Meditation

[Dandelionlight]

Throughout my life, I've, personally, experienced problems with awareness; far too many to elaborate upon quickly. I believe that these problems have been caused by a VP shunt malfunction, which lead to seizures. There have been days when these seizures seemed to be unbearable. However, one day in particular from February or March of 2011 when I had a group of seizures that lasted around an hour and were more physically damaging than any other. Left untreated, I have dealt with crushing and burning sensations in my head, a shunt that has shifted terribly and continues to shift due to its comparison to my height, emotional insecurity and concern for the future. I have had some problems such as tingling and scalding pressure that has lead to seizures, even during meditation.
Today, during meditation at 11:00AM, I felt a tingling sensation in my head that nearly resembled static in mild seizures or the aftershock of seizures. Although I have been doing alright compared to times in the past, I still hold onto my concern for what happened to me in the past-especially on the day of the worst seizure to this day that I am aware of-and how meditation is affecting me. Sometimes, meditation burns my head or causes cerebro spinal fluid over drainage. However, today was so different! Could this mean that I'm getting better, maybe? Is there such a thing as "getting better" when I can tell that my brain has endured some sort of damage? Can meditation help me?...  Mon., Feb.3,2014 11:36PM

Hi Dani,

I might not know much, but it seems you do a lot of researches on your current issue already. May I ask if you have checked with a  neurologist or similar people about your current health issue? Through what you're trying to say, it doesn't seem like a healthy familial environment that you live in. I don't really understand why you have to hide your medical issues, but can you get help? Is there any limitation that you cannot or you already did extensive self-help already but the result is still the same?

Hope the best for you.