11-19-2016, 02:02 PM
(11-15-2016, 06:22 PM)Rax0r Wrote: I'm getting desperate.
When I came round to the awareness of being one, having seen the creator for myself as I am. Having believed I am the one,
I have such a huge ego, I feel like I can't keep my mouth stum. The only reason I believe i'm here was to help everyone, espiecially after having that nuke dream. I want to talk let flow the information and help everyone.
I need to tell you the story. In my life I have always tried to understand people, why people are the way they are. Why they are thinking about life like that. What is their perception. I did this because of fear, I was afraid of being hurt again. I was guessing, what are they thinking about me? It got so bad to the point that I was believing I was different. There was something wrong with me, why is everyone staring at me? I became so paranoid and depressed.
I'm over that part of my life now and this has helped me gain an understanding, about why others may think the way they do. How people can easily misinterpret other people. I see myself almost as the translator, trying to help people. Trying to make sure people understand each other. This was before reading the Law of One.
But I feel like I understand it so well I could people change their beliefs to the Law of One. I can help them see the light. Help everyone gain the perspective of being the creator.
As I awakened while reading the Law of One, and I was in bed sleeping I had 2 strange dreams. The first I was looking for something, something hidden in strange multi platform room. It was getting closer, suddenly I realised. Then BAM all of sudden I saw a alien head with big eyes staring at me, I woke and it was still there imprinted on my vision when I woke. Then a voice, maybe it was mine maybe it was his just said "let it happen".
As I went back to sleep I had another strange dream, I was walking through the street, with someone. He said to me look at everyone being incarnated here. And out of all of them you have been chosen. Look they are all you. You can either come back here, again and again or you can do something. I woke up and there was a small mark on my leg, like an ingrown hair.
I feel like I have been manipulated, like I'm being forced to do something.
I live in a crowded city, I'm surrounded by world events on the TV, everywhere I look devastation. Mindless masses.
I'm in such a state, I can help them. But there is the law of free will, I can't interfere. Its like I have finally been given a chance to possibly help. But instead I can't. I can't speak freely because I feel who am I to change things here. I turn on the radio and I hear subtle messages all the time. I'm applying all the messages to myself, Almost as if everything is meant for me. Its driving me crazy.
Its like aloth of the things I have seen are all forcing me do do something. All the messages of the past, matrix, neo, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKpFFD7aX3c Frodo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pjAAC13al9s. Are now coming into play.
I can't live my life like this, I'm so emotionally attached to the situation, I can't just do nothing. And wait for people to become awaken. I can't just leave subtle signs like look "inside you" or anything. Its tearing me apart I see all the signs others miss. And feel like I can't do anything to help. Why? because I don't want to interfere, I don't want to cause more pain to people. I don't want to control other peoples perceptions.
There is a clear gap, people who are awakened, and people who are not. The people who are awakened believe they are right, the people who are not believe they are right. Who is to say what is the right perception. I want to bridge the gap, but I can't because I don't want to interfere.....and because of it I feel the love gone.I am continuously feeling anxious. In worry,
More signs from my brother of the chaos theory, butterfly book. People keep talking to me about the universe, its unbearable.
Its like finally I have found a way to help people, but I can't do it.
Its like I understand everyone's problems but I can't help anyone. I can't tell people, I can't even try to make them understand because it would be manipulating others to my way of thinking. I can't do anything.
Its like watching the destruction of the world from the sidelines or through your tv. Holding the peace treaty that could of prevented it. But in doing so would subject everyones freedom to thinking the are all one.
The divide is clear the awakened/enlightened vs the non awakened.
Its like I have been thrown into a room, and been forced to choose two doors. Do nothing, keep your mouth shut and don't help anyone. Or do something which could disastrously effect the world.
The problem is choice. I only have this group to discuss the problem with.
I have no council, no chamber of wise people help me decide. Nobody who will understand. I'm in agony, but I'm staying alive somehow, waking each day, repeating the same nightmare. I need to tell someone!
This picture is exactly how I'm feeling at the moment: https://alpha.wallhaven.cc/wallpaper/161723