Is knowing still caring?

[Ankh]

Hello

I have been reading the Law of One and I am now almost done with book 3.... lol I feel that since I have became aware of my polarization towards service to others that it has kinda hindered my ability to really feel this connection.... (Not really... I feel like the word hinder is reall a hyperbillous statement) lol.... but it has made me aware of it.... Now when I give someone money or food if they need it... I think to myself..... lol am I giving this to them because it comes from the kindness of my heart or am I doing it because it will help me polarize towards positive but then I think... does that help you polarize positive if you are doing it to polarize to positive? lol Paradox?!

What do you guys thing? lol I am just going with the flow now and I know when I really do great things for another or for earth that I feel it inside and i believe that is what really matters.

Give it some time. You have just got aware that helping others aids your polarization, so sit with this knowledge for a while. Get to know this new awareness and see how it makes you feel in different situations. Service to others is a life long lesson, which is spanning over thousands and thousands of years for native third density entities. For wanderers, these lessons may perhaps come in one incarnation, but are in no way easy. So just sit with this new awareness and give it some time.

On a practical side I would use a metaphor of a manager who tells his employees to always smile to customers and be nice to them. As an employee you might then always smile to customers and be nice to them, but if it doesn't come from a genuine place within you, from the heart - because *you* want to do this, not because your manager told you to - then it doesn't matter how much you smile and are being nice, it still doesn't aid your positive polarization, right? And so is, in my opinion, your situation of caring and knowing. Polarization is a result of opening the heart, not intellectually understanding the function of it. 

I think that meditation in this case is the best tool. To sit with what you now know. Contemplate. Analyze. Pray. Or whatever you find working for you. And just give it time.