11-07-2015, 03:11 AM
Heh.
Listen. These traits you ask of me to be are already I.
It is others who reject me typically. Go tell them to be such ways. I already am. I have and typically try to be in social situations. They seldom work out for me. Usually a friend doesn't invite me to a group thing or everyone is constantly unavailable as am I despite my attempts to make time for them. The same doesn't happen in return.
Example, friend of mine wanted to hang out this week, except she's only available after 10pm and I work all week 10pm to 6am. Try to reschedule for next week. Never heard anything back.
Most recent ex (not the one I mentioned on my OP or in my post, that's my baby mama ex) actually mirrored me to try and make me stay with her, when I waited for her to contact me first for once I heard nothing for 10 days, I thought she left me cause I was weird so I get a hold of her. She says I disappeared and was like every other guy tried to explain myself and she says its all my fault, I'm the problem and such.
Seems to be a theme in my life. Girls projecting their issues unto me then flipping out on me when they get quickly drawn out by my presence, letting them be themselves they judge me through themselves. The only exception was my baby mama ex, I was too immature for her at the time in terms of handling a family.
I don't actually know what family is so it was rough when she got pregnant but I got over it, I apologized and tried to be there for her but I was scared and didn't have any idea how. And she had already fallen out of love with me by that point.
Actually, even though it was 3 years ago, I would still get back with her and try it ALL over again. But that won't happen. Ever. So I move forward. But this is getting into non-spiritual relationships. I've never had a spiritually imbued one.
I don't even know if I have friendships in person right now -_-
But I know I've had a spiritual level of sex. But I also just enjoy intimate sex like crazy (or as Jade pointed out..maybe I got imprinted to Love intimate sex a lot). I do not know the why's. I just miss the things that brought such questions in those realms at all.
Much more preferable to wondering about the OIC's reasons for desiring the more twisted things of 3D life... those Why's suck to think about ~
Listen. These traits you ask of me to be are already I.
It is others who reject me typically. Go tell them to be such ways. I already am. I have and typically try to be in social situations. They seldom work out for me. Usually a friend doesn't invite me to a group thing or everyone is constantly unavailable as am I despite my attempts to make time for them. The same doesn't happen in return.
Example, friend of mine wanted to hang out this week, except she's only available after 10pm and I work all week 10pm to 6am. Try to reschedule for next week. Never heard anything back.
Most recent ex (not the one I mentioned on my OP or in my post, that's my baby mama ex) actually mirrored me to try and make me stay with her, when I waited for her to contact me first for once I heard nothing for 10 days, I thought she left me cause I was weird so I get a hold of her. She says I disappeared and was like every other guy tried to explain myself and she says its all my fault, I'm the problem and such.
Seems to be a theme in my life. Girls projecting their issues unto me then flipping out on me when they get quickly drawn out by my presence, letting them be themselves they judge me through themselves. The only exception was my baby mama ex, I was too immature for her at the time in terms of handling a family.
I don't actually know what family is so it was rough when she got pregnant but I got over it, I apologized and tried to be there for her but I was scared and didn't have any idea how. And she had already fallen out of love with me by that point.
Actually, even though it was 3 years ago, I would still get back with her and try it ALL over again. But that won't happen. Ever. So I move forward. But this is getting into non-spiritual relationships. I've never had a spiritually imbued one.
I don't even know if I have friendships in person right now -_-
But I know I've had a spiritual level of sex. But I also just enjoy intimate sex like crazy (or as Jade pointed out..maybe I got imprinted to Love intimate sex a lot). I do not know the why's. I just miss the things that brought such questions in those realms at all.
Much more preferable to wondering about the OIC's reasons for desiring the more twisted things of 3D life... those Why's suck to think about ~