01-05-2010, 03:12 PM
Good insights. I feel the same, at some point I acquired the feeling that death was the finalization where people become one with all from which they will come back in many shapes or forms. But related to self, loss is simply the temporal other side of some event. The fact that something ends doesn't change anything about what was during the time it occurred. So if this event is the experience of a loved one. They remain loved, they remain a part of us, they remain part of our lives. It's just their physical presence that has moved on in one way or another. Part of being able to build good attachment to people is not being afraid of having to let go. It's not pleasant, but as something that is part of life there are worse things that could have happened. In the case of abusive relationships the other staying around is one example.
In the process of awakening and well just life I had to say goodbye to a lot of friends, fortunately hardly any of them through death. My choice has always been to find happiness and that means moving on and remembering the good things as treasures in our lives.
I try to adopt certain quirks from people who died. I started carrying a chestnut around after my grandmother died. It was her strange thing she always carried one in her pocket. Now I do too. At least I would, the dog ate my last one. :-/
In the process of awakening and well just life I had to say goodbye to a lot of friends, fortunately hardly any of them through death. My choice has always been to find happiness and that means moving on and remembering the good things as treasures in our lives.
I try to adopt certain quirks from people who died. I started carrying a chestnut around after my grandmother died. It was her strange thing she always carried one in her pocket. Now I do too. At least I would, the dog ate my last one. :-/