My Awakening. Or Grand Delusion. You Choose.

[Tenet Nosce]

Really has someone on b4th suggested something negative about being a wanderer?

To my awareness, not overtly. I am referring to subjective cues, the nature of which, being subjective, does allow the possibility for my perception to be entirely a fabrication of my own mind.

Allow me to recapitulate my experiences here on Bring4th.

I had known about this forum for quite some time, but had never really felt drawn to it for whatever reason.

Although I am not recalling the specific reason (pesky veil) why- I had been contemplating harvest and trying to formulate where exactly in my mind the problems with fully accepting it as real.

My first post here was in May 2010, approximately 15 years after completion of my initial reading of the Law of One:

Thread: Post-harvest continuity of consciousness
Post: Post-harvest continuity of consciousness
I'm new to this forum but not new to Law of One. After many years of research, I find myself coming back to the same fundamental question: How does it actually work? I will briefly summarize what...
Tenet Nosce The Harvest 52 2,792 05-28-2010, 12:34 P

Upon some discussion and further contemplation of harvest I identified a second big blind spot in terms of my understanding as regarded the actual dynamics of harvest with respect to population. And so I started a second thread to specifically discuss this issue:

Thread: Harvest: Do The Math
Post: Harvest: Do The Math
Facts From CIA Handbook: Current world population: About 7 billion Current death rate: About 60 million per year Hypothesis: By the end of 2012, all people who will not graduate to 4D will no longe...
Tenet Nosce The Harvest 286 8,211 06-02-2010, 05:39 PM

After about another week or so of discussion, I was still not completely content with any of the ideas offered. Also, I noticed that only a few people happened to be interested in discussing these at the time. This somewhat surprises me- and so here I can identify where I felt a little disappointed as a result of having a false expectation as to how others perceived my views.

If you scroll through the beginnings of those threads, you will see certain dynamics begin to unfold which perhaps may shed some light on the origins of my perceptions of others with respect to this forum.

Some days later, I had been pondering much on how the Ra contact actually got initiated. As I also have been reading "Matthew's Messages" there had been a recent one from Hatonn which caused me to wonder about Hatonn's contact with L/L, and if indeed it was the same Hatonn. This led me to wonder what went on in the last sessions with Hatonn before Ra appeared, and realized I had never really looked at the last sessions with Hatonn before Ra came in. I started a third thread documenting my thoughts:

Thread: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before Ra
Post: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before...
This is interesting. I have never before looked back at the last few sessions leading up to the initial Ra contact. Here Hatonn announces that they have plans to use radio, and maybe television, to ...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 43 3,454 06-02-2010, 06:44 PM

Then I conceived of an idea: I wondered what would happen if I "removed myself" from the thread for a period of one year in order to see how they develop on their own with no input from me. And so I did exactly that.

In anticipation of my return in June 2011, my mind was naturally again on the material, however I wasn't even fully conscious of this. For "some reason" I felt drawn back to Bring4th. Only after I had been back did I remember about the idea to purposely leave. So there is a great example of how the veil works, I might add.

Here you see I have come back to "harvest" the fruits of my threads:

Thread: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before Ra
Post: RE: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Be...
First off... I hadn't realized there was new activity on this thread. So my apologies for dropping my own thread. So here's an interesting development, from the latest "Matthew's Message". Quote:7....

Notice at this point, I had not yet gone back to my first two threads. Only this third one.

Instead, I started looking around at other threads that looked interesting and drew my attention.

The first was unity100's thread in the Advanced Studies section. Although as you see my first reply is not to unity100, but to abridgetoofar. I think this is significant and you can see how some confusion unfolded:

Thread: Guardians from the Octave above
Post: RE: Guardians from the Octave above
(06-17-2011 03:22 PM)abridgetoofar Wrote: Per request, Ra's quote on the Guardians' role in Harvest: Quote:The third group watching over this process is that group you call the Guardians. This...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 151 2,078 06-21-2011, 04:49 PM


The second was 3DMonkey's post about Patton. Again, you can see that my first reply was to Bring4th_Aaron not 3DMonkey.:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
(06-26-2011 09:26 PM)Bring4th_Aaron Wrote: Couldn't a being be incredibly positively polarized, but not harvestable if they "sat on" their potential, not doing anything with the increased abili...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 06-28-2011, 11:44 AM


Then the "Big Blowout" occurred. Honestly this was a complete surprise to me. I thought I was simply offering a view which I thought was reasonable. Nothing at all to spark such controversy. Now if you go back and view the carnage, you will see what I am talking about. See what happened?

Where did all this negativity come from? Me? Honestly I don't think so, but maybe I am still in denial.

This caused me to deeply seek for greater truth, in order to more completely express my views. In my mind, this was not only being of service to myself, but also to others. Which is how I tend to think all the time. How can I serve the highest good of all, including myself.

Almost exactly 24 hours later, I received the inspiration:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
***NOTE*** My use of the word "you" in this post is not referring to anybody in particular, so please don't take it personally. 3DMonkey Wrote:We are getting closer to the issue here. This sounds l...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 06-29-2011, 11:56 AM

This drew direct praise from both Bring4th_Monica and 111. Two things to point out here.

First- this is what caused me to click on their profiles and notice that I could go back and easily look at their posts. This eventually led me to the idea of looking at their very first post, which will become important later on.

Second- if you follow the thread from there, perhaps you will see where I got the notion that other members were reacting negatively to the public praise I had received from Bring4th_Monica and 111.

So hopefully you can see here how this directly triggered the above personal issue I have been referring to.

I was trying to help. I was trying to do a good thing. I got some inspiration. Shared it with others.

And STILL there was a negative reaction because I got praised for what I did. I was not looking for the praise. Thank you very much, but I do not require strangers on a web forum looking out to make sure my "ego" doesn't get too inflated. Do you see?

Again, maybe I am projecting all of this. But I don't think so, and I will get into why shortly.

Getting back to the praise... this is when I looked to see what Bring4th_Monica was up to in the forum, and this is what drew me to the vegetarian thread.

Now, it "just so happened" that I had been working on a HUGE personal research project at this time with regard to the origins of religions beliefs, and finding the correct historical context for all of these things. This included, of course, trying to figure out how the Ra contacts fit into all of this.

For this reason, I had just done deep research into these personages: Zoroaster, Mahavira, Siddharta Gautama, Laozi, Confucious, and Pythagoras. Among other things, I was comparing their beliefs about meat eating and vegetarianism, trying to figure out the origins. Keeping this context in mind, here is where I came into the vegetarian thread:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Vegetarianism, as a philosophical construct, is based on the doctrine of ahimsa, or nonviolence toward living things. This concept was originally born in India circa the first millennium BC, and was ...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,070 07-07-2011, 01:26 AM

Yet again, you can see that I was not replying to Bring4th_Monica. I was actually replying to yossarian WAY back in the beginning of the thread. However, if you look back at the thread you can see how Bring4th_Monica could have easily taken it that way. Although I quickly caught what happened, the confusion had already happened and a maelstrom ensued.

It takes approximately 3 days to apparently resolve this second blowout, and here you see my peace offering:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
I will interpret your 4:20 post as a peace offering. RE: zealotry. I mean that in the sense of taking an absolutist stance on a philosophical principle by declaring something to be inherentl...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,073 07-10-2011, 04:47 PM

The next day I go back to More Positive But Less Harvestable and you will see an interesting exchange between unity100 and I. In the background, things between he and I began to get heated regarding whether or not every word in the material was literally true:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
(06-29-2011 11:23 AM)unity100 Wrote: i think it was 5d wars that were being fought with light and thought. Ah. So I am a 5D warrior then!
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 07-10-2011, 10:41 PM

Interested to know more about unity100's views, I clicked on his profile and found another interesting thread. Here is my entry into that thread. And actually you can see how it directly ties back to this same issue of wanderers. However, yet again, notice that my reply is not to unity100, but to βαθμιαίος:

Thread: Guardians of the quarantine doesnt seem infallible
Post: RE: Guardians of the quarantine doesnt seem infall...
(07-11-2011 03:40 PM)βαθμιαίος Wrote: The question we've been dancing around is why would Ra say that wanderers are here, in part, to polarize? My understanding is that polarization equates to ...
Tenet Nosce Advanced Studies 189 1,491 07-11-2011, 07:10 PM

This exchange causes me to go back and look at Session One. This is where I notice the [tape gets flipped] part, and where for the first time I made the observation that Ra offered to speak more on the Law of One, but Don said no, tell us about the earth changes.

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Here it is right here in Session One. I went back to look and it was staring me right in the face. Quoteoes this form a sufficient amount of information, or could we speak further? Is there anothe...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,770 07-11-2011, 11:36 PM

Again, I share my eureka moment. Again, I get some very positive feedback. And again some folks appear to have a negative reaction to my realization, and arguing against what I was trying to say, or completely ignoring it.

Again- I did not understand why there was so much resistance to my post. And again- I still do not see how all the negativity was sourced within myself. And again- I am willing to accept the possibility that I completely projected this onto others. And again- I do not think this is actually the case.

Next up is when unity100 replies to some of the ideas I had been tossing out, and appearing to get increasingly irritated because he felt I was making grand conclusions based on false premises. To me, I was just "putting stuff out there" in order to better learn where my understanding was incomplete. I wasn't forwarding this as a "grand theory of everything". And unity100 did point out some very important things I was overlooking.

However, we still appear to be at an impasse over Ra getting the dates wrong in the material. And this impasse eventually became the seed for later maelstrom.

Meanwhile, I became equally curious as to what happened in the first session after the last Ra contact. I document my thoughts here:

Thread: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
Post: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
I would like to now discuss this session, presumably the first one after Don's suicide. There are two distinct parts to the session. In the first Carla is channeling Hatonn: Hatonn Wrote:I greet you...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 13 1,107 07-12-2011, 02:46 AM

Yet again, I receive some public praise. This time from 3DMonkey. And yet again, you can see how this was followed by negatively oriented posts from others.

Although I will point out that I apparently made an error in my understanding that Don had just committed suicide before this session. It was later pointed out that this was not the case. I have yet to fully reevaluate my thoughts in this thread, as continuing drama in other threads continues to unfold.

You can see where again I decided to hit the "pause" button and remove myself from the thread:

Thread: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
Post: RE: 1984.04.15 First Hatonn Contact After Ra
(07-12-2011 11:43 AM)unity100 Wrote: No, my friend no. Indeed. OK so here is what I am going to do. I am going to refrain from commenting on this thread for a minimum of ten (10) days. I would...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 13 1,107 07-12-2011, 01:47 PM

I go back to More Positive but Less Harvestable and continue discussion. Also right about this time I was going through some sort of quickening. Synchronicities were flying all about. Not the least of which were time ones. I documented this observation here:

Thread: Numbers! Numbers! Time! Time!
Post: Numbers! Numbers! Time! Time!
What is up with this stuff, anyway? 07-10-2011, 11:07 PM (This post was last modified: 07-11-2011 11:11 PM by Tenet Nosce.) Post: #65 07-11-2011, 01:23 AM (This post was last modified: ...
Tenet Nosce Olio 21 442 07-13-2011, 05:39 PM

Meanwhile, we happen to also be in the midst of a "juice revolution" and so I thought in consideration of the blowout over meat eating, maybe I would put myself in a juicer's shoes for a few days:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Just got a juicer! YUM!
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-13-2011, 08:10 PM

We continue to have some discussion in More Positive But Less Harvestable, but somehow the streams get crossed after I made a comment about vegan zealots, and yet ANOTHER explosion happens between me and Bring4th_Monica.

At this point I am like, WTF? Why do these blowouts keep happening over and over again? Am I causing them? Is it me? What is going on here?

This when I got the idea to actually make a mental list of all the forum members who were involved in the "Big Blowout" and go back and see what was their very first post on Bring4th.

The idea being... maybe if I could (A) "Go back in time" and make peace with all of these people by responding kindly to their original posts, and (B) understand more deeply the reason each of these people were brought to the forum, then © maybe I could help this from continuing to occur, and (D) learn something about myself in the process.

This goes on for a period of three days, as I continue to post in other threads, but leave More Positive But Less Harvestable alone. Finally, I reemerge in the thread, and make a post concurring with 3DMonkey:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
(07-12-2011 01:06 AM)Tenet Nosce Wrote: (07-12-2011 12:19 AM)3DMonkey Wrote: No, we get it Ra. ....Moving on to more important things.... 'retrospective oops' Bingo! Through no fault o...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,771 07-18-2011, 05:25 PM

Another two days pass, and seejay21 rejoins the thread:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Hi, seejay21. Thanks for rejoining the thread! (07-20-2011 04:49 AM)seejay21 Wrote: My interjection into this thread is to discourage from seeking answers about specific people, and thier ori...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,771 07-20-2011, 02:15 PM

Now thinking that the "knot has been untied" in the thread, I free myself to poke about in other threads. I also continue my studies into the Ra material, and specifically begin to start wondering about why, exactly, there are certain sticking points, and the possibility that Ra actually made some mistakes in the material

I had previously made some comments in different threads about my observations in Session One, specifically with respect to how the query limits the reply, but there wasn't much of a response. This is when I come into the lenticular thread:

Thread: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular galaxy when our galaxy is spiral?
Post: RE: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular gala...
WHAT?! Could this possibly mean that Ra is not infallible? Or perhaps that limitations in the Questioner's mind could distort the communication toward greater confusion? Wild!
Tenet Nosce Science & Technology 38 1,061 07-21-2011, 09:16 AM

unity100 gets irritated with my post and makes an attempt to "call me out" on my supposed "hidden agenda". I am thinking to myself... WOW after all that hard work and positive intention I am yet again being accused of having negative intentions, when I, in fact, do not.

More days pass, and David Wilcock posts on his website about uncovered documents relating channelings of Hatonn during the fifties in SE Michigan. I also learn that there is some connection to L/L Research. This is -very interesting- to me because I have always felt personally connected to the material.

I grew up in SE Michigan, and I keep getting this intuition that my grandfather, Leonard, may have been involved with this group back in the 50's. Interestingly, he died of a sudden stroke in 1984, shortly after the Ra contact ended. I still don't know if there is anything to this. But it seems to confirm what I have been sensing this whole time:


Thread: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Before Ra
Post: RE: 1981.01.05 - 1981.01.15 Last Hatonn Contact Be...
Some new information just released by David Wilcock. This document contains several transmissions from Hatonn, and a few from Latwii, to a group operating in the SE Michigan area during the 50's and e...
Tenet Nosce Sessions in Focus 43 3,454 07-23-2011, 11:44 AM


I also continue to investigate more deeply into Don's suicide. This is specifically interesting to me because of previous experiences with negative entities, one of which influenced a friend to believe that I was spearheading a conspiracy among our friends to have him committed to a mental institution. This has always struck me as oddly similar. Anyway, I continue to delve a bit in the tribute to Don Elkin's thread... but find that I must tread lightly and that some of my views are yet again appearing to irritate others:

Thread: An appreciation of 'Outlier' Don Elkins
Post: RE: An appreciation of 'Outlier' Don Elkins
(07-16-2011 05:39 PM)kycahi Wrote: Back in my college days, I often attended weekly meditation meetings at friends, Hal and Jo. Hal was the one who first introduced Don to that particular kind ...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 42 2,087 07-23-2011, 11:53 AM

This is also when I do a google search for "Don Elkins suicide" and find some interesting information relating to David Wilcock, and Laura Knight-Jadczyk. As you can see... Google puts these two individual's websites at the top of the list.

Reading Laura's views on "Ra and wanderers" as well as Don's suicide- I begin to realize that some (not all) of the ideas closely mimicked things I had been tossing around in my own mind. It just seemed too bizarre to be "coincidence". I began to read the C's channelings and Laura's "The Wave" series:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Now here is another bizarre "coincidence"! I don't really follow the Cassiopean channeled messages to any considerable degree. However, seeing as how I had just quoted them in another thread I thoug...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-24-2011, 01:19 AM

This all acts as catalyst for me to more deeply consider the role of wanderers in earth's history. Including my own. I might add at this nexus that simultaneous to all of this going on, I seem to have uncovered evidence of a past life.

Whether or not it was "me" a major theme of this person's life was: writing books in order to help uplift humanity, later trying to redact some of his words due to some new awareness he had come upon, but having others twist his words into their opposite, and used as a catalyst for some very destructive things.

I will leave it at that for now. Notice how the theme ties into, not only my experience here in this forum, but the Ra material itself, and indeed Ra's experiences on earth with the unintended consequences of actions taken in thought of service to others.

Thread: 6th-Density Negatively Polarized Wanderers?
Post: RE: 6th-Density Negatively Polarized Wanderers?
It seems to me that whenever a 6D Wanderer gets involved in earthly affairs in a public way, their efforts eventually become turned to the exact opposite of their intention. Especially so when it come...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 78 1,833 07-24-2011, 11:31 AM

Meanwhile, things get whipped up yet again in More Positive But Less Harvestable, and I find myself having to defend myself to others:

Thread: More Positive but Less Harvestable
Post: RE: More Positive but Less Harvestable
When I come across seemingly conflicting information, my natural instinct is that investigation into the discrepancy will yield a higher level of understanding. While this may not be fruitful in all c...
Tenet Nosce Strictly Law of One 189 4,773 07-26-2011, 03:06 PM


And also, things get whipped up yet again in the meat thread:

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: In regards to eating meat
Alrighty, then. Despite the other valid points raised in this thread, I do not see one iota of evidence from the Ra material to support a vegetarian lifestyle. In fact, I see quite the opposite: Quote...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-26-2011, 07:22 PM

By now about a week has past, and I get back to responding to unity100's attempt to call me out, thinking that I have found a more balanced perspective. Yet my attempt at peacemaking yet again seems to fall somewhat flat.

Thread: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular galaxy when our galaxy is spiral?
Post: RE: Why do Don and Ra talk about a lenticular gala...
(07-22-2011 03:48 PM)unity100 Wrote: lets get to the bottom of this - you have a beef with some information in the material, and you need Ra to be fallible in order for that information not to ...
Tenet Nosce Science & Technology 38 1,061 07-27-2011, 11:36 PM

Next I respond to @ndy's post about allergies and raw food, and yet again confusion ensues with Bring4th_Monica. I am like... really? I thought we already settled this... twice.

What the hell is going on here? Why can't I get a post off in this forum without somebody getting all bent out of shape? Do you see?

This is when I began to suspect manipulation behind the scenes by negative entities. It was the only explanation that gave everybody, including myself, the benefit of the doubt.

Now... Happy Birthday to me! It is noontime on my 34th birthday and what am I thinking about? Gee... I really need some more wisdom in order to help clear these negative entities out of my life. They seem to be wreaking havoc!


Thread: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
Post: RE: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
(07-04-2011 05:39 AM)Nyu Wrote: I can't just quit my job though, I have a family to support. Sure you can! Nyu, you are a being of limitless potential. Perhaps it would not be ideal to simpl...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 79 1,422 07-29-2011, 12:09 AM

Meanwhile, I realized I still had to resolve the issue in the raw food and allergies thread with Bring4th_Monica. So I decided I would "speak my peace" and be done with it... so I could carry on and enjoy my day.

Thread: In regards to eating meat
Post: RE: Raw food and oral allergy syndrome
(07-29-2011 11:21 AM)Bring4th_Monica Wrote: Exactly what I was thinking. Sounds like there's some prejudice entering the conversation. There was no need to bring up fanaticism or what some peop...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 823 31,076 07-29-2011, 01:12 PM

Immediately after this post I experienced- what I perceived to be- a negative attack, as I documented the next day here:

Thread: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
Post: RE: How to Remove Negative Entities From Our Lives
Yesterday, shortly after my post on the Raw food and oral allergy syndrome which has since been moved to In regards to eating meat (post at 1:12 pm) I experienced what could have been a 5D attack. I a...
Tenet Nosce Life on Planet Earth 79 1,422 07-30-2011, 03:54 PM


I'm sorry this took forever... but you did ask for it!

At this point let me be completely clear: I know that I played a part in all of this drama ensuing. I know I was not completely innocent. I know I can be an ass at times, and throw out some inflammatory comments. And I am sorry, and seek forgiveness.

What I did realize is that one way I was contributing to the confusion was by not clearly delineating where I was directly responding to somebody in particular, and when I was responding to a post in general.

Since this realization, I have taken great pains to me more clear about this. And indeed, this reply is not only to you, but should be taken as part of my "awakening story"... to be continued.

My "awakening" is now.

But, to now answer your question directly. No. It is not "all about me". And the above post explains why.

I am not trying to "blame" anyone... merely hold up the mirror of myself for others to see.

Oh and I just realized something else I should point out. Often times my posts are a "real-time" documentation of an idea or thought as I receive it. Not a recapitulation of a theory I had previously concocted.

Secondly, I go back and edit my posts after I get the general gist down. This typically takes about one hour time- so I would recommend not replying to my posts until after one hour.

Keep that in mind.