Who is afraid of death?

[Immortalis Vigil]

I am afraid of what I might have to experience after death.
I focused so much on things that I really don't want to happen.
But they might be manifested after death, and I'll be forced to experience them.
I don't know why I thought so hard on certain nasty things.

Every experience enriches the glory of the infinite creator. There is no such thing as mistakes. There is no such thing as a purely bad experience. Every experience is an opportunity to learn. Sometimes that may mean we simply have to experience a hardship to stop fearing it.

Fear is the concern of a finite mortal being, with beginning and end. Your mortality is an illusion. God does not fear what may come next, god experiences infinitely, grows infinitely, and becomes infinitely more complex with each passing experience.

It sounds like you are spending a lot of time thinking about the future, which has created anxiety.

To quote Lao Tzu,

"If you are depressed,
you are living in the past.
If you are anxious,
You are living in the future.
If you are at peace,
you are living in the present."

Be at peace my brother, everything else is illusion and madness.