Financial Choices

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

So I picked up some extra hours at work.  56 this week total, then 48 next week.  Wasnt intending this, but catalyst called, I didn't run this time.  And the 56 hour week is over technically, with the 48 week starting today, 9 days straight of 10-6 work.

Whew, so I have extra money saved up, my Halloween is a bust...  So I need help B4.

Im going to spend money on my Son, my Car, my Mom, and I this holiday season.

Now I've already decided I'm getting myself a PS4 with Fallout 4 because I'm irresponsible and can barely afford such AFTER all my other options run dry. ($400)

I'm getting new tires, a new battery, and maybe a new EGR Valve on my car ($250, with EGR possibly $650)

My mother deserves something and since we don't know what communication is (me politely saying she's passively mean without realizing it and I usually avoid dealing with it) I want to do get her some kind of nice manny/peddy massage dealio and have no idea if it a good idea or if I should just give her 100 dollars to go buy herself a weeks worth of ganj...  since she literally burns through it in a weeks time though I honestly didn't want to help her with that overindulged habit... (100-150)

Then my Son, Three years old soon on 11/25...  I haven't seen him in so long.  And nothing I do or buy will make up for my absence.  Baby mama is impartial and apathetic towards me.
I want to punish myself and burn a good 200 dollars on my son.  I was thinking dr. Suess books and outside toys but if anyone has anything else in mind do tell.  I was going to send 'What is Love' the coloring book on L/L's library to him when he's 4 or 5 (its been sitting in my room for over a year).

I just don't know what to get him.  I was going to put off my Car's egr valve for another month to be able to afford everything for his birthday.  I don't even know my son.  Its really frustrating following in my own father's footsteps.  I'm already worried about my son being lonely or misunderstood like I was and my dad before me.

Anyways.

I have some saved up money, I want to treat my family, myself, and my future (car). Any suggestions on kids gifts or helpful things to consider for the holidays?

I don't have enough for everything now...i can get my son's birthday and Christmas presents soon, then my mom and car after that, then I.  Or maybe not in that order.

Its why I'm asking, I've got choices.  I'm going to be a bit liberal this year...its been incredibly rough on me ever since April.

[Jade]

Hey TTP, Godspeed to you on your crazy upcoming work weeks. I've worked some of these. Exhausting, but the promise of that big paycheck can help....

Here's my suggestions for you

I don't think you should frame it as "punishing" yourself to buy stuff for your kid. Also, I don't think setting a dollar value for penance will alleviate any of your guilt, just saying. For him, I would say make a box as a care package, lots of little gifts. No need to be extravagant. Lots of books and little toys, a lot of stuff for him to explore. A loving note/card, hopefully something his mom will save for him if she has a heart at all.

For your mom, I would suggest instead of a manny/peddy or ganj money to maybe buy her a massage instead? Can spend $60-100 for an hour long massage, it may not be a full week's worth of stoney relaxation but it may be a few days' worth. Might be able to do both (manny/peddy and massage) for around $100 or not much more. You could try the local cosmetology school to see if they have any great deals on something like that.

For you and your PS4, my suggestion is to sit on your hands until after Christmas and buy a used one... may save you up to $100 or more. That's just what I would probably do. Get the battery and tires for sure, if you need them - again, you can save buying used if you're frugal. I just got 4 decent used tires for about half of what new ones would be... they'll still last me a few years. Worth the save in the short term imo.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

I was thinking of making it an actual holiday present but that might be a good idea.

The anxiety involved with all of this is ridiculous though.

Anyone wanna buy me a few therapist sessions? Lol.

I know my guilt is permanent.  The messed up part is how easily I forgave myself and how disturbed I am with the entire scenario/scenery of life lessons evolving between my father, I, and my Son.

It is like a fractal pattern.

I almost feel scared for my son...  except I think he'll grow old and die in a better world.

But my father and maybe I may not get that pleasure.

I actually dislike shopping. It makes me think a lot more than usual.  It depresses me I guess.  I don't know.

I wanted to spend money on my mom but I think I'll change that to...  buying a new stove...  and a new toaster oven.  A good 450+ expense, plus an attempt to help my mom with the house expenses.

Dunno how home owners are expected to cope when the paychecks get smaller, taxes go up, and my stuff starts breaking down and I've barely enough money to keep my stuff from breaking down -_-

I need to leave this country

[Jade]

Mo' money, mo' problems, eh?

Need to start practicing using that Law of Attraction, man. The things you need or want don't have to be acquired by paying for them. The universe and its matter are infinite, everything you need will be there for you. Money is one of those things that's so easy to get down about, because of all of our weird societal conditionings that make us think this and that. I mean, I can't even articulate how warped our perception of money as an energy form is. Either way, spend your money on what makes you most excited in the moment to spend it on - and spend it as if there will always be more (there will).

[Jade]

Money catalyst is hard catalyst. I support my husband and myself on my part-time income that is dwindling as winter approaches. Things are thin and have been for a while now. It's been very interesting. I enjoy my job, the ethos there is definitely something I can get behind. Most restaurants don't care about waste or environmental impact, but this one does. And I worry that the next place I find won't be as good of a fit. But I also know I shouldn't think that way, that the universe will provide me with exactly what I need. But, it leaves me at an impasse, caught in limbo where I'm making just barely enough to get by but not enough to get ahead or even catch up entirely, and motivation to change the situation is low.

I think deep down I know the answer is: new job. Blargh.

Oh, and TTP, collectively I think we have subsidized many hours of therapy for you.

[The_Tired_Philosopher]

Hours?

You surely mean decades.

I doubt the Universe will drop an oven for me. I create my own future, which means buying a new stove. I don't think one will synchronistically fall into my possession.

My reality can be miraculous and magical, but the entire time intellect and logic remain and retain. I don't doubt the LoA, its just its not as easy or simple as you'd think to 'direct'.

Or maybe I'm just too isolated to even know what's proper to direct.

I have realized I just spent a week completely alone beyond customer interaction.

No idea how I'm still sane. I like sleep.

[Jade]

Hey, here's my example of how I got my tires. It was stressing me out and the two front tires both had a slow leak, so each one would need filled once a week. I put it out there I wanted the new tires, I had the thought even to ask the in-laws as a Christmas present. Last month we went to pay our rent to them (they get half our rent) and, with no warning, my father in law said to keep the money and put it towards some new tires. Now, I know I'm very lucky to have such generous and loving in-laws, but it was still totally an unexpected things as I hadn't even verbalized my desire to have them get them for us as a gift.

There are plenty of ways a new stove can fall in your lap. The more you allow reality to be flexible, the more it responds by being flexible. And, it doesn't have to be the stove, maybe a ps4 falls into your lap and you use the ps4 money to buy the stove... again, it's all about allowing reality to be flexible and setting the intention to abundance and to receive what you need.

[Minyatur]

Hours?

You surely mean decades.

I doubt the Universe will drop an oven for me.  I create my own future, which means buying a new stove.  I don't think one will synchronistically fall into my possession.

My reality can be miraculous and magical, but the entire time intellect and logic remain and retain.  I don't doubt the LoA, its just its not as easy or simple as you'd think to 'direct'.

Or maybe I'm just too isolated to even know what's proper to direct.

I have realized I just spent a week completely alone beyond customer interaction.

No idea how I'm still sane.  I like sleep.

Might be out of topic, but are you able to silence your mind?

My usual state of mind is silenced. Thoughts arise mainly if I seek to contemplate something but my being is mainly a stillness. I came to notice with time that others seem to be bombarded by thoughts which they hook up on and which brings them to create a given reality. 

I'm saying this because as you said you do not doubt the LoA, but in a way I seem to think you underestimate the power of your own thoughts. This is something I notice in a close friend of mine which you make me think of in different ways, he seems very blind to the fact that he creates his own reality. Also if unlike me you energize/polarize your thoughts, they then become much more powerful. So the LoA isn't just to try to create a reality you want, it's also becoming aware of the reality you've been creating for yourself so far.

[Adonai One]

Seeking ourselves through methods one may deduce as Law of Attraction oriented, my wife and I have a commitment to work as little as possible for as much as possible. We dump all the work that has no hope of improving our life's situation. As for myself, I dump anything that does not have a sign of growth within a month.

We have plenty of time for our couple and friends. We are socially fulfilled. Our method however produces JUST enough money to get by.

Get your kids one gift: TIME OFF SO YOU CAN SPEND MUCH TIME WITH THEM.

[Adonai One]

I'll say this lastly: A person that forces you to live life by a schedule and a forcibly rationed and limited income is not your friend nor true family. Put them at the the bottom of your list AND SUPPORT THOSE CAPABLE OF UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.