and forever. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. The Q’uo quote today comes from August 16, 1992:

The question this afternoon has to do with the concept of releasing our mental plans and control enough in our lives in order to either in general channel a life and be in the moment and experience the moment as fully as we can for what it has to offer us, or in some cases to specifically be able to verbally channel from other sources, our higher selves or perhaps guides or other entities that would wish to communicate information of spiritual evolutionary value to us. What would be your recommendation as to how we can be enough in the moment to be able to do any kind of channeling that we wish whether that would be to channel a life, a relationship, a job, or a message from another entity?

(Carla channeling)

Greetings, my friends. We are known to you as those of Q’uo. We greet each of you in the Love and in the Light of the one infinite Creator whose property is to be infinite, invisible, everlasting, and intelligent. We greet you in the Love and in the Light of this everlasting intelligence because that is all that there is, Love and manifestation. Love in a manifestation built with Light. We ask you to pause momentarily as we wish to take this instrument to a deeper level, so that we may speak more clearly through this instrument. We shall pause for a moment. We are those of the principle of Q’uo.

[Pause]

I am Q’uo, and we are again with this instrument. Again, we greet you in Love and in Light. It is our great privilege to be called to this circle of seeking to speak upon the question you have posed. Indeed we are with your peoples for this purpose alone, and you give us the precious gift of an opportunity for us to serve and to learn. For we in our density also have lessons to learn. Ours are those of wisdom, whereas yours are those of the student learning to love and be loved. We ask you to realize firmly that we are prone to error, not great or exalted, but pilgrims upon the dusty road of spiritual seeking. You seek an accelerated pace of spiritual evolution. All beings evolve; that is their destiny. It is within each seeker’s control to choose the rate of learning and the rate of changing or transforming. We happily share our thoughts with you; but use your discrimination. Any thought that you find not to be useful, we ask you to discard it. For you will not learn from us. We are only the catalyst for you to remember your personal truth. Thus, take only those thoughts of ours which you recognize and feel “Yes, I knew that. I only forgot!”

All in third density begin with a vast forgetting, then see only those things which are visible, hear only those sounds which the ear may transmit to the brain—and so forth through the senses. Your physical vehicle was designed to deal with this illusion, this grand illusion, this carnival which passes in third density for reality. However, at the very heart of all that is visible is both metaphysical and physical awareness that nothing can be truly understood in its larger terms. That is, telescopes show to the eye that which the eye cannot see, yet those scientists which use those telescopes always stress how much more there is beyond the limits of their measuring devices. Similarly, as the microscope becomes more and more powerful, it begins to see smaller and smaller particles.

The cyclotron throws the atom, seeking the sight of the first particle which has mass. Yet, we hear from these scientists that only the path of energy of these electrons can be documented. Mass itself can not. This is because all things are created by Light, by the revolutions and buildings of revolutions of the unit of Light, called the photon, which has never yielded any suggestion of mass—only the wave of energy. Your illusion is perfect. It offers you that which you need to act out the learning which you came to this lifetime to receive.

You are old, old souls and you have given yourself your own choices of those relationships and environments which you feel will give you the most opportunity for learning. This is done by the friction of difficulty and trouble, frustration and other seemingly negative reactions, those things which trip up the attention and move your consciousness off the balance upon which you walk, balancing the various positive and negative catalyst which you receive so that you may work with this catalyst and at your own pace continue the evolution of spirit. The evolution of third-density physical vehicles is at its end. Further evolution is all spiritual.

The group question for this session was: What would be your recommendation as to how we can be enough in the moment to be able to do any kind of channeling that we wish whether that would be to channel a life, a relationship, a job, or a message from another entity? Q’uo began their response by saying that in the third density we go through a great forgetting, and our physical body uses its five senses to perceive very little accurately in either the physical or metaphysical in terms of the nature of reality. Q’uo continued by saying that neither telescopes nor microscopes can show us the nature of reality from the larger or smaller perspective, and the cyclotron can only show us the path of the electron and not its mass because all things are created by Light where the photon has no mass but only a wave of energy, so our illusion is perfect for us to learn what we have come into incarnation to learn. Then Q’uo said that we are old souls who have come to learn through the catalyst of difficulties with relationships and places, and we seek to balance these positive and negative experiences so that the evolution of our spirit may be obtained. They said that when the evolution the of third-density body is at its end then all evolution is spiritual. On October 22, 1989, Q’uo said that all evolution is spiritual:

You are working upon your evolution, and from third density forward all evolution is spiritual. Thusly, we would back up and look at how one may abide in faith, and have the patience, the persistence, and the faith to wait and do what there comes before the face to do. That, and that alone, for that instant, is all that is needed. It is never known to you when you have truly succeeded and when you have failed, nor is it important, for if you do anything for the love of the one infinite Creator, that radiant thought, however poorly the actions manifest, is a purely positive, loving, and caring thought, and will add to the consciousness and the lightness of your sphere.

It is written by one who was close to the master known as Christ through vision that you should look not at those things that are seen but at those things that are unseen. For those things which are seen are temporal, while those things which are not seen are eternal. Let us look at this thought, spoken by the one known as Paul, the Apostle. When you wish to work with spiritual evolution, you take that which is before you, say a mismatched relationship apparently or a great chasm betwixt boss and employee. There is a tendency to focus upon the physical, chronologically arranged events which have caused the disharmonious feeling of being swept off of balance, of being tumbled by lies.

It is much more difficult to look for the heart of the dilemma. To gaze not at the topology and chronology of the disharmony but rather to penetrate the illusion to move by faith alone through the veil of forgetting. And to, by faith, ask for help from the world of the spiritual on the level of those things which are not seen. The workings of the heart are not seen. The self-acceptance or lack of it is not seen. The love or hunger for love in relationships is not seen. Circumstances only are seen. There is, my friends, a reason for this. The design is to so baffle, frustrate and confuse the intellect with all the data of the senses that the student will be forced to move the center of investigatory energy from the intellectual mind, which is a creature of this illusion only, to the wisdom of the deep mind, which is vastly more informed, and which resides in what you would call the heart energy center. This center is the gateway center wherein, when the lower energies have been cleared, the gate becomes opened so that you can effectively focus the heart’s wisdom upon the situation you wish balanced within you.

Each of you is aware that it is well to keep the mind’s eye upon the moment which is now. And many are those who feel guilty that they do not spend more of your time in the meditation, contemplation, prayer, and simple reading of inspirational material that has been valued by you. The world, you say, is so much with me I cannot do these things which take too much time.

We ask each to release the self from this judgmental frame of mind and firstly to realize that there is no physical time to seeking but only the energy of intention and desire. Secondly, that this can be called upon at any moment during which you are aware enough of how to judge and discriminate to choose what to look at. This meditation of the moment is not a will-o’-the-wisp. It is the dipping into the deep pool of peace in a moment, so that you may turn again and face the illusion without being drowned and overwhelmed by the information pouring in from your senses. Your body’s mind would, if it could, speak only of the illusion. Thusly, it is only by conscious choice of the point of view that you may have the option of looking at what forces shaped the situation at the present moment.

Now Q’uo said that when we experience any difficulties with another person we should not look at the surface of appearance but should look at that which is unseen as a solution to the difficulties and use our faith to penetrate the veil of forgetting and access the wisdom of our heart that is accessible when the lower energy centers have been cleared. Then Q’uo said that most seekers know that it is well to stay centered in the present moment, but they feel guilty that they don’t utilize meditation, contemplation, prayer, or reading spiritually inspired information to do so. They said that we should not judge ourselves for this but, instead, to set our intentions to do so whenever the time is right for us. They suggested meditation as that which gives us the ability to look at the forces which have shaped the disharmony of the present moment. On January 11, 1998, Q’uo spoke of the value of meditation in dealing with disharmony:

As one has gathered about one all the various confusions, experiences, communications and so forth one draws certain tentative conclusions about how best to respond within the incarnation in order to determine how to find and share those qualities of love, of light, of harmony, of service, and so forth. Within the meditative state these tentative conclusions and experiences may seat themselves in a manner which allows their influence to have its sway within the total being. One is able to more clearly make sense of one’s experiences by allowing a certain kind of settling out to occur, and for the allowing of inspiration to make its natural response as one considers the events of the day, allows them to have their weight and go their way, and then finds the sitting and the listening to the one Creator to produce an inspiration, a motivation, or simply a recognition. It is in meditation that the confusion and distraction begin to fall away and the foundation of one’s being begins to be revealed and becomes more accessible to the entity in the daily round of activities when found in meditation.

This, my friends, is not a theoretical training ground for soul! This, your third-density illusion, is boot camp for souls! You see, in third density you have one choice to make. It is the choice between service to the self and service to others. Upon this choice depends millions, of what you think of as years, of future evolution. For both the service-to-self path and the service-to-others path are viable ways to become one with the one Creator which is the source of all that there is, and indeed is all that there is.

Again, we shall pause as we find this instrument going to sleep. We shall bring the level up a bit. Please allow our apologies for another pause. We are Q’uo.

[Pause]

We are again with this instrument. We cannot wake this instrument up. Therefore, we feel it best to speak only a bit longer. For while this instrument is perfectly safe, we wish not to intrude upon this instrument’s free will. And as we are in trance with this instrument, she has no free will. This constitutes an unacceptable contact, for we believe above all things in the free will of each individual and would not speak our thoughts to any which did not ask. Nor would we enter into the trance state with an instrument without the prior agreement. Therefore, we simply will sum what we have said and then transfer.

Whether in channeling or in living, the focus upon the principles governing that which occurs rather than on that which seems to be occurring will yield to you the more accurate point of view from which to use your personal powers of discrimination and choices of action, so that you stop reacting to the illusion and begin the freer and more transforming activity of acting as you believe in the present moment to be your deepest understanding. This process is guarded by the One who loves you very, very much. The protection of the seeker is grounded in Love. You are loved infinitely, and you are channels for infinite Love.

Here Q’uo said that the third density is the density of choice between service to others and service to self, and upon the making of this choice depends millions of years of evolution because both of these paths lead to the one Creator. Then Q’uo said that we should focus on the principles that are occurring in channeling or in living our lives rather that which seems to be occurring so that we may stop reacting to the illusion and start acting in the way that is our deepest understanding. Q’uo completed their reply by saying that this process is guarded by the One and that loves us infinitely, and we are channels for infinite Love. On June 29, 1988, Hatonn said that we all can become channels for love and light:

In third density, that which you enjoy now, you are learning to experience using time. In time, there is the capacity to either intensify what one thinks or to disperse what one thinks, to intensify a feeling or to disperse a feeling. In time there is the making of choices, the finding of one’s own passion, one’s own heart, one’s own true ground of reality. It’s not an easy task, for emotions must be purified to a certain extent and the will brought to bear upon the desired object. Those who wish to be channels for love and light, regardless of what their service to others is, need to feed the intensity of their love for the Creator, need to allow time to feel the intensity of the Creator’s love for each of Its creations.

We thank this group for allowing us to speak, and we thank this instrument and would now transfer to the one known as Jim. We leave this instrument in love and in light. We are Q’uo.

This morning I made a trip to The Home Depot to buy a small piece of plexiglass, and when I got back home I used packing tape to tape it to a tear in the screen on the outside of the living room window just below the bird feeder. Sometimes birds and squirrels will come through the tear to eat bird seed there, and the squirrels can get back out, but turtle doves can’t, and I have had to rescue them a few times by taking them to the back deck and tossing them into the air.

This afternoon I went over to a neighbor’s house and did a couple of jobs that she asked if I could help her with. The first was to cut down the dead tall grass stalks with my hedge clippers. The second was to clean out a tiny fish pond that I installed for her about 15 years ago when I had my lawn service. The old plastic pond is beyond repair, so she will have to order another one, and I will install it when she does.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 22

The Waterfall

I am of the principle of Jesus the Christ, and I greet you in the full consciousness of love divine.

There is a waterfall that streams from infinity, its sparkling rainbow cascades invisible to the eye but full of healing and health, nourishment, and nutrition for the spirit.

This cascade flows wherever there is consciousness. And the love that surrounds you is there because you are loved. This day, allow the consciousness of that love to fill you, that all that you do, you may do for the love of Jesus Christ. Have you the chores, the small tasks, the seemingly unimportant dusting and paperwork and foolishness of that sort? Do it for the love of Jesus the Christ. Do all for the love of the Creator.

Then shall the waterfall of love be answered by your love. Then shall the waterfall move into you and through you to bless the world anew. For only the created can express the uncreated light that is the waterfall of divine love. Feel it surround you. Express it within you. Allow it to flow through you. And do all that you do for the love of the Christ.

We leave you in the consciousness of its peace, now and always. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from July 19, 1992:

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and in light through this instrument. At this time it is our privilege to offer ourselves in the capacity of attempting to speak to any further queries which those present may have to offer us. Is there a query with which we may begin?

Questioner: Yes, I have a query. Is channeling—the way Carla and Jim do that here—is this something for everyone, is this the way of the future, or is this something that derives out of the desire upon the entity [inaudible] to do?

I am Q’uo, and we are aware of your query, my sister. Each seeker upon the path of truth seeks that which is most helpful upon the journey, and by far the greater number of seekers is that kind of seeker which you would call unaware that there is a journey, and these entities utilize the daily round of activities in a sense which is less efficient, shall we say, but more filled with the mystery of the journey, and these entities utilize that which circumstance provides as they attempt to find a sense and a center to the life pattern.

Those seekers who are conscious of the journey and who place themselves there in faith and in love utilize tools, methods, and teachers which are drawn to them according to the manner in which they seek, some finding great comfort in the process which you have called the channeling and which we at this time partake in. This kind of catalyst is of an unusual nature in relation to the great number of alternate…

[Side one of tape ends.]

(Jim channeling)

We are again with this instrument. We shall continue.

The unusual nature of the channeling process makes this kind of method of seeking difficult for some to utilize and makes it more attractive for others, for there is much notoriety which has been associated with this phenomenon through much of your recent past. We find as we observe those not only within this circle of seeking but the great number of conscious seekers upon your planetary sphere that the movement into the utilization of channeled information has as its natural continuation the opening of each seeker’s channel for finding the personal and internal sources of information so that each seeker is more nearly an instrument of a purified and rarefied nature, which is to say that all catalyst—such as channeling, astrology, tarot, numerology and so forth—serves as an intermediary for a certain portion of time for the seeker. Thence there is the movement towards refining that channel which is ever and always available to all seekers, for each entity upon your planet channels the life, channels the responses, the activities, the words, the thoughts, and so forth. This channeling of the life then provides the basis by which each entity may refine this movement of energy and inspiration through the life pattern.

Thus, we would respond in short to your query by suggesting that channeling as a life endeavor and as a personal process is far more important than is the channeling in which we now engage, for we wish to serve as catalyst, and as each seeker channels his or her own journey there is where the treasures are truly found.

Questioner asked if the channeling process that was being used in this session by Carla and Jim was something that all people would one day be able to accomplish, or was it dependent upon each person’s desire to do so? Q’uo replied by saying that most seekers were unaware of the nature of their spiritual journey and were simply trying to make sense of their lives, but those seekers who were aware of their spiritual journey used personal and internal tools to pursue it that might include channeling, numerology, astrology, or the use of the tarot. Then Q’uo said that all seekers are actually channels for their lives, activities, and thoughts, and that this type of channeling is far more important than the channeling that was occurring in the circle today. On March 15, 2023, Q’uo said that everyone channeled their life experiences:

You asked this evening about the qualities of self-doubt, of apprehension and anxiety about how one performs, in this particular case, the service of channeling, and in general how self-doubt might be utilized by any seeker of truth, whether a channel as is each here, or one who simply channels the life experience and confronts difficulties in the perception of the self in being able to manage one’s feelings about oneself as one is pursuing whatever goal or intention one feels is most important in the life path, for you all are channels. You all channel your life experience, your thoughts, your desires, your needs, your feelings; and whether you are a channel of the vocal type, which is experienced tonight, or one who tries to channel the life, it is important to realize self-doubt is a part of any spiritual seeker’s journey.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: No, thank you.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query?

Carla: I have one. I was surprised a little bit, even though I was the one channeling—when we talked about the question beforehand, I had thought to myself that there is probably going to be some channeling on, oh, just surrender to that which was required of one or desired of one by the infinite Creator, just a faith in that, and I was sort of surrendering to faith instead of trying to work with things, and I noticed that in talking about how to deal with this particular question there wasn’t any talk of surrender. It was really pretty well focused on the ways and means that we can work within our own minds and our own parts. I wonder if you can speak to that.

I am Q’uo, and I am aware of your query, my sister. As we spoke on the query for this session of working we observed that each entity present was well aware of the value of the surrendering to the undeniable circumstance, for each has journeyed long upon the path and has felt the force and momentum of the daily round of activities, so that the need to surrender to that which seems inevitable and right is obvious to each. We wish, therefore, to build upon the concepts of action considered in the light of surrender, for all activities that you accomplish within your life pattern are of a nature where there is a necessity for interaction of some kind. The conscious seeker of truth will wish to give the effort that is of the highest quality, reflecting the essence of its deepest being and wishes, to know how to form the response that is loving, intelligent and flexible in any situation.

Thus, we spoke to activity and response as those means whereby entities may gather their resources, shall we say, and utilize them to the fullest within the boundaries of the illusion in which you move, and with the recognition that the surrendering heart and mind are the attitudinal components, shall we say, by which all such activity may be accomplished. Thus we thought to provide the paradox how one may act with the attitude of surrender.

Carla asked about the group question of surrendering to the retrograde moments in one’s life and wondered why there wasn’t more talk of surrendering to the moment in faith or to the will of the Creator. Q’uo responded by saying that each member of the group this day was already aware of the concept of the need to surrender, so Q’uo spoke upon the concept of the highest kind of action that is taken that reflects its deepest desires of the heart and the mind and utilize them to the fullest within the boundaries of the illusion. On October 17, 2009, Q’uo spoke of the value of seeking our deepest desires:

Rest in the web of love that surrounds you and be infinitely curious as you witness this life. You came here to create, according to your desires, that which you wished. Therefore, shape your desires to match your deepest self, and the deepest desires of which you are aware. And seek always to go deeper, to learn more and to become freed to be attentive to the present moment.

For the present moment is that marvelous point of connection between eternity and the physical illusion. It is in the very present moment, as you apprehend it, that awareness can expand, that the answers can be found, that the door can be opened when you knock. Thusly, attempt to stay, as the one known as B said, in the present. There is the paydirt. There is that which you seek. There is the service, and there is the learning. And let your knowledge of yourself and your acceptance of yourself grow organically as does your path of service.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Carla: Let me just sum up and have you say “Yes, you have an understanding” or “No, you don’t.” You say that it is the living of a life in faith or the attempt to live a life in faith which is continuous surrender that enables one to raise the question “How can I best find honesty and acceptance in my personal interrelationships?” Would that be a fair summary of what you just said?

I am Q’uo. Not only would we suggest that is a fair summary, but an eloquent one.

Is there a further query at this time?

Carla: No, you old charmer, thank you very much. Q’uo, it’s a pleasure to talk to you.

I am Q’uo, and I thank you, my sister. Is there another query?

[Pause]

I am Q’uo, and as we assess the energies and lack of queries at this moment we feel that we have spoken for the appropriate length of your time, and we thank each entity for providing us with the desire to know that which we have to offer and with the patience to listen to what we are aware has been a somewhat lengthy discourse. We are always grateful for the opportunity to speak to this group and to any group which seeks so wholeheartedly for the love and light that will illuminate the journey yet one step further. We cannot express our gratitude enough to each present. We thank you, my brothers and sisters, and we shall take our leave of this group at this time, leaving each, as always, in love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are known to you as those of Q’uo. Adonai, my friends. Adonai.

This morning Anna and I synchronized our computers and listened to Carla channel those of Ra while being able to see the words she was channeling at the same time. We listened to Sessions 25 and 26 and enjoyed sharing thoughts about the concepts being discussed between Ra and Don.

This afternoon I cleaned Benny’s upstairs living space with the carpet sweeper for the rug in the hall. Then I swept up the kitty litter in her room. Then I used the dust mop to clean all three rooms. Then I went over to Thieneman’s Nursery and bought another tray of double impatiens, four more coral bells, and a flat of petunias.  When I got home I transplanted the double impatiens and coral bells into the Wuthering Heights Mound in the back yard and the petunias to the four pots on the corners of the fish pond. And that completes the transplanting work in the front yard.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 21

Lovers Before The Holy Spirit

I am of the principle of the full consciousness of love, and I greet you as the living Word of the most high.

Know ye that men and women alike are as lovers before the Holy Spirit, to be impregnated with the divine, that, within illusion, manifestation of the creative renewal of the infinite love of Jesus the Christ may take place.

Sexuality is seen only as its gross aspect by most who live the earthly life. Yet there is enormous polarity betwixt the pilgrim and the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is not nurturer alone but impregnator, that each pilgrim may be full of that which is born of the spirit and not of flesh.

Know that you may carry the living Word, the Christed consciousness that was and is and always shall be with and in Jesus the Christ. And embrace, as lovers, that life-giving love of the heavenly seeds within.

We leave you in the expectant peace of all who await the spirit of the living Christ, now and ever. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from July 19, 1992:

The question this afternoon has to do with how we accept those retrograde moments when the world around us does not seem to respond in a way in which we would either want it to or expect it to—whether it is a desire we have to control a situation and make it come out the way we think would be favorable; or relate to another person in a way we think is most harmonious, and yet the person or the situation does not seem to allow us to do that; or when we wish to live according to our highest ideals but find ourselves falling short, and we tend to make ourselves feel guilty because we have not done that which we feel is within our capability to do. How do we deal with our own feelings of falling short, how do we accept the moments when we are in the midst of anguish, and what is the most effective way of handling these moments where we find disharmony within ourselves or another and we feel that we have been responsible for that.

(Carla channeling)

I am Q’uo. Greetings to each of you in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are gratified to be called to this session of working and especially greet the one known as C and the one known as J, who have not been with this group for some of your time. We are honored to offer our humble opinions on the topic of some of the balancing of relationships appropriate to those seeking polarity in service to others, and ask only that you be aware that our opinions are prone to distortions, as are all opinions. We therefore ask each to use the inner discrimination in evaluating our suggestions and thoughts; we would prefer you to forget that which we said rather than attempt to accept an opinion of ours that did not feel right for you personally, for you and you alone recognize your own truth and we would not put a stumbling block before any.

We shall begin the consideration of the balanced and non-controlling handling or treatment of seemingly disharmonious situations with some suggestions for consideration. We suggest that you retreat in mode of thought from the conscious self that sits in this circle, retreat until you have gained a stance outside of your circumstances, outside of your personal conditions in life, and gaze at the phenomenal illusion which you incarnated to enjoy and are enjoying. See that distance between that which phenomenally occurs and the way you construe in thought formations those many things which have risen in the phenomenal world. There is, shall we say, a world of difference between the two. We suggest that in your considerations and from this stance of increased objectivity you look at the long process that is long in description though seemingly very, very quick in your time, that proceeds from the original sensations by the physical body and its senses of the phenomena that are arising and the thought formation.

Many, many things arise in each moment. Feel with your senses now the sense of touch responding to the slight breeze of the fan, the pressure of gravity upon you as you sit in meditation, the comfort and discomfort of the position held. Listen, there are vehicles moving at a distance from this dwelling, there is the drone of the fan, the calling of a bird and so many other small sounds, even those within your own body. Follow this thought through the senses not covered by sight, through the sense of smell, the sense of taste. All of these sense impressions are thrown at you moment by moment, millions and millions of bits of information, ninety-nine percent of which you automatically tune out because they do not impinge upon your needs for survival, for comfort, for courtesy, or for those other qualities that you have prioritized in your own programs of what you will pay attention to.

We suggest that each thought that is formed within you is in actuality the result of many, many calculations based upon sense impressions largely ignored, the one percent of sense impressions remaining being distorted by the somewhat biased attitude of each seeker, including yourself, towards the issues of survival, personal comfort, and so forth. When put in this way it may not seem outrageous for us to say that in a very substantial way your thought formations are not experience but recent memory, not that which is occurring but the carefully worked out summary and recapitulation of that which has occurred.

As each knows, when four people witness a traumatic event there will be four different versions of what occurred. They will agree on some points and disagree on others. Those instances wherein there is disharmony between people, part of the disharmony lies in the basic distance between the arising and dissolving of phenomena and the arising and dissolving of thought formation. That which you sense is not that which you live. In some we are suggesting the consideration that life and the experience of living is a story which you tell to yourself. Even in the most clear minded, quiet and objective individual this will hold true to some extent, therefore, that feeling of absolute surety that is the basis of righteous indignation and certainty of various kinds is, though useful and sometimes needed, also less than completely accurate, for if life is a story told to the self then there is the haunting knowledge that all thought formations coming into your mind are already biased.

The group question for this session was: How do we deal with our own feelings of falling short; how do we accept the moments when we are in the midst of anguish; and what is the most effective way of handling these moments where we find disharmony within ourselves or another, and we feel that we have been responsible for that? Q’uo began their reply by saying that when we find ourselves in a disharmonious situation we should move back from it to find an objective point of view that reveals the difference between what is occurring and how we see it. Then Q’uo said that we are inundated with sense impressions each moment, most of which we will ignore, and the one percent which we pay attention to is usually distorted by our attitudes towards survival and personal comfort. Q’uo went on to say that different people will see a traumatic event in different ways, and this difference of opinion can cause disharmony since each person is living a life story that they have told to themselves, which is already biased by their thoughts. On June 8, 1986, Carla and Yom discussed how difficult it is to have an objective point of view:

Carla: Only in noting that in my own experience, the hardest entity to unshroud the mystery of is myself because I don’t have the objective point of view that other people do. I wonder if that’s a common experience?

Yom: I am Yom, and, indeed, this experience is shared by all within your third-density illusion, for the catalyst of thoughts, words and deeds that move through your being is colored in a unique fashion by your own pre-incarnative programming. Thus, what has charge in the emotional sense for you may carry little or none for another. Thus, the bias you have placed within your own being in order to learn and to serve in such and such a fashion is that coloration which you will use as your food and nourishment for your journey of seeking, learning to discover these biases, seeking their roots, and then balancing each with its opposite so that your journey may be complete and your lessons and services fully expressed.

When two biased entities interact, a portion of any seeming harmony or disharmony will be what you might call real, and what we would call less of an illusion. Then the portion that is already distorted, which we might call an illusion within an illusion—or less real, thusly—if there is the need to deal with disharmony it softens the heart and makes more fertile the ground for harmony to move in realization that in the simplest illusion things are simply arising and dissolving and that you have got a portion of what is arising and are dealing with it as it dissolves. But you are not getting the whole picture, you are not responsible for getting a whole picture; you are not getting it entirely accurate, nor are you responsible for such.

In this way you may already take a short moment to smile at your predicament, for you don’t have all the facts, you are not hearing anyone else’s sum total of all his facts. There is no possibility of perfect communication because there is no possibility of perfect realization within the illusion. There are those who seek perfect realization, but within the illusion we have the opinion that the purpose of the illusion is to present you with difficulties and frustrations in order that you may test the wings of your love and desire to serve, and test also the structure of your belief system of ethics, how you put into action the tools and resources you have gathered about you as ideals, ethical points of view, and tenets of faith.

Now, when one is asked to accept the self or another self there is fundamentally, precisely the same difficulty, but because of the self-consciousness so important to your learning experiences within third density the work done in regard to the self and in regard to the other self will differ somewhat. When working with acceptance of the self there is the push towards a complete self-honesty. This is not so difficult for the spiritual seeker to accomplish. Then there is the desire for acceptance of and desire for the self. This is very difficult for all entities in third density to achieve. The ability to accept the self is hindered by the feeling that since the thoughts of the self are ever imperfect it seems reasonable not to accept the self totally but to continue to judge the self.

In your density you are not privy to the private thoughts of other selves. You may think that other selves have more pristine thought processes. This assumption is likely to be false, yet you are able to forgive and accept other selves a hundred times more easily that you are able to accept the self. We say to you that you do not need to accept the self all at once. Since you are home to yourself at all times you have a long relationship with your own student persona. Trust in that relationship, and be to yourself as the excellent teacher, one who encourages the student, one who accepts the student’s errors, pointing them out and then giving another quiz or test which the student now may pass with honors, having learned the facts as opposed to erroneous and mistaken facts of a given situation.

Lean into the persona of the nurturing teacher to the self, the nurturing parent, the nurturing authority, and in the end, the nurturing Creator, and realize that you have no need to consign yourself to some perdition because of errors. The moment for an error comes and dissipates, and the process of healing may begin as soon as you allow yourself the charity that must needs accompany the beginning of such healing. This is important to your polarity in service to others for you have been told by the master known as Jesus to love others as you love yourself. Learning to love the self in the midst of perceived imperfection then is, we suggest, a key to going about the steady work of one who is of service-to-others polarity.

Here Q’uo said that when we experience disharmony with another self, we are only experiencing a portion of this experience that is real because there is no possibility of clear communication within the illusion.  They said that the purpose of the illusion is to create difficulties for us so we can increase our desire to love and serve others and test our belief system by exercising our ideals, ethics, and faith.  However, they said that it is hard for us to accept ourselves because we know our thoughts are imperfect, and we are more likely to accept others before we accept ourselves, so they suggested that we take on the role of the teacher that encourages our student self and gives occasional quizzes to help our self to learn. Then Q’uo said that we should continue as the nurturing teacher/Creator that allows the healing and love of the self in spite of perceived imperfections as this is key to one who is of the service-to-others polarity. On April 20, 1997, Q’uo described the value of our perceived imperfections:

It is these perceived imperfections, then, that make that nebulous and necessary connection between consciousness and manifestation. Therefore, we encourage you to glory in and enjoy your personality. We encourage each to appreciate the real value of confusion. As each finds herself becoming too intense, or too this, or too that, take the time to speak to self tenderly and to say, “I know that you are feeling foolish, but this is the folly that teaches.” Therefore, abide in peace and allow the confusion to do its work, for from these concatenations of circumstances hitting that personality shell shall come the catalyst that gives to you the seeker all that you desire: the opportunity to intensify and accelerate the processes of spiritual evolution within the spark of the Creator that is your eternal and infinite self.

Now, gaze at another self which has assaulted the senses with unexpected hostility or simply has presented some situation which is awkward or in which there is a high degree of possibility for miscommunication. If the life is a story, then it is well to tell the story to each other when there is the possibility for missed signals and confusing conversation. If there is an accepting ear and a willing communicator on the other side of the equation of the self and other self we suggest taking the time, and time is most valuable, to communicate in vulnerability and honesty with the other self, allowing yourself to be shiningly clear. This means not defending the position that you find yourself in but simply stating it and asking for clarification from the other self. When there is such a one there is formed at that moment a true bond. Two entities have entered into a heart-felt transaction, and that which was difficult has become clear, for there is open communication, there is an open heart, and where there are two open hearts there is always exchange of energy and the healing of breaches which were experienced.

If the entity which is the other self is not at this moment ready to communicate openly and clearly but rather continues to be accusatory or frustrating or simply puzzled in some deleterious way then the matter is imperfect yet concluded, and the rest of the work is done within the self, forgiving the self for being unable to create apparent harmony, forgiving the other self for the same, and accepting in the self the desire to control the harmony of the situation even though this control is positively intended and ends up seeming to be a negative value since control exercised without resolve is more apparent in its manipulatory aspects.

Gaze at that seeming manipulation and realize that with self-consciousness comes the manipulation of objects and of thoughts to understand, to accomplish. The manipulations are not all of the same kind nor are they to be judged the same way. Negative manipulations are carefully to be recognized, but the attempts towards harmony, if not carried beyond the first attempt, are certainly not negative, except that each entity has the responsibility to manipulate the world of illusion, to mold it in love and in light. Mistakes may seem to be made—simply keep the intention high and the efforts to understand the other self intensive and persistent.

As for the recalcitrant-seeming other self, we suggest the use of prayer; realize that one which runs from love and compassion is a sorrowing and hard-pressed entity. The root causes of this sorrow or misery are not necessarily known even to the other self, yet you may pray that light may bless this self, that love may touch the heart of this self that you have no way of understanding unless that self speaks clearly to you, yet always is there the strength of praise and thanksgiving for the opportunity to hold another in the heart and offer that held other self up to the love and the light that streams infinitely from the infinite One.

Energies in a confrontation feel like jagged lines. What one wishes to do as a positive entity is to attempt through clear communication and the right use of compassion and compassionate manipulation to cause a mutual feeling of dancing in one spiraling circle, upwards in the light. When this is not possible you simply continue this dance by yourself, swirling and dipping in the rhythms of the eternal with a keen and loving ear to the music of love and light. This way of speaking of prayer is hardly literal, but this is the sort of feeling we encourage in the prayers. One does not always know for what to pray for another’s needs, yet one may, when in the flow of the eternal, pray those abiding prayers of love, praise, and thanks for each and every experience which has been experienced with this entity, thereby offering this entity to the Creator in order that the Creator’s Love and Light may be felt more and more in that other self’s life to the end known best by the other self and its Creator.

Now Q’uo said that if we find ourselves in a disharmonious situation that we should take the time necessary to communicate as authentically as possible with the one that we feel disharmony with, and then we should allow them to do the same so that there are two open hearts that can heal the disharmony. However, Q’uo said that if the other self is unwilling to communicate, then we must work on our self to forgive our self and the other self for being unable to heal the disharmony and accept our self for wishing to control this situation in the attempt to find harmony. Q’uo went on to say that attempting to control situations in order to achieve harmony are positive if only one attempt is made, and if we cannot resolve the disharmony with the other self that we should pray for them and hold them up to the Love and Light of the infinite One so this Love and Light may be felt more and more in that other self’s life to the end known best by the other self and its Creator. On September 4, 2016, Q’uo spoke about the resolving of disharmony:

Thus, when you engage yourself in a conscious fashion to provide honest communication with another human being, you are indeed engaged in the stuff of the third-density illusion, shall we say, in making clear of that which is unclear, and making whole of that which is broken, the healing of that which is wounded.

These are noble efforts, my friends. These are not easy activities to undertake. But if you are a conscious seeker of truth, it will be your nature and desire to do this in your daily round of activities above all else, no matter what it may seem to be upon your list of activities for the day. To find harmony where there was disharmony, to find peace where the was unrest, to find wholeness where there was brokenness, this is more important than buying your groceries, than running your errands, than delivering a friend to a place or destination. That you deliver yourself and another to the heart of your own truth in an honest fashion is one of the greatest gifts that you can give to another, and indeed to yourself, and ultimately to the one Creator who resides within you and discovers more of Itself through your work to discover yourself.

At this time we would transfer this contact to the one known as Jim that it may conclude this session of working. We thank this instrument and this group again, and would at this time leave this instrument in love and in light. We would transfer now. We are those of Q’uo.

This morning I continued my transplanting of double impatiens in one corner garden around the Flower Fall Mound in the front yard, then garden impatiens in the two small gardens on the other side of the Flower Fall Mound. Then I went over to the Wuthering Heights Mound and transplanted four coral bells into the bottom of the mound and some leftover impatiens and double impatiens to the third section of the Wuthering Heights Mound. Then I went into the back yard and transplanted three azaleas into the cross area. My last job of the morning was to continue the trimming of the areas where I will mow grass this afternoon, primarily in the back yard.

This afternoon I finished the trimming of the yard that I began this morning, and then I mowed the grass in the back yard and around the Wuthering Heights Mound in the front yard. Then I used my backpack blower to blow all walkways clean.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 20

The Heritage Of Christ

I am of the principle of the full consciousness of love.

Once, many years ago, a man you call Jesus walked upon the dry soil of his native land. The reality of an incarnation is such that at times it may blind those who follow such an incarnation of Christhood to the eternal and immutable consciousness of Christ which was carried within that incarnation but which is available always for those who seek this consciousness.

It is not an illusion or a delusion to seek the consciousness of Christ. Focusing upon the incarnation of Jesus the Christ is a tool and a resource, a blessing, and a gift. However, the very air that you breathe carries the consciousness of Christhood.

Know that you are channels of the consciousness of Christ and, insofar as you may give yourself over entirely to that consciousness, others shall see Christ through you.

For are you not also the sons and daughters of humankind? Do you not also share the heritage which Jesus offered for all? We encourage you to refrain from despair in focusing upon the incarnation of Jesus and contrasting it with your own consciousness.

Peace be with you as you create new life by your consciousness, now and ever. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from July 12, 1992:

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and in light through this instrument. It is our privilege at this time to offer ourselves in the capacity of attempting to speak to any further queries. Is there a query at this time with which we may begin?

Questioner: When one is cycling in the negativity understanding that there may be a judgment of self occurring, a lot of times that manifests in the physical. One can feel it through tension headaches or through difficulty with stomach or intestines. It will affect you in the body in some manner. There’s concern as to whether that negativity that is festering… obviously it’s turning into internal damage in the physical body.

How do you define the difference between healthy negativism and negativism that actually goes deeper, and, in effect, ends up being destructive to that self who, in essence, is only trying to heal the self? It seems to be a paradox. Are there ways in which you can either attempt, through that period of negativity when you don’t seem to be able to get to your higher self and understand the higher concepts… is there some other way or other methods that you can work towards healing the physical aspect of what you’re feeling and what you’re doing to yourself in terms of being able to block that from happening so that you don’t further self-destruct with the negative patterns while you are attempting to heal yourself of being negative?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. The overriding concept, in our opinion, as regards this query is the feeling that is at the heart of the entity as it is attempting to move itself into a new pattern of being, perceiving, and doing. There is that fear of not living up to the ideals that is a kind of angst, which we have suggested may be utilized by the seeker in a manner which will have the overall effect of enhancing the transformation. This is that small, quivering fear that remains at the corner of the mind reminding one that there is the need to give the best effort at each moment. This kind of fear we find to be not deleterious in the usual sense, but that which spurs the entity on to its best effort.

The kind of negativity that takes center place upon the inner stage of being and thinking, and tends to cause a gathering about it of further fear, is the fear which begins to rot, shall we say, various connective points within the mind/body/spirit complex, and eventually causes physical degeneration of those organs connected to the emotional bodies, as you have been studying them. This kind of fear is that which is indulged in by those who have either little reign upon their inner doubt or who have a tendency from time to time to indulge in self-destructive, as you would call them, behaviors and thoughts, tempting the good intentions of the entity itself, so that the entity becomes divided within itself as to how it shall expend its energies, attempting for a good portion of time to affect those positive changes in which it has invested its ideals and its concept of self, and, at the same time, seeking to undermine those ideals and the effort to match the life pattern with them.

This darker side of fear is that kind of fear which has given a certain sort of pleasure to the entity in its previous experiences, a kind of punishment of the self which the entity has seen as necessary according to those experiences with the parental and other authority figures within the early life experience, so that the entity does, then, when there is the challenge that presents itself in the form of transformation and change, is to behave in a split fashion, so that one portion of the self exhorts the self to move to those high ideals, and the other portion of the self, for a variety of potential reasons, assumes the punishing parental figure and punishes the self with the kind of fear that not only undermines the desire and effect of the change, but also can cause the physical disease as well.

For this kind of fear, and any other behavior or thought that moves one into the areas of disharmony and imbalance, we recommend the daily meditation and use of the balancing exercises which each in this group has utilized for some portion of time in the past. This looking at the inventory of mental and emotional experiences for each day can find the roots of such fear and remove them by balancing them with their polar opposite in the manner which those of Ra gave as the balancing exercises. We recommend the daily review in the meditative state of all thoughts and behaviors that have passed through one’s being, as the water moves through the river channel, so that disharmonies may be detected as early as possible and balanced in a manner which makes more whole the entire range of experience of the seeker.

Questioner asked about the difference between healthy negativity and unhealthy negativity that resulted in judgement of the self, and how she could deal with negativity so that it did not get into the body and manifest in a destructive way there? Q’uo began by saying that the basic principle here was the decision to go through transformation and use fear in a way which helped one live up to one’s ideals. They continued by saying that sometimes one exercises fear in a manner that causes one to behave in a way that undermines one’s good intentions and causes injury to the inner organs that are related to the emotional body. Q’uo said that this kind of fear-based behavior was a reflection of how the parents related to the child, and it was now being experienced as the deciding of how one would seek to engage in personal transformation which could also cause physical disease. Then Q’uo recommended that meditation be used in conjunction with the balancing exercises that Ra suggested to remove the roots of fear by balancing them with their polar opposites. In 5.2, Ra gave the basic practice of the balancing exercises:

To begin to master the concept of mental discipline it is necessary to examine the self. The polarity of your dimension must be internalized. Where you find patience within your mind you must consciously find the corresponding impatience and vice versa. Each thought that a being has, has in its turn an antithesis. The disciplines of the mind involve, first of all, identifying both those things of which you approve and those things of which you disapprove within yourself, and then balancing each and every positive and negative charge with its equal. The mind contains all things. Therefore, you must discover this completeness within yourself.

The second mental discipline is acceptance of the completeness within your consciousness. It is not for a being of polarity in the physical consciousness to pick and choose among attributes, thus building the roles that cause blockages and confusions in the already-distorted mind complex. Each acceptance smoothes part of the many distortions that the faculty you call judgment engenders.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: I think I understand what you’re saying, and the split I well understand. The only other question I have, I guess, are fears that I seem to have and confusion in reference to being able to identify them. I will certainly attempt to do so during my meditations. The only other concern I have is, are some of these fears so deep-rooted that I may not be able to consciously find them in my day-to-day experience? Are they things that will come up in the future as I do these practices? Or are there certain fears that are innate and part of the incarnational experience that will eventually cause this continued split? Is there a way to mend the split in this particular incarnation, or is this going to be part of the learning lesson that I must experience? And are some of the negatives that I seem to be experiencing—are they “old” negatives that I seem to be harboring or are they just a continued perpetuation of a lot of little things that seem to add up and turn into a pattern, that seem to coagulate into this big, huge pattern that then seems to self-perpetuate itself?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. Within each entity there are fears, not because there is the necessity for fear to be a fundamental portion of this illusion or any incarnation, but because that which is mysterious, hidden within the depths of the self, unknown and which has obvious effects upon the conscious seeker, is that which poses the potential threat.

The seeker which moves upon the journey of illumination and which moves into the depths of the self is well advised to look at the overall perspective of each incarnation, and the creation as a whole, as that which is made of love. Any deviation from that love is, in some form, a distortion of love which may be discovered by the persistent application of daily meditation and the review of the experiences of each day’s round of activities. There is no fear buried so deeply that the love-inspired seeker of truth cannot uncover and balance this fear with love.

We do not mean to seem to be naive in this regard, for our recommendation in many instances where seekers feel confusion and fear is to focus upon the fundamental quality of love. We continue to recommend this focusing upon love as the foundation stone of all creation and all incarnation, not only because this is so as we have experienced it, but because it is well for each seeker to look for that love within the life pattern in order that the desire to see and to seek this love may perform its part in attracting this love to the seeker. For it is a metaphysical principle that you shall find that which you seek. We recommend, therefore, that as you plumb those depths of mystery within that you remind yourself that you move within a creation of love, a creation which is in harmony with itself and with you.

These fears that motivate from the depths of one’s being have power only because they are distortions of the power of love. When you are able to untangle the distortion of love, then you shall see how this distortion was first caused. The cause is almost always within the early portion of this life experience in accordance with choices that were made before this life experience regarding that which one wished to learn.

Questioner asked whether she would be able to find the deeper fears within her, and how could she heal that split behavior of aiming for transformation and then sabotaging her efforts? Q’uo replied by saying that she should use meditation to discover the mystery of how any of her behaviors have moved away from the concept of love and then balance these behaviors with love. Q’uo completed their response by saying that these deep fears are distortions of love which have come from the early years of the incarnation and are products of pre-incarnative choice as lessons that are to be learned. On June 7, 1980, Latwii spoke of how distortions of love can aid in learning lessons:

You must realize that in the creation of the Father, there are many distortions of love. When you view a distortion of love, you may not intellectually realize in that moment that this distortion will eventually begin its positive evolution towards love in its true state. But, if you train yourself from time to time, the muscle memory, shall we say, will give you strength.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Questioner: Not at this time. Thanks.

I am Q’uo, and we thank you, my sister. Is there another query at this time?

Carla: I have an observation and a query. Being the channel, I couldn’t really catch everything, but it seems to me that in describing the way you go about getting through transformation it’s a lot like the way you go about channeling, in that all of the work that a channel does is done before the channeling ever begins, and it has to do with cleansing the self of human opinion and world opinion and just the junk of everyday thinking, and trying to tune oneself to the highest and best in one, but then also to ask for the highest and best that one can carry in a stable manner. And when you were talking about change it seemed to me you were saying that the work that you do is done before the change really begins—it’s when you desire to change something about yourself, and that desire is purified to the point where it actually starts a change occurring. And, at that point, your work is over, and what you need to do is, in the midst of your desire, to say that you want to approximate your ideals—the highest and best that you’re capable of—and the change that you’re capable of in a stable manner. Is this a just observation and is this a valid point?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister, and we can agree wholeheartedly that you have made a point that is quite valid. For each seeker of truth is a channel for the life experience, and when one finds oneself in the midst of change or transformation, this experience is the result of much desire previous to the beginning of the change, for first must come the recognition of oneself as one is at a particular moment. Then there comes, or perhaps does not come, the desire for change in a certain area of the life experience. Only after these recognitions have been achieved is the seeker able to undertake any portion of the change, which then may be manifested to the eye, the ear, or the emotions of the seeker undergoing the change.

By the time the changing and the frustration that comes with change is noticed, most of the work of the seeker has been accomplished as regards setting the change in motion. The work that remains for such a seeker, noticing the change within its being and experience, is the work of moving in harmony with the change. For this reason, we recommended the lighthearted approach which tends to see that all is well, that discomforts can be humorous and certainly can be survived, and can be survived most efficiently when there is this lighthearted approach.

Is there a further query, my sister?

Carla: No, Q’uo. Thank you very much.

I am Q’uo, and again we thank you, my sister. And, as we appear to have exhausted the queries for this session of working, we shall take this opportunity to thank each seeker present for inviting our presence into your meditation and circle of working this day. We are very happy to be invited and privileged to partake in your seeking. We offer our words and opinions freely, with the only admonition being that you take those which ring of truth to you and leave behind those that do not. Again, our great gratitude for your desire to seek and for your invitation to us that we might seek with you.

D: Wait! Before you go, can I ask another question?

I am Q’uo, and we are happy to entertain another query from the one known as D.

D: Okay, great. We were discussing earlier about tones and things that we receive here, and I guess as we become more aware, at least in my own experience, I’ve become more aware of certain things that would not seem to be the norm to most people. The discordant tones that I heard in one particular instance—which were all very loud and buzzing in my ears—I wanted to know why that occurred? What was happening when that did occur? What happens on other occasions when just one single tone occurs? Does this have something to do with discord always, or are there various reasons for these particular things?

And the other thing that I’ve been lately experiencing which was the freeze-frames of patterns which I see, which have only happened in the last couple of months. Is that just another awareness happening? They’re interesting when they happen. They seem to crop up more and more as I become more aware, and I was wondering if you could define these? And, if there are reasons for the discordant tones, is there any way that I could work with them when they do occur so that I can either rebalance myself when it occurs, or is there another reason that it occurs?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. To begin, we must speak carefully in these queries, for we do not wish to infringe upon your own free will discovery of the symbols which your subconscious mind provides to your conscious mind as a means of focusing the attention. Those tones which sound disharmony are often utilized to signify just this. Look at that experience which was most important and which preceded such tones in your previous experience and correlate those experiences with these tones. As the number of tones of disharmony increase, look at this symbol of increased disharmony.

The query concerning the freeze-frames is one which we must be most careful with, for this means of communication from the subconscious mind is one which is more specific in its indication of the need for attention. Look at the frames. Meditate upon the images. Make the correlations which appear within your inner view as you meditate upon the images.

Was there a further query, my sister?

D: Just in reference to the freeze-frames. Right now, at this time, they appear to be so fast I can’t grasp them, perhaps because it is just meant to be an attention-getter, seeing as my attention is not always there in meditation. Should I focus on attempting to draw them out so I can recognize those as patterns, or is it just occurring because my attention span is not where it should be when I am meditating? It’s not just when I’m meditating though, it happens all the time now. So, when I close my eyes, and whether I eat or go into prayer or just attempt to close my eyes for a few minutes, they occur. And they occur quite frequently, so I take it as some kind of signal that I should be doing something, but I can’t seem to grasp it. And I can’t seem to grasp the patterns because they are so instantaneous. They’re almost quicker than a second. I’m just not sure as to how I can do as you said and take those frames and meditate upon them, when I can’t even seem to catch them.

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. To meditate upon that which moves quickly before the inner eye is perhaps to move into a different kind of meditation. That is to say, that as the images move quickly, rather than attempting to stop the movement and capture an image, it would be helpful to feel the feeling tone that such rapid moving images leave as their residue. Perhaps an image will remain with a feeling tone. Perhaps just a feeling. Perhaps just an image. Perhaps a series of images. Whatever is the residue, the charge, the power of the experience, then, take that residue and meditate upon it and make whatever correlations present themselves.

In this way, we feel that you may begin to follow a trail, shall we say, which is being left for you by your subconscious mind which has been alerted by the conscious mind, through your intensity and desire of seeking, that information is desired in regards to a certain kind of level of seeking. This trail is that which is of importance. Follow the trail to the best of your abilities, realizing that the methods used are those to which you are the most susceptible or most able to glean information from.

Is there a further query, my sister?

D: The only other query I had was in reference to the dreams. You had mentioned earlier that we were a series of complex illusions of dreams within dreams. In reference to the framework of information between my self and my higher self, how can I go about deciphering what seems nonsensical dreams? I find patterns that I begin to recognize. Carla has been a great help in reference to helping me to decipher some of these. But is there a better way, is there some kind of thing, seeing as I have a tendency to work in the dream field… It’s very natural to concentrate on something before I go to sleep so that I may be able to attain the highest clarity of connection between myself and my higher self, so that I can begin to also work in conjunction with meditation and prayer. When I do this, is there a method of visualization or something that I can do just prior to sleeping—while just on the verge of going to sleep—so that I can mentally attune myself to receiving the highest or the best work, for either that particular day or for the particular situation that I’m in where I need help?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of you query, my sister. We feel that you have well prepared yourself for the work with dreams, and can only suggest that you provide yourself with the tools for recording your dreams as soon as you have experienced the dreams as is possible. The repeating and reminding to the self that you wish to remember the dreams is most important. And the preparation for the dreaming by mental contemplation upon the topic of most concern is also recommended so that the brain will have access to as much information as is possible to feed into the dreaming process. This is helpful as a preparation at all times.

Is there another query, my sister?

Yes. I’ve experienced, in the past, hearing telepathic messages through my dreams from what seems to be various different entities when I’ve asked certain questions. One of the reasons I’ve refrained from doing this for the last year was the caution involved. But there were times when I telepathically received things. Was that coming from my higher self? Was that coming from guides? And should I continue to attempt to work with those who have obviously worked with me in the past through dreams, or should I really within the next year continue as I have been doing, working directly with the higher self and from the higher self into God?

I am Q’uo, and am aware of your query, my sister. We must apologize for being unwilling to give advice in this regard, for it is in the area that is of most importance in the exercise of your own choice-making ability to determine those practices which are more helpful than are others in your seeking. Thus, we leave these choices to you, reminding you that you are aware that your higher self portion does indeed communicate with you in your dream state.

Is there another query, my sister?

D: No, but thank you very much for all the information.

I am Q’uo, and we would ask if there are any final queries at this time.

[Pause]

I am Q’uo, and once again we shall thank each entity for the honor of spending time and opinion and inspiration with you. We are inspired by you as much as we hope that you are inspired by us, for you seek within the illusion of the third density, where so much of the Creator must be sought in darkness and in mystery. Brave and courageous souls are you who so seek…

[Tape ends.]

This morning I vacuumed the first floor of the house and then went outside to transplant the flowers that I bought yesterday afternoon. I was able to complete the transplanting of the dianthus in the garden beside the parking area in front of the house. Then I made an errand run to Paul’s Fruit Market to buy some food for myself, and I also stopped by Walgreen’s Drug Store to buy some Pepsi Zero and some non-food items.

This afternoon a friend and I went to visit Connie in the care home in southern Indiana. We took along some non-sugar snacks for each of us before I began reading The Things We Don’t Forget by Dianne Aprile. We had some thoughts to share with each other at various points in the reading as there is so much spiritual information in this book. We concluded our visit with our usual meditation.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 19

Be Still And Adore

I am of the consciousness of Jesus the Christ, and I greet you in that full consciousness of love.

Be still!

Be still, each soul which seeks within and without for that stranger that you would identify as mystery.

Be still, each portal of sense and every shadow of pleasure and pain.

Be still! Let all come to rest, to kneel and adore. Let the self become a zero; a heavenly nothing. For only in the zero lies the infinity which then may fill the infinite space within which has been opened to the infinity without.

It is not by striving but by still surrender that the pilgrim of Earth shall know the place where he has been all the time.

We leave you in peace, now and always. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from July 12, 1992:

The question this afternoon deals with the concept of change and transformation, and the confusion, the anger, the frustration that comes when we don’t feel that we’re changing in the way that we wish to change. Most students of their own evolution look at their lives, and, at some time, attempt to match the life with the ideals that they hold, and feel that there are certain things that they can do. But most of us look at our attempts to change and feel that we are inadequate in our change, and that we are perhaps not even moving in the right direction. And as we begin to change and have this confusion and anger, we become further befuddled when we don’t move as we wish. It seems to be a self-perpetuating cycle, and we’re wondering if there’s a way that we can make the process of change one more easily accomplished; or is there some necessity for change, in order for it to be seated in our being, to become a tumultuous sort of experience? Are we supposed to be in turmoil? Is there some benefit that we can gain from being in turmoil? Is there some way to deal with the turmoil that is erroneous? Can we communicate with our higher selves through dreams? Can we do exercises? Can we watch our diet? Can we meditate more? What can we do that will make our perception of our change more balanced and harmonious? How can we accomplish change in the most efficient manner as seekers of truth?

(Carla channeling)

We are those of Q’uo. Greetings and blessings to each in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We wish you the peace of heart and mind that seekers have, yet often know not that they have, and would offer our thoughts in reaction to your query upon the ways of dealing with confusion when the changes in life feel as though they were coming too quickly to understand or guide. As we offer our thoughts, we remind each that our opinions are fallible, and, if any thought disturbs any of you or feels misplaced, simply to omit it from your memory, as we would not offer even more confusion of an unhelpful kind.

We imply that change can be helpful. Confusion can be helpful, and do so on purpose. There is a difference between discomfort and injury. The confusion of incarnate life in general is massive, and was meant to be so in order to challenge and successfully baffle the intellectual mind, which thinks in black and white, yes and no. The point of this baffling effect is to coax the seeker into opening the heart to the processes of thinking, evaluating, and decision-making. Those with unawakened hearts may reason perfectly, yet come to inappropriate or inefficient decisions and conclusions relative to their own deeper desires. The spiritual journey is many things, but is not linear or logical.

Earlier this day, this instrument was thinking of a story within its holy work. It is an apt tale to share at this time. It concerns a traveler who was robbed, beaten, and left upon the road. He was passed by a very well-placed gentleman who had an appointment. The man left the traveler on the road, as did another wealthy man. But there was a stranger who found the man, and although he was not from this particular region, the stranger took up the robbed and beaten man, carried him to a place of safety and succor, and made sure the beaten traveler had what he needed to recover.

In the context of the Holy Bible’s story, this was an answer to a question concerning who one’s neighbor is. The answer indicated that all were neighbors, not simply those clustered geographically around one. In the context of the query concerning confusion in a time of change, the story may be seen to be an inward representation of a frequent circumstance which occurs when the seeker attempts to monitor, review, analyze, and interrupt the process of change in order to make it more like the picture the seeker has in the mind.

When a seeker becomes an actor not only of desire, but of grasping the life as it is being lived, and attempting to help the process of change along, the seeker is standing athwart what may loosely be called “desire-driven destiny.” The resulting cross tides of confusion are a mechanically created artifact of this stance. Yet, each seeker wishes to so live the life and so cleanly make each choice that it is in charge of the life experience and gives it up to the infinite One as a beautiful gift.

The group question for this session was: What can we do that will make our perception of our change more balanced and harmonious? How can we accomplish change in the most efficient manner as seekers of truth? Q’uo began by saying that change and confusion can be helpful because they are part of opening one’s heart to the process of thinking and making choices. Then Q’uo used the story of the Good Samaritan from the Bible to illustrate that we can’t intellectually evaluate who our neighbors are, since we are all one, and we can’t evaluate that which occurs when we attempt to analyze the process of change and how it may occur outside the bounds of what we see as change. Then Q’uo said that when we try to manipulate the changes occurring in our lives, we are interfering with our destiny which causes confusion, and the best course to follow would be to make the choice to give up the changing life experience to the infinite One as a beautiful gift. On March 19, 1989, Hatonn spoke of using change as a means to turn to the mysterious face of the Eternal One:

It is well that the change takes place slowly enough that one’s mate may deal with it as well as one’s self. The process of change is sometimes painful, and we urge each to be extremely courageous and pick oneself up after each and every self-perceived failure to turn one’s face again to the mysterious face of the Eternal One.

Of course, seekers wish to help along the process of transformation. But if the seeker can pull the point of view back far enough to gaze upon the conscious self living through the confusion of change, which has been put in motion because of purified desire, this seeker may see that once the desire is honed and tempered then there comes the time of faithful patience. The intellectual mind may rush ahead and seem to predict accurately outcomes which are not actual outcomes, thus creating confusion on top of the necessary initial confusion which accompanies any change.

How much better to respect the work in consciousness which has been done, and then to see the self as the first neighbor, the nearest one to the observing portion of the self. The conscious seeker moving through the frustration, pain, and anger of not yet understood changes is a weary, broken, tired and needy traveler. Yet, there is a portion of the self which may remember to forget the rush towards the next appointment, to let go of the control of happenstance, because there is a neighbor, a self—which happens to be the self, rather than an other—which needs aid and comfort in his travail.

The seeker is so eager to go through the process of transformation, yet it is a long, subtle process. The implications of any one decision seem on the surface limited, but when one is transforming the being the seemingly limited ripples of effect give way to a much more complex field of interwoven options or varieties of tone and color in the, may we call it, “sub-programs” within the mind which are in fact effected by seemingly simple changes in the way of being.

To change an action is relatively simple in its effect upon the essential core meta-program of beingness. It often does not touch any deep programming to change a behavior. But you are asking about changing a beingness, changing the way of perceiving and experiencing one’s own essence and this is endlessly subtle work.

You can, and may well, take the uncomfortable self and visualize the giving of healing and love to this self. You would do just such for another. You also may do this for the self. When the self is somewhat comforted, the gaze again may be turned to the observation and watching of the working out of the destiny requested by the purified desire already spent. Faithfully and trustingly place the deeper observational self, with eyes clear and alert, at the right hand of all that occurs; but ask for the patience and the faith to remain an observer while a process seems to be working itself out.

All your work as an entity of spirit is groundwork laid in before confusion overtakes one. Once the cloud of confusion is there, the realization simply may be maintained and remembered that this was asked for, this is occurring, and this is a time-bound phenomenon. In this way, you are able to affirm your own desires, to comfort your own discomfort, and to position the heart open and lovingly addressing the confusion in tones of faith in the process and trust in the kindly nature of the Creator, which allowed you as co-creator to create this vortex of transformation and to go through it, powered by desire.

Now Q’uo said that if one strongly desires to experience the transformation of change it is necessary to look from the larger perspective to see the confusion that comes with change and exercise patience and comfort for the self because “you are asking about changing a beingness, changing the way of perceiving and experiencing one’s own essence, and this is endlessly subtle work.” Then Q’uo said that one could give love and healing to the uncomfortable self and then faithfully become the observer of one’s destiny that has been so strongly desired as this process works itself out. Q’uo went on to say that this process of transformation was pre-incarnatively chosen, so it is well to open the heart to love and faith in the confusion of the process of change, and to trust the kindly Creator which allowed the creation of this vortex of transformation which is powered by one’s desire. On November 2, 2003, Q’uo described the process of transformation:

One cannot drag oneself, reluctantly, to embrace transformation. It certainly can happen that way, for the energies of transformation are absolutely unstoppable. Evolution will occur automatically. It is just rather slow compared to the rate of change that is possible when an entity has decided to cooperate and to lean into the process of transformation.

Again and again it is necessary to come to the center of self with open hands, empty hands, full of unknowing, full of all of the colors that have painted your world within the last little while, whether those colors be bright and cheerful chintzes or deep purples and browns and blacks coming from difficult experiences. All of these gifts may be taken into that place and laid before the infinite One, so that you have empty hands, you have an open heart, and you are on your knees, in terms of being without pride, without arrogance, without the need to be sure or to be right.

You ask, “What can be done to aid the process of change, to ameliorate the discomfort of the confusion?” Firstly, we do not recommend attempts to become comfortable. If change is comfortable, it is likely not to be effectual. One wishing change is dealing with power which is moving in one direction. This power and all its ramifications are being asked to alter their vectors. In any study of movement of things with weight, one can see clearly the mechanics of turning to be those of the braking, the balancing, the changes in the steering, and so forth. A good deal of dynamic work is done when there is momentum to overcome and a new direction to be taken and then to be accelerated in the new direction.

So, too, when doing work in consciousness, you have a certain amount of spiritual mass which has a certain amount of momentum. When change is desired, prayed and asked for, visualized and preparations made, then there is a very graceful moment available when the realization may come that the spiritual visualization preceding change has been completed, and now the spirit, along with the conscious self in incarnation, must hang on for a bumpy ride, for there will be the braking to overcome momentum, the proper shift in direction which takes several adjustments, and then the process of gradual addition of power to the direction so that the pace is accelerated once again. The one who attempts to wrest change too quickly is doing work against the self and subverting his own spiritual, purified desires.

The various helps mentioned as possibilities—such as working with dreams, changes in diet, and so forth—are valuable individually insofar as they offer to a seeker a comfort. What is most uncomfortable about confusion? It is the disorder. It is the feeling that one is out of control. Those who seek tend to see this feeling, which is natural, and say “I should not be feeling off-balanced; I should be clear.” But “should” is not an helpful word. The way one should be is the way one is. We do not mean to split hairs, but to take one word out of the language would be perhaps rewarding to those moving through change, and this word is “should.” The heart has a wisdom concerning time which the mind lacks. Thusly, it is well to let the heart choose what form of comfort it may appropriately and skillfully take to bolster the endurance while going through transformation.

Such things as the cleansing of the diet may well give one a feeling of more control. The keeping of the dream notebook is a way of glimpsing the material which the deeper mind is discovering, recovering, and restructuring, and this may give one a deeper sense of some control in understanding the process. But, intrinsic to the process are two things: the willingness to endure through discomfort, and the faith that invokes unlimited patience, for the time of change is, in spiritual terms, timeless. Yet, that instant which in time/space exists for so long, being fully potentiated to come into manifestation in space/time, occupies a variable amount of space/time in the experience of one in incarnation. Thusly, there is not a standard waiting period, and patience needs to be given without limit.

One thing we do recommend for all who experience confusion is a very well-encouraged sense of humor. The most helpful point of view for a changing spiritual seeker is light-hearted irreverence. Play with that which is occurring. Be playful. Allow the vision to relax, the eyesight to become less than entirely single-mindedly keen when the pressure mounts and the anxiety builds, when frustration and anger begin to accumulate. Lighten your own load with laughter. And if you can laugh with another, the strength of this joy is doubled. Part of the service spiritual seekers may be to each other is to exhort and encourage each other to take it easier with the situation and the self.

Many are the times when a serious seeker feels very inadequate to that which he wishes to accomplish. The earnestness begins to become more tight and urgent. The seriousness is taken further and further until this beau geste consumes one. To a point, this intensity is helpful. Beyond that point, it always needs to be remembered that the most serious things in a life experience are made more clear and understandable by the enhancement of turning the spotlight off the seriousness of the situation and onto the beauty, the praiseworthy beauty, of the overall plan.

When one may praise the plan and give thanks for going through the necessary confusion, one is then taking very seriously and single-mindedly the transformation itself, but has let up the pressure on the self to do “such and such” or not do “such and such” in conjunction with this transformation. To take the principles, the ideals, seriously is excellent; to take the self seriously is folly. Let the self be human. Laugh at this humanity. Love it and see that it is perfectly normal to fear that which is painful.

Here Q’uo said that we should not attempt to be comfortable in times of change as our life’s momentum is moving us in a different direction, and we will also subvert our spiritual desires if we attempt to change too quickly. Q’uo continued by saying that the most uncomfortable thing about change is things being out of order or out of control, but we would benefit by letting the heart, rather than the mind, determine the process and time of transformation to occur. Then Q’uo said that we could gain some sense of control of this process by changing our diet or working with dreams to access the workings of our deeper mind, but more important would be the willingness to endure discomfort and the faith that invokes unlimited patience since spiritual transformation is timeless. They also suggested that when the process of change evokes anxiety, anger, or frustration that a sense of humor is a valuable ally, especially if shared with a friend. They said we should let our self be human and laugh at the process of change and love it. In 34.6, Ra made this same suggestion:

We observed your interest in the catalyst of pain. This experience is most common among your entities. The pain may be of the physical complex. More often it is of the mental and emotional complex. In some few cases the pain is spiritual in complex-nature. This creates a potential for learning. The lessons to be learned vary. Almost always these lessons include patience, tolerance, and the ability for the light touch.

In this group there is not the holding of the fear to the self, for which we would need to request correction; there is only the judgment of the self by the self as the self sees that it has fear. May we say that, in our opinion, fear is a normal and healthy reaction to pain. When you were small you recoiled from the touch to the oven. This was wise. Now you put yourself to more subtle testing of the boundaries and nature of your journey. You will frequently touch something very “hot” and have the healthy fear which allows you to recoil and remove the self from spiritual or mental pain. Allow yourself to move naturally and vulnerably through the unknown. Accept and love the fear, the frustration, the anger. Note them. Honor them. Comfort the self experiencing them, but do not deny them their appropriateness.

Why should you not feel the difficult process happening? Why should the changes not cause many bumps, stops, and starts, and discomforts, which express themselves in manifestations of fear, anger, and frustration? When the unknown has been penetrated by desire, the new country cannot even be seen. A transforming individual is mapping for the first of many times the new and changing territory of its road. The way is mazed and muddled, and, in many ways, the sensing self is blinded by so much incoming data concerning a novel situation. The computer mind of the physical body gives many, many alarms when receiving this kind of data from the meta-program. The resulting fear, anger or frustration is completely understandable and acceptable, at least to us.

We hope we have enabled you to have compassion upon yourselves. You have asked a question which can only be asked by those who are consciously working within themselves and who have accomplished to have purified the desire and begun to co-create a life in faith. We speak to experienced wayfarers and we say to you: When did you expect to be perfect, comfortable or settled if you wish to be a pilgrim on this particular road to infinity? You know well you expected none of those things. Comfort yourself, therefore, through the frustration. Love yourself through the anger. And cherish yourself through the depression and the grieving at the loss of the old, familiar ways. Above all, release the spirit pilgrim from the strictures of perceived time and know with every fiber of the being that the Creator’s time will become your time at the absolute moment of manifestation of transformation. Watch, wait, pray, praise, and give thanks. Always give thanks. And this thanks and praise will inform to a great degree the attitude that must lighten up the load of negative emotion.

We cheer you on in your desires and we are sympathetic with the painfulness of transformation, but we realize you wish to know not only comfortable words, but uncomfortable ones, if we feel them to be true. We do feel that it is just to experience negative emotions in an illusion which seems chaotic. We exhort you to lean on praise and thanksgiving, and then, filled with this buoyancy of spirit, gaze again and again with compassion on the weary, weary traveler that is your outer conscious self.

Now Q’uo said that fear is natural, and we should accept and love the fear and comfort ourselves as we move through this unknown territory of transformation that contains so much new data for a totally new experience. Then Q’uo said that we are co-creating a life in faith on a spiritual journey that is infinite, and we should comfort, love, and cherish ourselves through all the anger, depression, and loss of our old ways of being. They went on to say that we should have faith that the time of the manifestation of our transformation will come when the Creator’s time becomes our time, and that we should always give praise and thanksgiving for this process of change and look with compassion on our conscious self. On November 3, 1996, Q’uo spoke of the nature of the process of change:

Each of you has this sterling opportunity to break through the defenses, the shells, the masks that each has gathered about itself to defend itself from those pains which it fears. And the answer to these pains and difficulties is simply to accept them, to embrace them, to walk through them by faith, working in each case to see the love that is in the moment and to be a part of that which is good for all those whom you meet. You see, the confusions, the difficulties, the suffering are symptoms, shall we say, of the process of change or transformation when you have incomplete information. Each of you has woefully incomplete information in the conscious mind.

We apologize for taking this much time with this query, but we felt that there was no quicker way to express what are a fairly complex and subtle series of points which attempt to ground you in a new way of perceiving the spirit self in transformation. We would, at this time, thank this instrument and transfer from it that the one known as Jim may conclude the session. We leave this instrument in love and in light. We are those of Q’uo.

This morning I had an appointment with a dental surgeon to discuss how to deal with two sores that are in the gums above the teeth. He said that these sores were located above my canine teeth and had probably become injured at some point and that surgery was not necessary. eWhen I left the dental surgeon’s office I drove over to Thieneman’s Nursery to buy two more flats of snapdragons, zinnias, and dianthus. I also bought four pots of coral bells and a couple flats of double impatiens. Then I went by Paul’s Fruit Market and bought some food for myself. My last stop was a Walgreen’s to buy some Tylenol and some Glucosamine Chondroitin. When I got home I began my transplanting of flowers and completed the

This afternoon I went back outside and completed the transplanting of the all the flowers that I bought this morning, so I returned to Thieneman’s Nursery to buy two more flats of double impatiens, two more flats of Zinnias, four more pots of coral bells, and one more flat of dianthus that I hope to plant tomorrow morning.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 18

The Inward House Of Prayer

I am of the principle of the love of Jesus the Christ, and I greet you in the full consciousness of that living love.

If you seek to do the Father’s will this day, be not satisfied with actions which leave a residue within the mind and spirit of anxiety, restlessness, and fatigue. For if these things are felt, then mundane concerns have not been sacrificed in order that the Spirit may be dead to Earth and made alive to the moving will of the Creator.

If goodly and Godly effort has fatigued you, turn to the inward house of prayer and offer up the self with all of the opinions and requirements of the world in which you live.

And await the refreshment that the Spirit gives to those who pray. For it is the soul refreshed in Spirit which faces all earthly tasks without a sense of labor and all mundane toils without the expectation of fatigue.

Be only satisfied in prayer when the state of mind that is within you is that the world is alive and filled with joy, as the Spirit moves and recreates all that there is to become more and more the image and manifestation of Love.

We leave you in the inward peace which is the hallmark of the consciousness of Love amidst any circumstance. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light, and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from July 5, 1992:

The question today has to do with the concept of nurturing self-love. How do people who are naturally oriented towards being of service to others, and perhaps even serving beyond the ability to fully care for the self, take the time and energy and effort to nurture themselves? What is a way in which people can look at the nurturing of the self as a natural part of service to others? What kind of suggestions can you make as to how we can become aware of our needs for nurturing, and fulfill those needs as we go about the process of serving others and learning and growing in our daily activities?

(Carla channeling)

I am Q’uo. Greetings in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We find great joy in joining in your circle, blending our vibrations with your own, and experiencing the unity of your seeking and the beauty of your meditation. You ask this day if we have some thoughts upon how to nurture the self, as well as nurturing other entities. The service-to-others path through the fourth density of love asks the question in this manner, and by this way of asking, points directly to the core of confusion. For the question, when wisdom is applied, becomes “How do we nurture other selves, if we are those who nurture the self?” Yet, we do not encourage you to feel foolish by putting others before self in thought or action.

We wish to note for your benefit the stance which you rightly and justly, as developing spirits, take. The lesson of compassion is learned first, then the larger lesson of wisdom. You are those seeking in the school of love, therefore this query is central. The beginning of grasping the way of nurturing the self is, however, implicit in the question. We have said to this group before that the one known as Jesus taught that there was a new covenant, a new set of commandments, which superseded the commandments given to the one called Moses. The commandments were two: to love the Creator with all one’s heart, all one’s soul, all one’s mind, and all one’s strength; and to love the other selves within your environments as you love yourself. The second of the commandments was not to love yourself as you love others, but to love others as you love yourself! Thusly, this master of compassion suggested the turning of mercy inward upon the self, prior to asking the self to expand the manifestations of mercy outward.

The way of those within the illusion wherein one cannot usually hear the thoughts of others is to take others at their word in trust, and to take the self not at one’s own word, but with each and every thought which is unexpressed held like a load upon the back. Thusly, it seems appropriate to serve others, but there is a chip upon your shoulders in your attitude toward yourself.

One set of suggestions concerning the nurturing of the self is nurturing systematically each chakra by vivid visualization, and not only by meditation, but by contemplation also. Let us demonstrate using this instrument to avoid infringement upon free will of others. Each needs must make assessments of chakra strength and clarity for each. The first chakra is always the root or red-ray energy center. Gaze at this center which loves life, which breathes the air and has appetite for preservation and procreation. This root energy is anything but base. It, as this instrument is fond of saying, contains the first sacrament, as all energies are potentially sacramental. This energy gazes—we correct this instrument—this instrument gazes at this energy and finds it very strong and clear.

There being no visualization to do, this instrument proceeds to the orange-ray energy center or chakra. Here there can be seen those muddied energies which, though small, yet block some energy from moving into the open heart. How can one gaze at the shadows that dog one’s path? If one turns about to look at them, they shift. They cannot be directly confronted, for they are shadows, yet the more firmly excellence is striven for, the darker will seem every small imperfection. This instrument then must contemplate indirectly the cause for shadows. This is the area of relationships person-to-person. Whom is this instrument not in good relationship with? The answer comes by reflex. The instrument is not in good relationship with the self. There ensues a forgiving process. Why should this instrument forgive? Intellectually, the instrument can say, “I am forgiven because I am a child of the Creator.” To the heart, no reasoning is necessary. One evaluates the self. First, may we suggest that the self be visualized as being held in the arms of the infinite One, lovingly, firmly and comfortably, rocked in eternal rhythms and loved with infinite love. When one can see oneself as the child of eternity, one can see oneself at the correct distance.

How important the instrument finds the environment of the present illusion, and how typical this is, indeed, how necessary to the growth of each spirit. Yet, in the nurturing process the reestablishment of the point of view of infinity, eternity and mystery is central, and can bring order and simplicity out of chaos.

We linger at this energy center because in your particular nation state, the outer forces which compromise free will are comparatively lesser, so that the most common blockages and over-activations of energy which confound the open heart are those of orange ray.

Now, this instrument is willing to forgive the self, and we know that each is willing to do so for the self. However, this willingness is time limited because within the experience which has become memory of your peoples, it is almost without exception that this state of self-forgiveness is lost. The attention shifts, the polarity is lessened and forgotten for the moment.

The group question for this session was: What is a way in which people can look at the nurturing of the self as a natural part of service to others? Q’uo began by saying that Jesus had made a new covenant from that of Moses’s Ten Commandments which was that we should love the Creator with all our heart, all our soul, all our mind, and all our strength; and to love others as we love our self. Then Q’uo said that one way we could do this was to visualize the nature of each of our chakras in meditation and contemplation. So, the first chakra of survival and sexual reproduction is one that the instrument had no problem with since is basically fixed in nature. [ Ra, 34.15] Then Q’uo moved to the orange ray of one-to-one relationships that tend to be somewhat muddied energies that inhibit movement of energy into the heart until one is able to see the areas of the self that need forgiveness, and this forgiveness can be achieved by seeing the self as a child of the Creator, a being of eternity. Then Q’uo said that most people have problems with the orange chakra of blockage or over stimulation which causes the state of self-forgiveness to be lost. On January 7, 1990, Q’uo spoke of the value of self-forgiveness:

Firstly, we would remind all that they are in the third density. The amount of will which it takes to balance pain and the counting of blessings is enormous, and if it is not balanced, but merely suppressed, it does much more harm than good. It is well to ventilate any negative emotion while it is small, that it does not escalate into a crisis in the spiritual walk of a pilgrim. Breathe in; breathe out. This is the first blessing. You are alive. You are in this illusion, and you are learning. You earned this position, this incarnation. Carefully did you select that which shall come to you. Carefully did you estimate your limits and move catalyst to the very limits, for you wish once and for all to learn the lesson of unconditional self-forgiveness that opens the door to compassionate love. Therefore, the first thing that we should suggest is dwelling whenever possible upon the all-compassionate love and the immediate presence of the one infinite Creator.

The instrument moves to the yellow-ray energy center, and gazes at the energies which deal with the societal groups which affect it. This energy in this case seems fairly under-energized, but quite clear. This is normal in general for entities to have certain energies which are not the forte, not the strong point of an entity’s service. Yet, they do need to be visualized to be sure that, though relatively small in influence upon the learning process, the energies are clear.

Moving into the heart chakra, the green-ray energy center, the instrument visualizes a nearly fully open, very strong heart energy which is normal for this instrument. The entity finds it sparkling at this time, and realizes the effect of those in a group which love one another, causing the heart energy to dance and shine. This is the portion of the nurturing of the self wherein others move in help from whatever other energy center is being used, the blue ray of communication, the orange ray of interaction in addition to communication, and so forth. All then comes through the heart chakra to others and from others.

It is to be suggested by us that when one sees the heart fully open, one then may do well to suggest to the self the beauty of giving and receiving of love. The reception of love, it has been noted this day, is often very difficult. When the orange-ray center is blocked by self-judgment, then the shining love of others is blocked from entering the heart. Loving gestures, thoughts, and words may batter against the heart closed to itself in vain. Until the entity is willing to open the door to comfort by ceasing to judge the self as unworthy of comfort, no comfort can move into effective service.

Thusly, service to others directly denotes the allowing of others to love the self. This is often the most difficult relationship lesson of all, for if one is not in love with the self, how can one believe or have trust and faith in the illuminating light and love pouring into one’s heart from another? There is no basis for trust, for the self is not willing to trust the self. It is an irony of the third and fourth-density illusions that more and more energy is consumed in the desire to love, to open the self to more and more complete service to others, while there remains the grudge against the self. It is as though each were running away from the self, throwing the self into as many seemingly good actions as possible, in an attempt to even the terribly lopsided score of unworthiness of the self.

However, worthiness is not a quantitative matter, and is not available to the point grading system. There is no amount of service one can be to others to offset one’s own self-judged lack of worth. Until one forgives and accepts the self, one’s service will be stunted; one’s heart will be darkened, even in the fullness of the most loving service. Perhaps this points to the centrality of the learning of self-nurturing ways.

Moving into the blue-ray energy center, this instrument sees its strongest center working well, and not in need of further balancing or energizing. This is the center of communication. It is most often blocked by those who would communicate that which has not been requested. It is well to have opinions and thoughts on every conceivable matter; this is the fruit of an active mind. It is not loving, however, to answer questions or address seen problems which have not been asked about or advice sought upon by the one to whom the entity is attempting to communicate. Service to others is very much a matter of waiting and having the patience of being the quietness of mind to feel and respect other entities’ freedom to make choices.

If there is a great desire to communicate without there being a request, it is possible to enter into conversation about whether the entity you wish to serve would be glad to hear an opinion. If the other self agrees, then an appropriate channel has been opened. If the other self does not agree, then woe betide the spirit which plunges ahead regardless, for this is specific infringement upon free will. Remember that other selves and the self come into the valley of the shadow of death that is third-density life, not to be comfortable or correct, but to make mistakes and thereby learn the lessons of how not to express love and how to express love; how not to accept love and how to accept love; and most of all, how not to conceive oneself that is as unloving, unlovely or unloved, or how to picture that same self loving, lived and love itself.

The violet ray is fixed, and can simply be assessed as a good indicator of the balance which is present in the energy of your own self as a whole. If it seems weak, then meditation upon power, that is, the aspect of the self which expresses power, is recommended. Although, as in the material this instrument has recently read, it is recommended that meditations about the power aspect of the self not be accomplished more than once in a row, rather, if the power aspect needs work, then one works upon the love aspect and the wisdom aspect in two subsequent meditations before returning to the power aspect. This is recommended, as in the work of the one known as Butler, to avoid the distortion of the personality which is the spirit’s own attempting to find itself on what this instrument would call the King’s Highway.

Now, this is one way in which the nurturing of the self can be done. This way is important in that it is completely inner in the nature of its work. Just doing this work, that is, taking the time and the energy to do this series of visualizations, is a way that moves deeply into the self’s perception web of saying that the self is indeed considered worthy of attention. Often the service-to-others path is strewn with those who have paid attention to every opportunity to aid others’ needs, but have not given the self the same gift—the gift of time, the gift of energy. Outer ways of nurturing the self—the new dress, the new car or computer game or trip—is a very kind and good gift to the self. But nothing moves more deeply into the area of the self which deals with self-judgment than the self sitting down and taking time to pay attention to the self’s spiritual health. This is subtle work.

Now Q’uo moved to the yellow-ray chakra of interaction within societal groups and noted that even though it is not the strong point of one’s service it still needs to be clear. Then Q’uo spoke of the heart chakra, which is the giving and receiving of love, and it needs to have the lower chakras open and clear so there is no judgement of the self, so one may love and accept the self. Q’uo moved on to the blue chakra of clear communication that can be blocked when one gives advice that has not been requested, so sometimes the best service one can offer from the blue ray is to wait until one has been asked for their opinion. Then Q’uo moved to the violet chakra which they described as being fixed in its reflection of the balance in the lower chakras. They also said that power of the violet chakra can be balanced by working on the green chakra and the blue chakra in two meditations before moving back to the violet chakra. Q’uo went on to say that doing these balancing exercises is a way of nurturing the self by paying attention to one’s spiritual path. On August 26, 1992, Q’uo emphasized the value of paying attention to one’s spiritual path:

I am Q’uo, and we would respond by suggesting that it is appropriate that each seeker feel a certain amount of doubt as it approaches a new experience upon the spiritual path. For this kind of doubt or questioning is that which prepares the seeker in an inner sense to take the step from the cliff not knowing whether the foot that steps shall rest upon firm fundament or not. Thus, if there is interest upon your heart and doubt in your ability, we recommend that you rely upon that desire which you feel and that you put aside for the moment the doubt in order that your journey may continue along that path which is designated by the passion and desire within you.

Now, you may note that we moved from blue to violet. That is because that of which we are speaking, the time to work with the self, is the function and the only function of the indigo ray! This ray works completely within the self, and only upon the self. To find the discipline to spend time upon the self’s spiritual welfare is more of a challenge than finding the time to attend to another’s spiritual or bodily or emotional or mental welfare. We cannot stress enough the importance of this point. Think you that one of the highest of energies possible within the self, in terms of subtlety and strength, is somehow to take the very back seat, nay, even the trunk of the automobile of life? Please see and honor the instrument that you are, no matter what outward way you treat yourself, you love yourself, you give to yourself.

The first gift of the spiritual wayfarer is the time and the energy to move within, to work upon the discipline of the personality, that more and more of the personality may be imbued with the indigo ray of joyful accepting love of self. Consider the usual indigo ray of the underdeveloped student as a pool. The polarity of service to others fills this pool, but it is simply rain falling into a conserving receptacle, a still pool within one, until it has been enlivened by the acceptance of love that is beyond the possible love when judgment remains. Until this block is removed, this pool of polarity remains still and lacking in appropriate propinquity to the…

[Side one of tape ends.]

…There’s a moment when the pool of polarity within is opened to what lies beyond acceptance of the self. Then it becomes a truly potent force within the life, as though a fountain or spring came forth from that still pool, and sprayed and dropped like rain into each present moment; so that no key must be turned to start up the engine of self-acceptance which opens the door to unconditional channeling of infinite love through one. The key is already inserted. The work is being done within in such a way to genetically affect the energies of polarized beingness.

Thus, if you now feel that you are accepting yourself over and over and over, the secret may be that the gifts you give yourself do not include the appropriate concern for inner loving work. Not so that discrimination becomes judgment, but so that the powers of discrimination within you may help you to become that which you are, but have not realized or allowed yourself to be. And why? Because you fear to look too closely. You have heard those thoughts. So, all becomes fearful at a deep level.

We ask you to free yourself from this fearing of thoughts deemed unworthy. We assume in general that entities in service to others have largely mastered the techniques of avoiding manifesting of unacceptable actions, and so we concentrate on what is considered by the self to be unacceptable thoughts or intentions. Let us gaze for the last of these thoughts at this fear. The one known as Aaron, as spoken through the one known as Barbara, has said in this group that fear is not a bad or wrong thing; it is therefore a reason, it is a good protection until the self is ready to deal with it. Then and only then, may one sit down with the fear, gaze at it, picture the self within the cave with the—we correct this instrument—opening to the cave blocked by many bands that hide the light from one.

This is the fear, and no fear is greater to the good, gentle, and kind of heart than the fear of finding the canker within. It need not be thrown away from the mouth of the cave all at once, for this might do damage to the fearful self. Take one band away, and see if that much freedom from fear is comfortable. When it is, move to take another, and another, but have the patience with the self to accept less than perfect deliverance from that fear of unworthiness at any one sitting. You have infinite time to do this work, but in each present moment, you have only that moment to do this work. Therefore, be importuning for the present moment, yet patient in the long view. If the self cannot or is fearful to do this work now, return to the image of being held in the arms of the infinite One, and rocked and lullabied and loved, for this is your true state at a deep, deep level. How you are loved! How you are loved! Feel that. Know that. Spend time with that. When you feel how much you are already loved by the infinite One, how treasured you are, then you can gain courage to go ahead and walk the King’s Highway, and do the work of falling in love with the self, even in its illusory rampant imperfection.

Now Q’uo said that the indigo chakra is concerned with the discipline of the personality of working upon the self and only upon the self in a manner in which one learns to joyfully love the self which then becomes a potent force of being able to channel the unconditional infinite love through one’s being. Then Q’uo said that if we try again and again to accept ourselves but are unable to do it that we may look within ourselves to see if there is any judgement of ourselves or fear that we are still unworthy that is manifesting as inappropriate thoughts and intentions. They said that the best way to deal with this kind of fear was to work with each inappropriate thought or intention in the present moment, discarding one and then seeing how it feels to be without it. Then at another time Q’uo said that we should discard another inappropriate thought slowly, being very patient, and if necessary to return to being held in the arms of the One, rocked gently in Its Love, and to feel how loved and treasured we are, and then we can continue to do the work of falling in love with our self even with all of our illusory imperfections. On February 15, 2004, Q’uo spoke of the value of falling in love with our selves:

The harder and more fervent the desire to be of the light and to serve at one’s highest and best, the more sharply delineated are those portions of the shadow side of yourself that have not come into full harmony and acceptance within the self as loved, forgiven, and redeemed. Only you as a self, falling in love with the self and going through a full circuit of forgiving, accepting, redeeming of self, can do the work that enables one not to have the chinks in the armor, as this instrument would say, of light. That armor of light shall always have chinks. It shall always, within third-density incarnation, be imperfect, because, were you able to be perfect, it would be time for you to move on, and you would simply not any longer be of third density. You would go through the experience of physical death so that your energy body, your soul, would be free to move into a more appropriate garment for continuing your experience.

What an illusion you have, my dear, dear ones. What a magnificent bubble of utter confusion. You are brave souls to sail forth in this chaotic illusion. May you be to each other the beacons that bespeak love for and to each other. We send our love and light to you through this instrument, and would at this time transfer this contact to the one known as Jim, that it may conclude this working. We are those of Q’uo.

This morning I went outside and weeded the Morning Glory garden in the middle of the cross in the back yard, and then I put netting around it to protect the new sprouts from the deer. Then I drove to Thieneman’s Nursery and bought another 60 SunPatiens. On the way home I stopped at Feeder’s Supply to buy some fish food since I am now feeding them daily since the weather has warmed up. Then I stopped at Paul’s Fruit Market to buy some food for myself. My last stop was at Walgreen’s Drug Store where I bought some Pepsi Zero, Diet Coke, and some non-food items. When I got home I finished transplanting the Flower Fall in the front yard with SunPatiens.

This afternoon I transplanted the remainder of the SunPatiens in the Sun Mandala in the back yard behind the garage and discovered that I needed to go back to Thieneman’s Nursery to buy another 30 SunPatiens to finish the Sun Mandala. I also bought three flats of Dianthus.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 16

At One With Love

I am of the principle of Jesus the Christ and I greet you in the full consciousness of love.

Become very quiet. This moment is the linchpin of your busy day. This is your moment of communion. This is your heavenly meal.

For in this silence, in this moment, as your heart opens its inner door, so may you become Christed, at one with love. Thus the roots of your spirit are fed and you are given the strength to do that which it is for you to do this day.

Perhaps you will move very quickly this day. The spirit moves quickly with you. Remember as the day goes by to touch into that place of communion in the heart and you will find that love is always with you, as Jesus the Christ said, until the end of the age.

Root yourself in heaven and give your fruit to the world of the Creator that many think is the world of humankind. Let the smile upon your face be a smile knowing of the untruth of a world ever without love.

For love is in the midst of you. Love has created you. Love sustains you. And love will give you work to do. At the end of your silence, at the end of your listening, go gladly to that work and rejoice that you are alive to experience the love in this day, with these challenges.

We leave you in love and peace, now and forever. Amen.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.

I did the Morning Offering and then got myself ready for the day. Today the Q’uo quote comes from June 14, 1992:

The question this afternoon has to deal with the phenomenon of the visitation of a third-density human being by a negatively-oriented entity or energy that is sent from another third-density human being practicing what is usually called the black magical arts. We are wondering how the person receiving this energy or another wishing to help this person receiving this negative energy would deal with it. What is the best attitude, the best actions and the principles that need to be considered when dealing with negatively oriented visitations, whether of an entity or an energy?

(Carla channeling)

I am Q’uo. Greetings in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are most blessed to greet each of you this day, especially welcoming one new to our circle, the one known as K. Those of Oxal greet the one known as H, and are with this entity in silent enjoyment during this period. We are honored to have the privilege of being called to your group to speak of negative entities among your own people, and to speak also of those non-physical principles and entities which may be called upon by those within your density who are polarizing upon the path of service to self or negativity.

Let us first define the term black arts or black magical art. The metaphysical—both of the service-to-others path and the service-to-self path—is that which takes place upon a field which appears to be dark. The background of metaphysical work for both polarities is a metaphysical environment of darkness, for the metaphysical consciousness of the living spirit within third-density illusion is hidden within the deep and unlit roots of mind. Consequently, both those who seek the darkness and those who seek the light begin in a common ground of darkness, the darkness of that which is not known.

Upon this level of seeking for energy or power the search for truth is conducted in night conditions. The moon’s dimmest light is the brightest illumination as one seeks spiritually. It is extremely subtle and difficult work to distinguish truth from [inaudible] or outright falsity, to distinguish the positive leaning towards the love of the infinite One in service to others from the same activity which may seek service to self. Many are those metaphysical seekers who expect that the seeking towards the positive truth will be done in noonday sun metaphysically speaking; this is untrue. The metaphysical search is not clear, obvious, or simple. Each of you here who listens to this voice speaking our thoughts knows of the case of mistaking apparent truth for truth, and can recall instances in which that which one thought one had discovered to be a shining light was instead relatively valueless and not filled with light or power.

In the dim moonlight, shadows can be deceiving. The metaphysical search, then, is one in which faith is the great illuminator, that faith which cannot be given by one to another, that faith which each gestates within the spiritual part of the mind and body so that there becomes a faith which is personal, founded by the self.

The group question for this session was: How do we deal with negative energies that are sent to us from a negative third-density being? Q’uo began by dealing with the concept of the black magical arts as a process which occurs in darkness as also does the positive path because the metaphysical consciousness of spirit in the third-density illusion is hidden within the darkness of the deep roots of the mind which are not known. They said that under these conditions it is very difficult to distinguish truth from apparent truth or falsity, and it is very easy to make mistakes so that it is necessary to use one’s personal faith of the spirit to illuminate the darkness. On November 4, 1990, Q’uo spoke of the value of using faith to bloom in the darkness:

The illusion creates an emotional, mental, and spiritual twilight in which ideals, the purification of emotions from attachments, and the mindfulness of continuing awareness of the worship bloom in the darkness of blind faith. That is, the true worship is worship of a mystery; awe, wonder, a greater and greater subjective feeling of being held firmly by that which is not illusion, although one cannot understand it, so that the entity rests at last in a completely subjective and subjectively truthful journey. In this regard, worship may be seen as motion, motion of a metaphysical kind rather than a physical kind.

Now we return to a view of how to deal with negative entities. As a positively polarized person living a life in faith, one is prone to feel safe in the arms of the good, the true, and the beautiful. However, the entity upon the negative path feels that there is no safety, feels that there is no haven, feels that it and only it shall be the one to be counted upon, relied upon. Therefore, this entity wishes to build personal power with a greater initial reason and impetus for building a magical personality. Furthermore, this magical personality is simpler to build than the positively oriented magical personality. The negative entity need only attempt to collect to the self all possible power of any kind whatsoever without the need for discrimination or judgment.

The positively polarized entity instead is moving through processes of balancing the seemingly opposite of all things to ascertain the most careful balance of truth, of beauty, of goodness, for to the positively oriented entity it is clear that the illusion has the appearance of a bias toward negative events and circumstances. In order to clarify right action and the positive use of power, careful balancing of all stimulus needs must be done. Thus, each of you has the seemingly more difficult task in living a chosen life of faith, for both paths are given by the one infinite Creator. Although the Creator offers suggestions implicit in experience that the positive path of serving others is preferable and more to be desired, the negative path beckons, and it too is also effective, as this instrument would say, godly in that there is no energy [but] that of the one infinite Creator.

Further, the nature of your experience in third density offers simpler beginnings to a metaphysical base of power for those which choose negativity. What is not obvious is that the negative path becomes more and more difficult, until at last it is a road impossible to be walked, whereas the positive path is eternal.

Therefore, one who is assaulted by word, dream, feeling or other action by a negatively polarized entity of third density is dealing with not only a godly person but his own self, for all are one in the creation of the Father. In each mind, body and spirit which together make up the person there is all that there is. Each person is an holograph of the creation, the created and the Creator.

Now Q’uo began to describe how the positive entity utilizes the balancing exercises to ascertain the nature of what is true, good, and beautiful since the third-density illusion has a bias towards negativity and requires the positive entity to live a life in faith. Q’uo continued by saying that even though the Creator has a bias toward positivity, the negative path is also offered as a simpler choice for negativity as a spiritual path, even though it becomes more difficult to travel and must end at some point, whereas the positive path is eternal. Then Q’uo said that when a positive person is assaulted by a negative entity they are dealing with an equally godly person as their own self and of the Creator, for all are one. In 7.15, Ra described the equality of the positive and negative paths:

The Law of One blinks neither at the light or the darkness, but is available for service to others and service to self. However, service to others results in service to self, thus preserving and further harmonizing the distortions of those entities seeking intelligent infinity through these disciplines.

Thusly, when negative greeting is known or suspected the positively oriented person of power sits down and prepares itself to reckon with its own universal nature. It is fully capable and fully supplied with negativity. The perceived negativity from the outside in is successful when the positively oriented intended victim knows not that it is being greeted by its very self. If a ravening beast comes at one’s body, one attempts to slay that beast to save the self. If a metaphysical ravening beast attacks one in the manner of magical arts, one reckons with this attack by visualizing this creature, welcoming it into the self, and accepting fully that this horrible monster is a part of the self.

When one chooses a path one has the full spectrum from which to choose precisely because one contains all that there is. The first defense, therefore, is to visualize this negative power and fearlessly to invite it to take up a loving absorption within the very heart, for positive power is power balanced by knowledge of the self. The decision not to attempt power over another is made when the entity grasps that there is no need to have power over others, for all of creation expresses its power in the self. All magical work, therefore, is done upon the self. There is no need to manipulate, teach, control, move or advise other entities. The need is only to do these things within the self, disciplining the self to a more and more balanced and clear acceptance of the universal nature of selfhood, and therefore choosing lucidly and clearly to serve others, to withhold judgment of or control over others, and to practice loving the self, accepting the self and allowing the errors perceived within the self to be self-forgiven.

As one forgives one’s self, one then is able to forgive all. As the negative greeting is seen, then it is visualized and made materially real within the metaphysical world of thought as a creature of the night, a mythical creature which then is lovingly absorbed, accepted, and forgiven. The forgiven selfishness becomes harmless. This alone is enough to dissuade most negative third density entities who are wishing to control others, for most are not particularly skillful. Being accepted is unacceptable to a negatively oriented entity, who gains power by causing fear, anger, hatred, disgust and other negative reactions of emotion.

When this entity’s selfhood is seen for its blackness, yet lovingly, compassionately accepted, absorbed into a strong goodness of self and forgiven, the negative entity experiences loss of all [inaudible] power and chooses to attempt to control others who will be satisfactorily afraid and terrorized by such. In the case of the very few who have the energy and endurance to pursue the path of control over others to the point where they are able directly to contact metaphysical sources of negativity, the situation, while no less solvable, is not as easy and simple to deal with from the standpoint of the one greeted. Again, in the unthinking person of third density, the response to perceived attack is counter-attack.

It takes a good deal of wisdom to be able to calmly and objectively gaze upon the face of metaphysical malevolence, for those who have contacted those metaphysical sources which are of fourth density have garnered to themselves two things. One is a third-density personality within incarnation of sureness and confidence. There is in such entity a true blackness of spirit, a honed hatred which sees no shadows. The positive path is full of shadows, of questions and doubts, of continual learning and balance. The choice for positivity is not the choice for simplicity of early lessons. The choice for negativity is a choice for simplicity of early lessons. Thusly, an entity which is negative has an apparent advantage once it has progressed to a certain point of being absolutely sure of the self without the need for faith, whereas the positively polarized entity is still dealing with the endless and confusing shadows of the spiritual landscape, which is lit by the dim star of hope and the thin, delicate moonlight of faith.

In this situation where there is not only the living incarnate negative entity who greets one but also the spirit of higher density cooperating in its peculiar manner in this negatively oriented entity, the positive path must be seen to be a place of hope and faith which are accepted without proof. The positive pilgrim takes into the heart a strong desire to leap foolishly into the abyss of the unknown, unprotected by certainty, facing in mid-air the seeming destruction of personal safety, clinging to nothing but a faith that all is well and that there is nothing to fear. Many are the loving and positively oriented souls who yet are not able to do this. When such entities are greeted by these relatively powerful negative sources the most—we search this instrument’s mind for the appropriate word—practical solution is to find one among your people which is positive in nature and is steeped in rituals of positivity, which include in their language the seeking of the greeting of fourth-density or higher positive metaphysical entities. Such people are the so-called priests of various of your religious belief systems which believes in the war betwixt good and evil. This war is fought by fourth-density negative entities and fourth-density positive entities which still believe that a battle is appropriate.

Now Q’uo said that when a positive person feels the attack from a negative source it may deal with it by seeing that it is a part of its self that is offering the attack, as it is part of all that is, and should welcome the attack into its heart. Then Q’uo said that by seeing the universal nature of the self, the person may forgive any failings of the self, and forgive the negative entity as well. Then Q’uo said that this acceptance and forgiveness of the negative entity is unacceptable to the negative entity because it gains power by causing fear and loses power by being loved and forgiven. Q’uo said that this process by the positive entity is one which requires a good deal of faith that all is truly well when the third density is full of shadows, of questions and doubts, of continual learning and balance while the negative entity has a simpler path where it is sure of its self and needs no faith. Then Q’uo said that the positive entity must “take into the heart a strong desire to leap foolishly into the abyss of the unknown, unprotected by certainty, facing in mid-air the seeming destruction of personal safety, clinging to nothing but a faith that all is well and that there is nothing to fear.” On February 13, 2010, Q’uo revealed the value of leaping into the abyss:

Now, what is faith? What is that leap into faith, which is not obvious and is not provable? How does that work? There comes a time for each seeker when there is a choice-point at which he must choose to act in faith that all is well in spite of evidence of the contrary, or to retreat in fear into a cave of his own imagining and to be thusly limited.

It is after an entity has chosen by faith to take that leap into faith that faith begins to prove itself a sturdy place to set one’s foot. It is only after the leap into the abyss of the unproven and mysterious that one gains one’s sure footing and becomes fearless and willing to be that entity whose approach to life is to look for love. With the veil in place, the decision to leap into faith has great weight and value.

It is a risky thing to do. It feels risky. It takes courage, integrity and will. It takes that of which the one known as G was speaking as a focus of desire, a seeking, a hunger, a thirst for the Creator, for truth, for love, for beauty. Therefore, there is tremendous intensity and power given to the one who makes that choice in faith.

Before we leave this topic we would focus once more upon the mysterious and fertile land of spiritual choice, the dark world within. Each of you gaze within. Do you feel magical? Do you feel powerful? If the answer comes too easily it is likely that there is that within you which would choose the easy way towards power, that is, the path of negativity, for each step upon the negative path seems from within to be positive: one wishes power so that one may help people; the way to help people is to give advice, give teaching; make sure that all is well by controlling various people and circumstances. All these things feel natural and good. Most beginning negative entities have no idea that they are embarking upon the path of negativity.

Contrasting with this is the positive path, where power is accrued by being the weakest, and greatness is achieved by being the servant of others, where advice and teaching are given only when asked for. How many among your religious systems, caught up in the fervor of rightness and righteousness, judge, condemn, and control many for their own good? How few there are in your belief systems of religion who ignore doctrine and dogma and seek to serve each entity according to its requests when it can, and offering only benediction, forgiveness, and acceptance when it cannot. Yet to those few who know themselves well enough not to judge, not to control others, but to work on the self, to these few come strength, magical power and illumination of incandescent light which shoots through that darkness of metaphysical field like lightning. The world, as this instrument would say, cannot see that lightning. Only each individual pilgrim upon the positive path who moves into a life in faith, a life without fear, may be illumined. It moves through one, it does not stay with one. And such entities are channels of joy and peace.

Whether the greeting of negative entities seems, or seems not to succeed, such entities are forever safe in spirit. We are those of the positive path. We are also dusty pilgrims who have searched long in the shadows of hope and faith. We do not expect third-density entities to be without fear. We simply ask entities who wish to live in faith not to be afraid of their fear, not to be ruled by their fear, but to accept this fear, to love this fear, as part of the universal self, and to move on, leaping foolishly into the next step in blindness and in faith. May each of you find each step to be one which is offered to the infinite One as a gift, a testimony of love, for if the Creator is love, then the choice of fearlessness is always correct.

We encourage each to be patient, forgiving, accepting and slow with each fear that keeps it from progressing. Take time to work through the balancing of that fear, overcome it never, but take it within the self, love it, accept it, and gently, strand by strand, part the curtain that keeps the self from progressing fearlessly. This is slow work but it moves one ever towards the truth, the good, and the beautiful.

Now Q’uo suggested that we look within ourselves to that fertile and mysterious land of spiritual choice and ask ourselves if we feel magical and powerful. Then they warned us that if we feel the answer is “yes,” that we may be opening ourselves to the negative path that would use these qualities to control others for their own good and, thusly, begin the negative path. They described the positive path as one in which power is gained by being the weakest, and greatness comes from serving others, and teaching is given only after being asked, and then they said that: “Yet to those few who know themselves well enough not to judge, not to control others, but to work on the self, to these few come strength, magical power and illumination of incandescent light which shoots through that darkness of metaphysical field like lightning.” Then they said that by living in faith that this is true, we can become channels of joy and peace that do not live in fear but accept and love it as part of our universal self so that we can continue to leap into the next step of our spiritual journey in blindness and in faith. Q’uo completed their response by saying that each step on our journey is a gift to the infinite One as a testimony of love, for if the Creator is love then fearlessness is always a good choice.  On February 27, 1983, Hatonn recommended fearlessness as a critical part of our spiritual journey:

You think, “My will is strong and my heart shall be light, and I shall meet all obstacles with love, that love that I know, that love that I feel, that love that I seek.” And yet, these things you do not always do. You do not know. It is the seeking, continuous, balanced between seriousness and joy, fresh each day, that accelerates your rate, speed, and leads you upon an ever-narrower path.

And this, my friends, is good, for it is the narrow path, the path of courage, the path of fearlessness in the face of not knowing that will grant you more and more a sense of being able to reach into the resources of your higher self, of your deeper self, of your inner self, of Christ consciousness, and manifest the true joy of faith and will. It has often been noted that justice is blind among your peoples. We would further note, so is love, so is seeking. Do not let the dimness of your mirror images ever discourage you for long. Do not let your own lack of manifestation ever discourage you for long. Do not let any error, as you may consider it, discourage you for long, for this creation is the Creator’s. You live in a creation of love and in an illusion of mystery. See far enough to find the love and have the courage to release yourself from the responsibility of certain knowledge. Those who are certain about philosophy and those things of the spiritual evolution have simply placed themselves on a slower path where they will be borne upon the shoulders of their comrades, given more encouragement, offered frequent rests, and sustained by many comforts. Courage, my friends. You who have it shall inherit a great mystery of being as can no one who seeks certain knowledge. You seek the wind. It is invisible, it is infinite, and it will come and go when it will. Do you suggest that you shall know it, that you shall measure it, and put it between the pages of a book? Or do you instead seek to be it? Lift your wings, my friends, and soar in the love and the light that is yours for the seeking, yours for the taking, and yours to manifest in glory.

We would at this time transfer this contact to the one known as Jim. We thank this instrument and the [inaudible] and in light. We are known to you as Q’uo.

(Jim channeling)

I am Q’uo, and greet each again in love and in light through this instrument. We are aware that we have spoken long and apologize for the length of our delivery. We are aware that we have fatigue in the circle [inaudible]. We are, however, privileged to offer ourselves at this time for any further queries that you may have for us. Is there a query at this time?

[Pause]

I am Q’uo, and we shall take this opportunity to thank each once again for inviting our presence into your circle of seeking this day. We are most filled with joy to be able to walk with you upon your journey at this time. We shall now leave this instrument and this group, leaving each, as always, in the love and in the light of the one infinite Creator. We are known to you as those of Q’uo. Adonai, my friends. Adonai.

This morning I went outside and used my nippers to remove one dead stalk of the Oak Leaf Hydrangea in front of the front porch and also trimmed off all the old blooms from last year. Then I used my trimmer to trim the weeds out of the Moss Garden and out of the Nandina Garden beside the fishpond.

This afternoon I drove over to Thieneman’s Nursery and bought 60  SunPatiens to plant in the Flower Fall Mound in the front yard since that was all my car could hold. When I got home I transplanted them into about half of the Flower Mound, so I will need to buy that many more tomorrow. Then I noticed that the water quality in the fishpond had gone down a lot as had the height of the fountain, so I drained half of the water out and refilled the pond with fresh water.

From A Book of Days, channeled by Carla L. Rueckert:

April 15

You Seek The Uncreated Things

I am of the consciousness of love and I greet you in the name of Jesus the Christ.

I am the spirit, created before all worlds and uncreated, attaching creation to un-creation in the fullness of the Father.

Before your minds lie things created. And yet you seek the uncreated things, that which you call the mystery. You need seek no further than the depths and recesses of your being. Each soul is uncreated as well as created, potential as well as active, unstructured as well as infinite, full and whole, with a wholeness of that which is not created but merely is a gift.

For love is that substance which not only is created but creates its own creation from itself. Never fear that you shall lack, in the spirit of love, to be able to offer love in any amount if you but seek the uncreated strength and fullness of the spirit of Jesus Christ. Infinity lies within you and light which seems inaccessible to the eyes is accessible in prayer.

We leave you in the peace of wholeness, now and ever.

I said the prayer at the Gaia Meditation tonight:

We come in the name of love and open our hearts, minds, and souls to send love, light, and healing energy to Mother Earth as she brings forth a new Earth in the fourth density. We ask that the infinite love, light and healing energy of the One Infinite Creator heal the hearts of all souls in pain on Earth tonight. May all souls on Earth feel our love, light, and healing energy in their hearts, their minds, and their souls. Amen.