If you activate your green-ray too early, how do you repair the damage?

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Thank you SO much for putting up your video. Don't judge me when I say it was a delight to watch, at least until you've heard me out. ;D

Fuse, where were you when I needed you? lol.
Thank you so much for the validation... I think 80% of my confusion dissipated just from your reply, although I kinda expected that I would get people saying "that looks like psychosis to me" cos I'm very erratic in that video.

That was one of the most fascinating sermons on the experience of awakening to the realities of this world that I have ever encountered. Not a word of it sounded crazy to me. Quite the contrary. It was lucid, accurate, and amazingly organized.

Seriously, where were you? lol
Life since then has honestly been like that scene in the matrix when you are walking around knowing .. and every single person you encounter is the 'background people' / part of the programme. (not that I see them that way.. but like that.. realization that you are not experiencing or viewing or perceiving the world the same as anyone else in your life, and so therefore have to come to some kind of logical conclusion that... well, the 'majority', don't see it my way, and the only way to validate my experience is through 'other people' validating it, else it's my own secret-crazy).

Having watched the video, I'm more certain than ever of my "diagnosis," as it were. You definitely touched intelligent infinity. That moment when you were lying in bed and connected into Source and saw the universe from its perspective and knew all truth...the information you momentarily acquired vanished from your mind because you slipped out of the meditative state and broke the connection when you got up to go shout it from the rooftops! It's not that you weren't supposed to see it, it's that you closed your Eye. That state is still out there for you, and connecting into it is a birthright that has been stolen from us. (And when you figure out how, let us know, or start a mystery school or something.) But you penetrated that veiling, and the light of the Creator came ripping down into the darkness here. It didn't do anything to harm you.

I tried for more than 2 years every thing to get access again. At the time, I was recording my food diaries, my activities, and what I was listening to, etc. And I have repeated it, and have never got it back again. I had spent a few months detoxing and deliberately eating pinealgland foods/decalcifying diet, and that night I was listening to "Seth Speaks" before bed. Everyone I spoke to about it, has never validated it, in fact, I got quite the opposite reaction.

This is the blog post I did about it for my own "memory" reasons: Download of Knowledge from Source

But it sure as hell did light you up like a searchlight to every dark entity around.
They would have flocked to you instantly. Some would have come to feed off of you, and some would have come to repair the breach your Light made in their control systems. They do that by battering you back down into low vibrations, as you intuited at the time. They do it by implanting your astral body (or other levels of your multidimensional form) with...things of an apparently technological nature.

I wish I had believed in such things at the time, but I was one of those people who thought that if you believe in evil, you experience it, or that only people who believe in that kind of thing, experience it, that it's all what we believe, and so ... if I don't believe... then it doesn't exist hehehe.. so... I wasn't looking for that (until everything fell apart.. but that was like maybe a year after this experience)

They definitely do it by manipulating the people around you, as you also knew. And those that they really, REALLY have, are people with some deep darkness that they harbor in their soul...something that they do that is so wrong, at least by their own standards, that they crave the darkness so that they can hide in it. Those people are the ones they send after you, and they might do it by driving you to them. Good times.  

Good times. Lol. I like your sense of humour
Ironically though, the tarot keeps spitting out this card to me... "try to see the humour in the situation" and it's like.. yeah... still not there

As I've done a lot of work on myself since then, it's really interesting that there seems to be less of a dark influence around. But at that time when everything flipped, I was filled with so much shame and humiliation for sacrificing myself for another, to try and remove "their" demons. And as I was trying to "not believe that", I was wondering why the heck I believed that I was doing that at the time. This is definitely something that is hard to re-integrate (even though it feels sooooo true right now, not just for my "ego"), but it's hard to re-integrate because I don't want to 'blame' anything external for what happened, because I can only work on myself, however, with this knowledge, with this validation I guess, with this "idea that I might not of been crazy to think that"... it's like, well, if you know they exist - really, then life is seen through a completely different lens. I've been using that lens. But I've been also "trying to not" use that lens because I can't vocalize it, it's just something that I can only talk about with me and my "whatever is listening to me" in my mind/or invisible allies etc. But

This was my 'mainstream' way of letting people know they exist - without validating that they exist hehe. Removing Negative Entities

The wonderful news, though, is that you are in no way crazy. You are also, in no way, alone. If you hadn't already, you HAVE found people you can talk to about these things, and there are millions of more of us out there (though most of them don't know who they are yet). We're engaged in an effort to retake this planet from the dark entities that enslaved it several hundred thousand years ago. Yes, there are billions (trillions) of dark entities here. Earth, it seems, is their last bastion. But they are vastly outnumbered by the Light entities who have come to watch us liberate ourselves (and help where our free will allows).

Where are all these other people I can talk my crazy with?

A last bit of good news for now is that you also are entirely capable of protecting yourself. You'd been working on manifesting so you probably know the process, but I'll summarize it for anyone else's convenience. You invoke (or draw down, or give yourself over to) your magical personality, your Higher Self, that version of you from the far distant future that has transcended time and space entirely and comes back to oversee its own learning. While intending to give over control to your higher self (the Intention part is crucial), you simply visualize a white light descending through your chakras from the universe above, or a white pillar of light surrounding you, or handing over the controls to Player Two, whatever works. (And interestingly, I also don't "see" much while visualizing, but it doesn't seem to matter in the slightest as long as the imagination is engaged.) You next establish an emotional connection to the outcome you desire to create (in this case, manifesting a situation where you are free from all interference by negative entities). Note that only positive outcomes are possible to manifest,  you cannot apparently manifest a negating reality, say, "so and so will not bother me" or, "I will not be poor," that sort of thing. It must be a positive assertion, say, "I will remain unmolested by negative people," or "I will always have enough money for my needs and wants." It's a good idea to codify the intention with a proclamation. I usually write these out ahead so I can have it clear in mind. Once you've proclaimed it, the crucial bit is to tap into the multidimensional future where you have already achieved the desired outcome, and you live going forward from that moment in that mindset. Victory HAS been achieved! Now, it is a matter of putting it joyfully out of your mind and simply allowing the universe time to catch up, since our thick, dark veiling causes manifestation to happen slowly. Try not to think about it until the process completes, but simply have faith that it is underway.

I love this analogy "handing over the controls to Player Two,"

Manifest a reality where you are free from all implants and protected from all negative attacks. Manifest a reality where you cancel any agreements you made along the way to take darkness into yourself. (He probably felt great for a while there, but once you cleared yourself, they just went right back to him.) Then, join us in manifesting a reality for this planet where the darkness is gone.

Surprisingly I see little change in the ... catalyst-shall-we-say. He seems to be the same no matter what. Just quiet guy to me.. maybe, but very.. cheeky/degrading when he's with his homies. Just young. I do pray/intend good will, always do clearings on the work-place, I do so many things to try and clear that whole area. It doesn't seem to make a difference, except I can't "not" do it... it's like.. "well, I don't know if it's doing anything but I still trust everyone's souls... just their avatar might not be playing very nice, but .. their soul's probably know what they are doing. They are probably - on a soul level - very humble to offer themselves as the catalyst to other people? hehe.. who knows..