What is it with me?

[Aion]

If I got anymore real with myself I'd become inside-out, the problem is realizing what parts are legitimately me and what's just conditioning/personality shell.

I'm so sick from the other thread that I literally feel dizzy, that's what I get for being real with myself and showing it uncensored to others.

I have noted many peculiarities in my astrology chart, but I cannot seem to fathom the relationships or what it all means...

You know if you can read charts you should make a thread advertising so, I know MANY people would love a further in-depth description of their charts.

Aha I'm still an amateur as far as astrology goes, although I do know how to read the symbols on the chart and understand some of the relationships. Perhaps in time as I get more familiar I'll offer something like that. I've always taken note of the particular geometry in each chart I see because it's all about geometric relationships. Yours shows actually a strong attempt to bring balance to many different sides. However, like I said, Love and Death are two areas which I think are challenging for you. I think this is because you see them as opposed, when really they are two sides of the same coin.

Have you ever heard of Le Petit Morte? It means "the little death" and it is a reference to the orgasm. That might be something for you to think on.