The creative process has become painful -seeking advice

[tadeus]

I feel extremely upset during and after playing. I mean..... this is something I find magical in a lot of ways, writing a song, and yet I can't help but feel so much pain during the process. I think this is perhaps where the suicidal thoughts come in, if I can't play music without feeling this way, then what's the point? Why continue living if I can't even feel joy within the creative process? That's the conclusion I come to at least.

If anyone needs more clarity in what I'm experiencing, I am happy to provide. I feel sort of muddy about the whole thing


thanks all

My talents does not express in music, but i feel the same pain in creative processes.

From my point of view the creativity is blocked by the things that are going on outside on this planet.
There is so much fear and pain outside that reach us within the group consciousness.
We can't ignore it when we have a certain  sensibility.

There are times when there are only horrible visions for the future left and fear comes up.
Then suicidal thoughts can come in or can take possess of us.
We must go into the Now und overcome it.