A story I didn't want to share.

[Aion]

Sorry to hear he's still not doing better, hopefully with time he will open up to your help.

Like I said I've been here awhile and I've seen a lot of different things going on. However, there are some things about the forum and L/L Research that I have observed. One is that the people who are physically involved with L/L and the members of the forum are fairly separate entities. Even most of the people who go to the yearly gatherings are not people who are on the forum. (Maybe cause others have picked up on the funky vibe...) In general I think that not a lot of attention is paid to moderation in terms of behaviour.

This is because, two, I have noticed that since the claim in the Ra Material that acceptance is the pathway to positivity has driven many to insist on absolute acceptance of all things, even atrocity. I think that part of the driver for this is the existence of the Hidden Hand material. I am not sure if you are familiar but if not then you should probably read it. I think it will give you an idea of what sort of energy is lingering around this place. It attempts to make acceptable all the evils of the world.

https://www.wanttoknow.info/secret_socie...and_081018

I agree with you that there is a lot of confusion here and that darkness and light have been conflated with eachother. As far I am aware there is no one who has caused anyone else to actually commit suicide on the forum and the only previous member I am aware of to off themselves already had the tendency and it had nothing to do with the forum but there is no doubt that C_A is not the first individual to be troubled by the 'total acceptance is the way' narrative.

There's this idea that goes around that 'balance' or being 'positive' means accepting every horror that is before you. I don't agree with that. I think that the forum is stuck in the 'sinkhole of indifference' as some might put it. It's not really moving towards either polarity but rather spinning in circles caught in the middle. That's how it seems to me anyways.

I think that really what this forum is missing and what C_A needed but didn't get here was gentleness, softness and listening compassion. I certainly don't have a talent for being gentle, as you've already noted, but I do still try to help.

He did get that, only it was done via pm.
We talked a lot, even the day he left.

I would bet money other people also connected with him in a more nurturing way via pm.

Maybe so, but that clearly didn't give him the overall impression of the place and on many occasions he expressed similar things publicly so whatever he was getting through PMs clearly wasn't enough to offset the feelings he got from the rest of the place.

Personally, I'm not a 'rose coloured glasses' kind of person. I can acknowledge people do things in ignorance or unintentionally while still acknowledging that harm can still come from that. I'm not trying to put down the members of the forum, I am trying to bring light to what I observed in regards to the ways he seemed to often be hurt by this place.

Brushing off the hurt with 'everyone does their best' is exactly the kind of talk I think he was very bothered by, and which also bothers me. People aren't perfect so I don't feel the need to justify their every action as being part of some cosmic lesson plan. Pain doesn't need justification, it needs nurturing and care. This is something I didn't properly understand when interacting with him before either. I wish I could go back now and be a lot wiser with my words, but I also accept responsibility for any hurt I may have caused.

I agree it is unlikely there are many, if any, individuals who are consciously and intentionally trying to be cruel or hurtful, but the fact is someone doesn't have to be conscious or intentional to be harmful and just because one thing may not seem harmful to someone doesn't mean it doesn't hurt someone else.

My point being that what I would really 'point the finger' at on this forum is really just simple carelessness with words. I think that often the power of words is grossly underestimated and I am also guilty of that carelessness. However, this can never be addressed if anytime someone gets hurt its brushed off as 'their interpretation'. This 'everyone for themselves' attitude does not befit a cooperative community, in my eyes.