Thoughts on mental illness...

[Jewells]

Hello All!
I've just joined this wonderful site in the hopes that I may meet other like-minded souls, & who hopefully, help me understand & gain insight on the many subjects discussed on here.

I only discovered the 'Ra' material in June this year, & can say that it answered many questions & confirmed many beliefs that I hold.

I'll apologize in advance if my posts are a bit 'muddled' at times, but I am in the midst of a major depression, & am finding it hard to articulate many of the thoughts/feelings that I'm experiencing at this time.
I hope you can all bear with me.

I've struggled with anxiety attacks & depression for the last 30 years (I'm 44).
I've been a sole parent to 3 children aged 19, 18 & 11 for 95% of that time.
I have always searched for help/answers to overcome my challenges, but have never been successful in any long term sense.
I find that I have no self confidence in spite of being considered 'attractive', & feel increasingly 'dumb', even though I've pretty much built a home for my children & I from the 'ground up'.
I've struggled endlessly with these feelings my entire life, & even though my common sense dictates they are untrue, they remain stronger than ever at this time.
I can't even begin to describe how exhausted I am mentally/spiritually/emotionally. This battle has been relentless for so many years and I am at the end of my tether.
I've always believed in Jesus & God and prayed daily throughout this(Most times by the minute just to get through a day!),& believe they are the reason I am still here persisting.
I could go on & on,but I will get to the purpose of my seeking here.
I would like your thoughts & opinions on mental illness.
Although I am not considered 'inpatient material' (Though I've had doubts about that!!), I can never seem to ever be 'well'.
My poor children have suffered this journey with me, which only compounds my feelings of guilt no end, as its affected us ALL. I have contemplated suicide many times because of these feelings that I'm doing more harm to them by 'staying', but always reject that in the end because of the hurt & trauma this would put them through.(My whole purpose of being here is to love & protect them, my only purpose.)
And so I stay, in this hell. I have no friends/family to discuss these types of issues (It only serves to prove to them how 'unhinged' I am) I seem to have alienated everyone, & whilst this is very painful, it is far worse to be around people that only care about "Kim & the kardashians' or their new iphone etc. The small country town I live in has no groups etc where I could find others like me.
My question is ,is mental illness a catalyst, is it something I'm supposed to learn from (Believe me I try soooo hard!). Am I supposed to ever get better, or do I have to try & accept it (Very hard to do when I see the pain it causes my children)? Because my thoughts are sooo scattered ,I feel I can't even pray properly at the moment.Will God forgive me & understand my limitations? I'm not baptized (my family were not religious, nor were friends) so this area is very foreign to me. I don't feel comfortable just showing up to a church (confidence thing!).
Any advice or insight from a clearer mind would be very appreciated.
Thank you for listening to me.
x

[apeiron]

I am posing this as a question mainly but is there such a thing as mental illness?

Other than altered states (alcohol, drugs, mushrooms, etc., psychosis brought about by these and some other extreme catalysts besides chakra blockages, what are the definitions of a mental illness?

Besides, body complex (brain) effects of injury, accident, are not many of those so called mental illness a pre-incarnational arrrangement to learn certain lessons?

We can also consider negative attacks and those only have effect aggrandizing current pessimistic or negative emotional states (if allowed by you) already present in the entity.

[BrownEye]

Mental and nervous system activity works like it is supposed to if you have all minerals needed to function properly. You can see how copper and gold are commonly used for electrical transfer, your body also needs minerals to have full electrical transfer.

We know that vitamins can have a large effect on the sense of well being also, good vitamin D being one of them.

I think I would look for something wrong in what you are doing, rather than something wrong with "you".

[apeiron]

I think you have some chakra blockages, orange, yellow & blue come to mind.

Depression seems a blockage indeed.

Do you meditate?

[zenmaster]

My question is ,is mental illness a catalyst, is it something I'm supposed to learn from (Believe me I try soooo hard!).

Of course it is catalyst, as is everything. Nothing is "exempt" from being catalyst.

Am I supposed to ever get better, or do I have to try & accept it (Very hard to do when I see the pain it causes my children)?

You must accept your condition, whatever it may be, in order to address it. But "accept" does not mean resignation, it means embracing the condition in order to know where to go from "there". There is no difficulty which can not be addressed more effectively by a more conscious attitude. Find out about it and own it if you can.

[Whitefeather]

...
My question is ,is mental illness a catalyst, is it something I'm supposed to learn from (Believe me I try soooo hard!). Am I supposed to ever get better, or do I have to try & accept it (Very hard to do when I see the pain it causes my children)? Because my thoughts are sooo scattered ,I feel I can't even pray properly at the moment.Will God forgive me & understand my limitations?
Any advice or insight from a clearer mind would be very appreciated.
Thank you for listening to me.
x

Hi Jewells,

There is that one main catalyst with many different facets, it resolves by looking for the love in everything.

On the health side, many suffer from some kind of toxins such as Heavy metals or food intolerance or allergies or toxins from medical drugs... For others, it is electro smog or phone mast or tv... Have you spoken with your medical doctor?

Be well and take care

[Jewells]

I am posing this as a question mainly but is there such a thing as mental illness?

Other than altered states (alcohol, drugs, mushrooms, etc., psychosis brought about by these and some other extreme catalysts besides chakra blockages, what are the definitions of a mental illness?

Besides, body complex (brain) effects of injury, accident, are not many of those so called mental illness a pre-incarnational arrrangement to learn certain lessons?

We can also consider negative attacks and those only have effect aggrandizing current pessimistic or negative emotional states (if allowed by you) already present in the entity.

Hi Apeiron,
No I don't do drugs, etc (alcohol rarely).
The chakra is interesting, as I'm sure mine must be blocked. Communications is proving increasingly hard for me (I think thats the blue chakra?), but I will en devour to learn more about unblocking.

I only became aware of psychic attacks after reading the Ra material, & do try to look at it all as an opportunity for growth & to work on myself.
I send love, light & thanks for these opportunities. Though there are some days that i feel that is all I am doing, but I try to keep striving for the light in each situation.
Thank you for your reply

---

Mental and nervous system activity works like it is supposed to if you have all minerals needed to function properly. You can see how copper and gold are commonly used for electrical transfer, your body also needs minerals to have full electrical transfer.

We know that vitamins can have a large effect on the sense of well being also, good vitamin D being one of them.

I think I would look for something wrong in what you are doing, rather than something wrong with "you".

Hi Pickle!
(I didnt realize I had any responses till I scrolled down!! Derp!)

Thank you for your reply.I've never heard of electrical transfers before.
My diet HAS been rubbish over the last couple of weeks, (Unlike me!!) so I think thats something I will have to have a good look at.
I take fish oil, evening primrose, garlic, vit C but haven't tried vitamin D, so
will give that a try.
And a very big thanks for your last line. I've been so busy flaming myself, it never occurred to me that it could be something I'm doing wrong.
Nameste

---

...
My question is ,is mental illness a catalyst, is it something I'm supposed to learn from (Believe me I try soooo hard!). Am I supposed to ever get better, or do I have to try & accept it (Very hard to do when I see the pain it causes my children)? Because my thoughts are sooo scattered ,I feel I can't even pray properly at the moment.Will God forgive me & understand my limitations?
Any advice or insight from a clearer mind would be very appreciated.
Thank you for listening to me.
x

Hi Jewells,

There is that one main catalyst with many different facets, it resolves by looking for the love in everything.

On the health side, many suffer from some kind of toxins such as Heavy metals or food intolerance or allergies or toxins from medical drugs... For others, it is electro smog or phone mast or tv... Have you spoken with your medical doctor?

Be well and take care

Hi Whitefeather,
Great advice, thank you!
I think it could be any of the above, in particular electro smog.
I am going to look into some diets & see if that may help.
(I feel a bit silly not thinking of that myself!)
Over the years I spoken with doctors many times, tried anti depressants, psychiatrists, psychologists etc, all of which had no effect.
The most helpful thing I've found is the Ra material, & that different perspective has helped.
I think as I have other worries at this times, 18yo son with depression, mother with dementia (& she was my only 'rock'), I'm feeling particularly alone at this time.
I was actually thinking of trying anti depressants again, which shows how desperate I feel as I HATE those things, but will give the diet & 'de-smog' a go first.
Thank you again
Jewels

---

My question is ,is mental illness a catalyst, is it something I'm supposed to learn from (Believe me I try soooo hard!).

Of course it is catalyst, as is everything. Nothing is "exempt" from being catalyst.

Am I supposed to ever get better, or do I have to try & accept it (Very hard to do when I see the pain it causes my children)?

You must accept your condition, whatever it may be, in order to address it. But "accept" does not mean resignation, it means embracing the condition in order to know where to go from "there". There is no difficulty which can not be addressed more effectively by a more conscious attitude. Find out about it and own it if you can.

Hi Zenmaster,
Lol, that sounds like a 'Ra' answer,thank you! Its funny because thats what I thought I was doing but maybe just not quite the right way yet:-/
but it definitely did help with my anxiety attacks which have improved 99%!!
I will keep trying!
Thank you

---

I think you have some chakra blockages, orange, yellow & blue come to mind.

Depression seems a blockage indeed.

Do you meditate?

Yes I'm trying to meditate but don't think I'm doing it quite right!
This is all very new to me, & I'm only just learning about the chakras now.
From what I've read so far I think they all may be blocked!
Its just unfortunate I live in such a small town as there are no places I can go to learn about these things.(I'm 3 hours away from the city).
I'll just have to read as much as possible for the time being.
Thanks again

[Oceania]

Pickle is right. deficiencies and other chemical imbalances cause mental illness. there is an actual physical problem. i think i lack lots of things, vitamin d for sure.

you sound british so you probably don't get a lot of sun. but i'd try to get as much as possible as well as take vitamin d. i'd also make sure to eat well, you could try maca, spirulina and gojiberries for proper food. try to eat organic stuff and fresh veggies and fruit. cut out the crap.

also there's skate or cod liver oil you get raw from greenpasture.org or another site for europe, it helps decalcify your pineal gland. i wouldn't take antidepressants unless really necessary. apparently prozac is made from fluoride.

it sounds like you do understand you are more than you think, and you should maybe tell yourself that. you've done well.

[Ruth]

Welcome, Jewells. Seems you've received some pretty good advice so far, so I'll just say welcome! And remind you that you are not alone, we are all here for you. I, too, have suffered with depression most of my life, and it was at it's worst when I still had teenagers in the home. They are grown now and life has settled down a bit for me which makes it easier to focus on taking care of myself more thoroughly.

The only thing I've done that I don't see recommended here is the use of full spectrum lights during the long winter months when I can't get much sunshine. That plus the vitamin D seems to help significantly.

Light and love to you, Jewells!

[apeiron]

This article was linked in another thread by Whitefeather and I think it is relevant and could help you (helped me too).

http://www.llresearch.org/newsletters/issues/2009_4.pdf

I agree with zenmaster not to repress the emotions since implications are more profound (in time-space); however, I find that using the imagination helps me to cope with negative situations without inflicting any damage on others.

I am still responsible in finding the balance for myself.

[Jewells]

Pickle is right. deficiencies and other chemical imbalances cause mental illness. there is an actual physical problem. i think i lack lots of things, vitamin d for sure.

you sound british so you probably don't get a lot of sun. but i'd try to get as much as possible as well as take vitamin d. i'd also make sure to eat well, you could try maca, spirulina and gojiberries for proper food. try to eat organic stuff and fresh veggies and fruit. cut out the crap.

also there's skate or cod liver oil you get raw from greenpasture.org or another site for europe, it helps decalcify your pineal gland. i wouldn't take antidepressants unless really necessary. apparently prozac is made from fluoride.

it sounds like you do understand you are more than you think, and you should maybe tell yourself that. you've done well.

Hi Oceania!
Lol,I just realized what vit D was, & why I dont take it- I live in a pretty warm part of Australia! The last 6 years has seen me building our house,building fences, landscaping gardens etc, so I'm outside alot of the time!
The diet is the most obvious culprit. Not having much money sees me buying poor quality food which I try to make healthy meals from. But the last few months stresses, mum ,son, trying to complete work on house etc, has seen me short of time & worse ,motivation. I've been relying on cheap, crappy, fast food which is addictive. This is the first thing I'm going to work on. (I'm ashamed to say I don't even KNOW what maca etc are but will find out!)
The cod liver oil (lol, can hear my mum now!) is interesting. My sister has a tumor in her pineal gland (they found it several years ago,very small & just monitoring it) so will let her know about that.
I'm just trying to plan my vege garden. I've bought some heirloom seeds but have to research more, as I truly know nothing! I've read a bit on hydroponic gardening & hope to set up a system. In the meantime I just have tomatos & potatoes!!!
The responses I've received have been an eyeopener.Reading your post really slammed it home! I've been so busy focusing on the internal & spiritual, that I've pretty much let my physical needs slide. Caring for others has seen me prioritize their needs first.Now when I look,I can see I've slowly given up everything I enjoy & need. Any wonder I've been feeling so bad! (Geez it seems so simple & obvious now)

Thank you all soooo much.

Sending much love, light & thanks to you all

---

This article was linked in another thread by Whitefeather and I think it is relevant and could help you (helped me too).

http://www.llresearch.org/newsletters/issues/2009_4.pdf

I agree with zenmaster not to repress the emotions since implications are more profound (in time-space); however, I find that using the imagination helps me to cope with negative situations without inflicting any damage on others.

I am still responsible in finding the balance for myself.

Hi Apeiron!
Thank you for the link! Thats just what I needed! I've only read the first couple of pages, but will have a good read tonight (when kids are in bed & theres peace!) It sounds great.
I agree too about repressing the emotions. It was getting me nowhere, & just seemed to make the catalyst ever present & more pronounced.
I'm going to try letting it flow & working with it.
I feel so much calmer & peaceful after speaking with you guys. It has helped regain a bit of much needed balance & perspective.
Thank you
Imagination is something you've drawn my attention to. The last couple of years I find I no longer fantasize the way I did when I was younger (I mean like, meeting someone special,seeing myself in a great job etc) My ability to do so seems broken. I've been too tired mentally/spiritually to bother -its seems like such hard work.
I will make more effort to visualize, because I truly believe that we make our own reality. The more I've focused on all the negatives in my life & trying to fix them, just resulted in creating more & more, until I was engulfed in negativity.
At least now I'm aware I can work on it (I'm feeling very optimistic
Thank you so much again for your help

---

Welcome, Jewells. Seems you've received some pretty good advice so far, so I'll just say welcome! And remind you that you are not alone, we are all here for you. I, too, have suffered with depression most of my life, and it was at it's worst when I still had teenagers in the home. They are grown now and life has settled down a bit for me which makes it easier to focus on taking care of myself more thoroughly.

The only thing I've done that I don't see recommended here is the use of full spectrum lights during the long winter months when I can't get much sunshine. That plus the vitamin D seems to help significantly.

Light and love to you, Jewells!

Awww thank you Ruth for the welcome & kind thoughts!

Lol, teenagers ARE a worry & do that to you! I completely understand what you mean about now having the time now to take care of yourself-theres very little while they're around!
I'm glad you have come through the worst of your depression- its such a nasty, powerful thing.I'm sure you've learnt alot having gone through it.
It definitely makes us more compassionate to others suffering, having felt such sharp bites ourselves.
Lol, I'm in Australia so theres plenty of sun! Maybe you should come visit me next winter
Thank you again, & lots of love and light to you!

[apeiron]

18.5 Questioner: Thank you. I have a question here that I will read: “Much of the mystic tradition of seeking on Earth holds the belief that the individual self must be erased or obliterated and the material world ignored for the individual to reach ‘nirvana,’ as it is called, or enlightenment. What is the proper role of the individual self and its worldly activities to aid an individual to grow more into the Law of One?”

Ra: I am Ra. The proper role of the entity is in this density to experience all things desired, to then analyze, understand, and accept these experiences, distilling from them the love/light within them. Nothing shall be overcome. That which is not needed falls away.

The orientation develops due to analysis of desire. These desires become more and more distorted towards conscious application of love/light as the entity furnishes itself with distilled experience. We have found it to be inappropriate in the extreme to encourage the overcoming of any desires, except to suggest the imagination rather than the carrying out in the physical plane, as you call it, of those desires not consonant with the Law of One, thus preserving the primal distortion of free will.

The reason it is unwise to overcome is that overcoming is an unbalanced action creating difficulties in balancing in the time/space continuum. Overcoming, thus, creates the further environment for holding on to that which apparently has been overcome.

All things are acceptable in the proper time for each entity, and in experiencing, in understanding, in accepting, in then sharing with other-selves, the appropriate distortion shall be moving away from distortions of one kind to distortions of another which may be more consonant with the Law of One.

It is, shall we say, a shortcut to simply ignore or overcome any desire. It must instead be understood and accepted. This takes patience and experience which can be analyzed with care, with compassion for self and for other-self.

[AnthroHeart]

Thank you aperion. The bold faced part really resonated with me. I was uncertain before of how to proceed.

[Whitefeather]

Thank you apeiron for reminding us of these beautiful words from Ra. It feels so harmonious...I simply love it...

Blessings to you Jewells. Enjoy your life and your beautiful children. Let them know they are the gift, that they are the gift in their life... like you are the gift in yours.... and probably also in each others' life.

[AnthroHeart]

Whitefeather, I always enjoy your posts. They are so light-filled.

[SomaticDreams]

I think you have some chakra blockages, orange, yellow & blue come to mind.

Depression seems a blockage indeed.

Do you meditate?

Yes I'm trying to meditate but don't think I'm doing it quite right!
This is all very new to me, & I'm only just learning about the chakras now.
From what I've read so far I think they all may be blocked!
Its just unfortunate I live in such a small town as there are no places I can go to learn about these things.(I'm 3 hours away from the city).
I'll just have to read as much as possible for the time being.
Thanks again
[/quote]

Hi Jewells,

Welcome to the forum. I am glad you found a way to express yourself.

I would suggest meditation, as this is the easiest method to listen to your mind, body and spirit.

I think shamata (calming) meditation is good for you at this point. This is simply observing thoughts without judgement.

The only two basic requirements for meditation is that you have a straight back and your body is relaxed. So meditation may be done on a chair, laying down, traditionally (in the lotus/ half lotus position), etc. As long as these two requirements are met. Find the balance. Don't stress out about how relaxed your body is, or if your back is straight enough. Just let your back be straight and relax your body. No need to over do it.

The point of meditation (in the Buddhist tradition at least) is to recognize your awareness. Your awareness is always with you, but your thoughts arise into this awareness, which cause you to judge things (I like this, I don't like this). In this way you are led into a world of desire and repulsion, which leads to suffering. The words of Ra resonate here with the Buddhist tradition that one must learn to accept these thoughts, feelings (physical), and emotions. You cannot overcome them, reject them, or hold onto them forever.

With that in mind, as you start to meditate, focus on an object of meditation (this may be anything you are thinking, or feeling at the time, emotionally or physically). Most beginners start with their breath, as it is natural and easy to follow. You always have to breath. Your eyes can be open or closed- it is a matter of preference. Look about a meter in front of you on the ground (if sitting), if your laying down, simply stare straight ahead, or close your eyes.

As you focus on your breath, thoughts will arise in your mind...and it may even seem at first that your mind is getting busier with thoughts. This is actually you recognizing how busy your mind really is. All you have to do is observe your thoughts, no judgements of them. Just say hello to them.

Let me relate this observer awareness to the two ways we usually react to our thoughts. We either obey them as if they are our boss, or we reject them, like they are our enemy.

For example if you hear a song you like, you think "I like this!" and you immediately believe that thought, or perhaps you stub your toe, and you think "OW!" and immediately think of how painful the sensation is. Likewise, if you smell something you don't like, you think "Yuck!" and immediately try to remove yourself from the smell, and if you feel an emotion and you think "I am sad" then you respond habitually as you always do when your sad.

So clearly, these two methods of relating to our thoughts in a judgmental fashion do not reveal their true nature to us. We must be like observers of our own thoughts, to see where they come from and where they go, how they arise and fall...how all phenomena are contingent, co-dependent and arising. This observer awareness can be equated to "making friends" with your thoughts. Welcome them! Love them! Greet them in your light and listen to them, as a good friend does to another. Just watch your thoughts as you follow your breath as your "ground".

If you get lost in thoughts, don't worry. Be gentle with yourself. Love yourself, and be compassionate. Say "That's okay. I am going to gently bring my awareness back to my breath".

Again, just watch your thoughts. Those moments of recognizing awareness are like drops of water into a bucket...eventually the bucket will fill up with these moments of awareness. You will be able to rest in awareness more and more. All it takes it practice- and the best part is; all meditation practice is productive practice! (Remember? There's no good or bad practice, just a friend who you listen to).

This is the most basic, and easiest meditation to start with. I know it will help you if you decide to utilize it. Be compassionate to yourself, so you may develop this love and be able to share it with those who you love, and even those who you might call enemy.

Much love to you. If you have any questions, let me know. Feel free to disregard this however, if this seems like something that will not help you. Do what "resonates" in the words of Q'uo. I do not know what is best for you, but I offer you this tool to help you, another me.

-SomaticDreams

[Whitefeather]

Whitefeather, I always enjoy your posts. They are so light-filled.

Thanks Gemini Wolf. As the say goes, 'it takes one to see one.'

:idea: