Who is afraid of death?

[Bourbon Betty]

I am afraid of what I might have to experience after death.
I focused so much on things that I really don't want to happen.
But they might be manifested after death, and I'll be forced to experience them.
I don't know why I thought so hard on certain nasty things.

Let me write what my experience was like and hope it illuminates.

First you see a slowly rotating light that comes from all living things that seems to spin around the object you are looking at, eventually the spinning light and its location in relation to where you think you are in your mind becomes clearer, as it does the people you've known seem less real and more like objects you really should have spent your life loving. As the moment approaches you start to understand how silly all your mistakes were, especially in context of two piles of people the people you haven't met because of the mistakes and the people in the few mistakes of all the things you've met before, then you start to realize how easily you could just integrate them all into yourself and create a new paradise, and realise that since you could create a paradise if the people weren't in your way, you remove the people that were in your way and descend back into the world, for a moment compltely unaware that you've removed people from your life by integrating them so well into yourself that you no longer need to see or interact with them in any way to know what they want, for you not to go into that space again and be happy with who you are. After a while the awe at being able to disintegrate everyone and reintgrate wears off and you realize that what you disintegrate was a kidney, a lung, a heart, brain, or so on, and that you died in the process, no one was just kind enough to tell you about it because... well... You know...

Then you slowly start to wake into a dream of no one mentioning to you that you're omnipotent, and you notice... people... look at you a bit odd and a bit like they were constantly kissing. I interpert the last part as the mouth to mouth as your brain starts to run out of oxygen, but still, its nice. The pain in death does not come from death but from how little effort you put into the paintings of the faces of yourself that you'll hang around with for an eternity, now that the paintings have come to life.

Hope that helps