The Dream Thread

[Meerie]

I fall back asleep. Then I dream I'm walking by a tennis court and as I'm walking, the players ask me if I can pickup and throw back a ball that's beside me and outside the court. As I go to pick it up, I see another ball roll in front of me. I'm looking down so I look up. I see the players grinning and they start to lob more balls over to me and tell me to go fetch and return it to them. They are obviously playing with me. Toying with me. I got angry. I felt insulted. Humiliated. I wanted to throw the balls as far away from them as possible. I then wake up.

These two dreams mirror my life. I've always had a good bit of compassion. But I have a big ego. I feel insulted and humiliated often when disrespected and tend to lash out.

I can relate to that VERY WELL, my friend. As you say it is easy to have an open heart with people who are nice and friendly.
And it is probably a very natural survival-based reaction to lash out to people who are disrespectful, and thus threatening our ego.
I guess there are no easy answers to this, but remember - the person who decides to be disrespectful and annoying does so out of their own free will. We are not responsible for what they do, we are responsible for our OWN reaction to them. In a way they are providing us great service, because they are testing us- someone once told me "you don't learn as much from your friends, as you do from your enemies"

I came across this bit yesterday, maybe you will like it:

"2. Give up your need for control. Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you – situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangers you meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.


“By letting it go it all gets done. The world is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world is beyond winning.” Lao Tzu

3. Give up on blame. Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

6. Give up complaining. Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking."

here is the full list :
http://www.wakingtimes.com/2012/03/30/15...-be-happy/