How to properly cut cords with somebody?

[Aion]

The only way to truly 'break' a connection is to uproot that which it is rooted to.

And that is accomplished how?

Well the fact is you have to come to terms with the raw feelings of the situation and determine where your attachment is. Every attachment is sustained by an emotional connection. Although lauded as a goal of 'enlightenment' the fact is you don't have to completely clear all attachment, just identify and change those which trap you in illusory thinking.

More importantly, the focus must be turned upon oneself and away from the other. What is rooted in you is not derived from any other person but is an extension only of your own natures. Of course, that isn't to say people can't be held responsible for their actions, but I always ask, where is the end? The end is when you stop preoccupying yourself with that other and turn to your own self. Focusing on yourself is not the same as being self-centered, although it may appear that way, and is socially deplored. Focusing on yourself is cleansing yourself of all that is not yourself. It is hard, we are influenced by so many people and so many cultures, but ultimately we have to create our own minds. We have to create our own internal landscape that we want to live within.

So it all comes down to, what do you really want? I think that when we say we don't know, it's really that we think what we want is wrong in some way. Other times, we seem like we have a clear idea for comfort, but aren't always in tune with our hearts. We have to be honest with ourselves, first and foremost.

Often there is some part of ourselves that another person energizes and it can be difficult learning to energize that part for ourselves. The tricky bit is really figuring out what part of ourselves is attached.