Apologies for the row of posts - I feel it is better to split up the content, but I can mesh my posts together if that would be preferred.
Edit: Written piecemeal and posted after your most recent post, Quincunx, thus no longer part of a row, but not yet acknowledging your newest words. Forgive me the delay, please!
Edit #2: Quincunx, I respect and appreciate your decision to limit what you say in regards to my situation. I am quite intrigued at what you have supposed - in fact, I have, previously, wondered if I might be a fifth-density Wanderer. Further in this post, I had written that I now suspect I am a dual-activated person. I will have to examine myself further, as you have counseled. Thank you.
By dream dictionary, do you mean one attained literally through dreams and dream journaling? I began a new dream journal only a few days ago! How synchronistic this might turn out to be!
Would you share your insights on the Song of Solomon thus far? I look forward to your thesis!
--------
As for the Confederation's insights, I remembered reading this earlier:
Indeed, my adrenal 'setting' was detected in prenatal screening. Thus, it was not programming I acquired during this incarnation, rather, it was preincarnative. That said, I have been told that my birth chart was appraised and a consensus formed in that group of scholars that I was "a spirit trying to decide if he really WANTED to stay here." This has been a source of both great anguish and inspiration for me. On the one hand, my adrenal programming could be an 'easy out' from the incarnation borne of my metaphysical cold feet - but I have been advised and accepted that this is quite unlikely. The adrenal programming could instead be a reminder or, less charitably, a consequence of my alleged hesitation. Or, maybe I, still in time/space, eagerly selected this programming, and then was struck with doubt when faced with the reality of living out the whole plan of my incarnation. I am confident only that the adrenal programming is an opportunity; for what, I can only guess at this juncture.
Carla, as Ra explicitly mentions, too, would be a great 'character study' on the topic of physical distortion programming and healing.
To delve a bit more into the May 7, 2006 transcript:
I mentioned that I feel I have outgrown my asthma. My early birth compromised my respiratory functions, but I believe that was acquired during that earliest period of my incarnation. First, it was a physical artifact only, I think, then it remained latent until it could serve as a more 'sophisticated' catalyst: When I started running cross-country as part of my middle school team, my asthma resurfaced and was severe. I remember, during a particular away-meet which had been scheduled just as a hard winter fell, the physical exertion overcame me halfway through the race, and it became nearly impossible for me to breathe unless I walked at a very slow pace. Several of the host team, having already finished the race, jogged beside me and implored me to keep trying, to run again, to finish strongly the race. I felt great shame. I had not the capable physical conditioning of my peers at that time, and I knew that the cold air amplified the strain on my lungs, but I felt it was wrong of me to have those realities about me and that I should run because my peers wanted me to run. I tried to tell them I could not breathe, but I could barely eke out a whole word.
My adaptation then was to sort of 'mime' running (in the races that followed; I walked the whole way to the finish line that wintry day and, later that evening, was hospitalized for pneumonia) so that I would no longer be implored to run when I felt incapable. Later, I transferred schools and again joined the cross country running team. I was still in poor condition. However, one of the experienced runners invested their time to accompany me during the first practice runs of the season, and he guided me in building up my endurance and power so that I became able to run without interruption one mile, then two, then three, and so on. I became a beloved member of the team and found most of my friends within, or convinced others to join. I still set no records, but I persevered and became a solid mid-performance runner. My coach gave me the honor and responsibility of (co-)captaining the team in my junior and senior years. Well, in my junior year, they called me 'lieutenant.' Anyways, I still, sometimes, doubted myself. The old catalyst resurfaced. I walked many of my competitive miles. Yet, I never lost the support of my coach, my team, and my friends. I had still grown in my physical capability. I felt healthy. I simply wasn't a record-setter. As I accepted this middle ground more and more, I found my asthma faded.
Now, in a different period of my life, I am not on any sports team. I do no competitive running. Yet, the asthma still has gone, even when I do run for exercise (or fun, or errands). The adrenal dysfunction remains. Is this because one program was preincarnative and the other acquired? Or because the lesson has not yet been integrated sufficiently? Or because the adrenal programming simply offers a lifetime mould for my spirit? Again, I have not yet penetrated to a single, confident conclusion. Yet, the two programs seem distinct to me.
The 'difficult quantity' here might be, I believe, our unique frequency of free will with which we are created at the dawn of time, if you will excuse the inaccurate turn of phrase, for we can intellectually assent to the idea that the dawn is an eternal dawn. I will not analyze their comments on the great smelting work of free will here now, except to relay that we are free will forged together with love. And:
Fortuitously, there is also a discussion of the dual-activated personage, or the active yellow and green ray bodies in one person in third-density, in this same transcript. I mentioned that I resonate with the idea of, maybe, being one of these persons.
(Austin, too, has a great thread on dual-activated persons here: <https://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthread.php?tid=2544> and there are other informative threads on this also.)
The dual-activated body may contribute to the shape of the disease and defenses, both, in the body.
Elsewhere, it is mentioned that, like the Wanderers from other spheres and other densities, the dual-activated person must recapitulate the lessons of love in their return incarnation. I have the opinion that such persons might have a 'fresh game,' so to speak, in that they start off without polarity but with a high propensity for regaining whatever it was when they last were harvested. I certainly remember being an angry, obstinate, confused child. I'm a little bit better now, and still working.
So, I have my programming because I still have a third-density life, and a third-density vehicle, and that programming will help shape my lessons of love, once again. I want to know the shape. I believe I have caught a few angles and curves on that shape. Above all, I am glad to be shaped, and I look forward to exploring more, feeling more, learning more, being more. (With you!)
Edit: Written piecemeal and posted after your most recent post, Quincunx, thus no longer part of a row, but not yet acknowledging your newest words. Forgive me the delay, please!
Edit #2: Quincunx, I respect and appreciate your decision to limit what you say in regards to my situation. I am quite intrigued at what you have supposed - in fact, I have, previously, wondered if I might be a fifth-density Wanderer. Further in this post, I had written that I now suspect I am a dual-activated person. I will have to examine myself further, as you have counseled. Thank you.
By dream dictionary, do you mean one attained literally through dreams and dream journaling? I began a new dream journal only a few days ago! How synchronistic this might turn out to be!
Would you share your insights on the Song of Solomon thus far? I look forward to your thesis!
--------
As for the Confederation's insights, I remembered reading this earlier:
Quote:May 7, 2006
... "your basic health is like a default setting. If you were born with radiant health, then that is your factory setting—that is how you came from the manufacturer. Your light body, your energy body, or your chakra system copies that group of settings before birth as part of the integration process of soul or spirit and physical vehicle or body. The memory of that default setting, which is health, radiant and unblemished, is retained by every cell in your body and by every iota of energy in your energy body."
Indeed, my adrenal 'setting' was detected in prenatal screening. Thus, it was not programming I acquired during this incarnation, rather, it was preincarnative. That said, I have been told that my birth chart was appraised and a consensus formed in that group of scholars that I was "a spirit trying to decide if he really WANTED to stay here." This has been a source of both great anguish and inspiration for me. On the one hand, my adrenal programming could be an 'easy out' from the incarnation borne of my metaphysical cold feet - but I have been advised and accepted that this is quite unlikely. The adrenal programming could instead be a reminder or, less charitably, a consequence of my alleged hesitation. Or, maybe I, still in time/space, eagerly selected this programming, and then was struck with doubt when faced with the reality of living out the whole plan of my incarnation. I am confident only that the adrenal programming is an opportunity; for what, I can only guess at this juncture.
Carla, as Ra explicitly mentions, too, would be a great 'character study' on the topic of physical distortion programming and healing.
To delve a bit more into the May 7, 2006 transcript:
Quote:Q'uo
[...] the sufferings and the woes of the physical existence are created as part of the work which lies before the consciousness you carry. That consciousness will use every bit of the suffering that you are able to penetrate [with] your faith.
I mentioned that I feel I have outgrown my asthma. My early birth compromised my respiratory functions, but I believe that was acquired during that earliest period of my incarnation. First, it was a physical artifact only, I think, then it remained latent until it could serve as a more 'sophisticated' catalyst: When I started running cross-country as part of my middle school team, my asthma resurfaced and was severe. I remember, during a particular away-meet which had been scheduled just as a hard winter fell, the physical exertion overcame me halfway through the race, and it became nearly impossible for me to breathe unless I walked at a very slow pace. Several of the host team, having already finished the race, jogged beside me and implored me to keep trying, to run again, to finish strongly the race. I felt great shame. I had not the capable physical conditioning of my peers at that time, and I knew that the cold air amplified the strain on my lungs, but I felt it was wrong of me to have those realities about me and that I should run because my peers wanted me to run. I tried to tell them I could not breathe, but I could barely eke out a whole word.
My adaptation then was to sort of 'mime' running (in the races that followed; I walked the whole way to the finish line that wintry day and, later that evening, was hospitalized for pneumonia) so that I would no longer be implored to run when I felt incapable. Later, I transferred schools and again joined the cross country running team. I was still in poor condition. However, one of the experienced runners invested their time to accompany me during the first practice runs of the season, and he guided me in building up my endurance and power so that I became able to run without interruption one mile, then two, then three, and so on. I became a beloved member of the team and found most of my friends within, or convinced others to join. I still set no records, but I persevered and became a solid mid-performance runner. My coach gave me the honor and responsibility of (co-)captaining the team in my junior and senior years. Well, in my junior year, they called me 'lieutenant.' Anyways, I still, sometimes, doubted myself. The old catalyst resurfaced. I walked many of my competitive miles. Yet, I never lost the support of my coach, my team, and my friends. I had still grown in my physical capability. I felt healthy. I simply wasn't a record-setter. As I accepted this middle ground more and more, I found my asthma faded.
Now, in a different period of my life, I am not on any sports team. I do no competitive running. Yet, the asthma still has gone, even when I do run for exercise (or fun, or errands). The adrenal dysfunction remains. Is this because one program was preincarnative and the other acquired? Or because the lesson has not yet been integrated sufficiently? Or because the adrenal programming simply offers a lifetime mould for my spirit? Again, I have not yet penetrated to a single, confident conclusion. Yet, the two programs seem distinct to me.
Quote:Q'uo
In a way, you may see yourselves as pilgrims who carry their packs not over their shoulders wrapped in a kerchief, as the mythical hobo figure does; rather, you may certainly see yourself as that pilgrim on the road, the journey of spiritual evolution. The pack that you carry lies within. What is metaphysical food? What does your pack hold? The answers that you offer to that may well indicate the true nature of your wellness.
[...] you may discover that many seemingly physically healthy people are not well. You may also discover that many seemingly frail people are extremely healthy. The actual state of wellness within your organism is a function not only of the state of your physical body and not only the state of your mind, it also contains an element that is difficult to quantize.
The 'difficult quantity' here might be, I believe, our unique frequency of free will with which we are created at the dawn of time, if you will excuse the inaccurate turn of phrase, for we can intellectually assent to the idea that the dawn is an eternal dawn. I will not analyze their comments on the great smelting work of free will here now, except to relay that we are free will forged together with love. And:
Quote:If you see the perfect body and wellness itself as a state of love, then you will see that fear is a choice which turns one away from the face of love. Therefore, the choice for healing is a choice to lose fear and choose love.
Fortuitously, there is also a discussion of the dual-activated personage, or the active yellow and green ray bodies in one person in third-density, in this same transcript. I mentioned that I resonate with the idea of, maybe, being one of these persons.
(Austin, too, has a great thread on dual-activated persons here: <https://www.bring4th.org/forums/showthread.php?tid=2544> and there are other informative threads on this also.)
The dual-activated body may contribute to the shape of the disease and defenses, both, in the body.
Quote:Q'uo
The fourth-density-activated entities or dual-activated beings are tougher at looking straight in the mirror of the self, seeing the weeds, and deciding on a form of weed control.
It is up to you to decide how you want to deal with this judgment of self. We especially want to indicate that in our opinion it is not well to judge the self in the way of this instrument’s experience of the Old Testament. We do not want you to condemn yourself. We want you to see that when a plant is not wheat, that plant is a weed.
Elsewhere, it is mentioned that, like the Wanderers from other spheres and other densities, the dual-activated person must recapitulate the lessons of love in their return incarnation. I have the opinion that such persons might have a 'fresh game,' so to speak, in that they start off without polarity but with a high propensity for regaining whatever it was when they last were harvested. I certainly remember being an angry, obstinate, confused child. I'm a little bit better now, and still working.
Quote:In terms of what body will be activated when: they are both activated now, but you are in a third-density physical vehicle. You are living on a third-density planet. You are here for a reason.
So, I have my programming because I still have a third-density life, and a third-density vehicle, and that programming will help shape my lessons of love, once again. I want to know the shape. I believe I have caught a few angles and curves on that shape. Above all, I am glad to be shaped, and I look forward to exploring more, feeling more, learning more, being more. (With you!)