Why I am a Vegan

[Diana]

I respond now because I believe I have a better understanding on this free will vs compassion divide. What initially stimulated me was the bracketed "to choose torture and death" comment. There is so much more going on underneath the surface of what we reveal to each other. That stimulating comment reminded me very much of how my mother used to talk. A guilt inducing comment aimed at orienting my behaviour to a more acceptable configuration. This is how compassion is perverted into a strategy, and why I am sensitive to such terms. I obviously cannot speak as to why Diane used such a term. But I can surely reveal why It was personally stimulating for me. 

From my point of view, it's a good thing that uncomfortable memories surfaced for you. This, in my opinion, is a message, and it has value for you. I don't mean to sound didactic, or that I know everything, or imply it has anything to do with what you eat. I just think feelings like these, from the subconscious or childhood, have meaning.

I don't remember why I made that comment. It was part of a long conversation and taken out of context.  

I went to a Vegan festival today and bought some natural, "activated carbon" toothpaste. I mentioned how important to me it was to start taking care of the teeth that remained in my mouth. A lady next to me said. "It's good for the planet, too". And then the guy selling me this lovely product adds "Yes the bottles are recycled glass"



Now the little wolf in me had all sorts of imaginary comments. First was "Did I ask for your input here!?" and then I thought about the guy "Why can't you look at me when serving?"

I quickly processed it though when I realised it was just 2 like minded folks communing. We are all vulnerable at heart and that's why we group together in communities. Perhaps it was because I am a white male with broad shoulders? Who knows. I know one thing though. I missed the opportunity to express to them that I felt lonely in that moment and had just as much a need for community as they do. Oh well. 

It is very difficult to feel alone when with people. But it does seem to me you have some responsibility in this feeling. It sounds like you rejected them, not they rejected you. But maybe it wasn't that simple. It is challenging to convey entire meaning with words on a page.

I'm sorry for your loneliness. In fact, my heart goes out to all who suffer.