Advice on feelings of annoyance

[Monica]

I felt those intense feelings of frustration building up. I took Aaron's advice, thought to myself why I wasn't loving this person unconditionally, examined this part of me, accepted the feelings, and then was even able to accept my mother's comments.

Wonderful! Sounds like you had a breakthru!

There has already been a lot of great advice given.

I can relate to your challenge, though for me it's not so much less intelligent people that I get frustrated with, but those who are narrow-minded. I know that people don't have much control over how intelligent they are, so I tend to view 'stupid' comments the way I might view the comments of a child. You'd expect a child to act like, well, like a child, right? Spiritually and intellectually, we're in a 1-room schoolhouse, essentially.

But narrow-mindedness, ah, that one I struggle with, because it seems so intentional. I have a difficult time loving unconditionally when someone closes their mind to something they know nothing about, or totally twists something, or refuses to even consider another point of view. And yet even that must be accepted, loved, and forgiven! What helps me is to remember that there is probably fear lurking at the root of their blockage of new ideas.

The obvious isms like racism and sexism are easy to spot; less so the other isms like looksism, speciesism, intellectualism, and, what do you call the one I struggle with? The one regarding closed-mindedness? I don't know the word for that! They're all the same in that they offer an opportunity for separation because the person is different from us, and maybe doesn't live up to our expectations or ideals. They're all the same in that they offer an opportunity for us to accept, forgive, and love.

In the case of intellectualism, (which is one I've experienced on both the giving end and the receiving end), we have Ra as our role model. Don frequently expressed embarrassment and self-consciousness for not understanding Ra's explanations, and for asking 'stupid' questions. And yet, Ra was entirely patient, loving and forgiving. We are younger siblings so we're expected to not understand as fully as Ra would. Likewise, many of our other-selves might be younger siblings, in certain respects (though not in others).

Your mother might have a lesser intellectual capacity than you because she might be a younger soul. Or, she might be an older soul who chose a limited intellectual capacity this time around, in order to focus on certain lessons. She might actually be your elder on issues like compassion, kindness, or whatever. Notice how Ra always said 'teach/learn' never just teach by itself. You are never just the teacher. You are always the student as well.

It might help to ask yourself: What can you learn from your mom? In what way is she your elder? This can be humbling. Look for her strengths and gifts. A strong intellect isn't one of them, but surely there are other areas in which she is blessed or gifted, and can teach you. It might help to turn the tables on this dynamic. Who knows, she might even be frustrated with you regarding other personality quirks!

As was just mentioned in a previous post, the key is to choose to find the love in the present moment. Making the choice to seek out her strengths might help to do that.

Another technique that has helped me a lot was one given by Q'uo, and I have been trying to find that session for awhile, so if anyone knows which one I'm referring to, please tell me! It had to do with feeling the negative emotion, focusing on it, then pulling it up to the heart where it could be transformed into love. Something was said about the heart being an actual device for doing just that. It's a very powerful technique.

You seem to be already consciously doing that...just keep doing that and you will transform this!