Panic anxiety attacks thread

[Ankh]

Dear Ankh,

First I'd like to thank you for taking the time to share your experience. While several of us disagree on the forums about a variety of issues, it's always nice to read about how others handle life. It's inspiring in many ways.

I have personally experienced in the past anxiety attacks of a short duration. They were triggered by an objectively small yet traumatizing life event at age 11 and the emotion which I felt at that moment kept on repeating itself in similar settings until a couple of years ago. The anxiety attack would last only 1 to 2 minutes; as soon as I would feel it, I would ask myself why I feel this way, and look around me, confirming there would be no reason to panic, and so it dissipated. About two years ago, when I became more aware of lucid dreaming and meditation exercises, I proceeded to dive deeper into myself and little by little facing my fear and healing it over the span of several months. It makes over a year since I have felt this anxiety and I believe it is gone for good. If it comes back, I will know how to deal with it by accepting this part of myself that still needs healing

Your panic attacks are on a grander scale than my own, yet I see a lot of myself in you, Ankh. Like you, I am a person who is easily stressed out and who, if I am not careful, will tire myself over tasks in a determined fashion. I noticed this tendency at a young age thanks to a great friend of mine and proceeded to gravitate towards a calmer way of life. When I would feel sick, stressed or desperate, he would gently tell me "Tina, why don't you go/stay home today?", to which I would reply, a well-trained robot I was "No, I MUST work!", and he would always finish with a conclusive statement along these lines: "Tina, there are many opportunities for work in the world, but you only have one body. Your health is paramount. Do not wait until you are sicker and weaker to take a break". I could never debate that. Indeed, I have come to agree that our health in paramount, especially so if one desires to help others in the present and in the future; do we provide better service when we are sickly or healthy? The answer is an easy one and it is ever clear to me. It is usually when we feel our best that we can also give our best.

I am no doctor Ankh but it seems to me that the crux of your issues stem from emotional issues which have yet to be resolved. I am open to entities of the negative polarities playing out our distortions and enlarging them as it has happened to me in the past, however the source is, in my experience, within and pre-existing. The fact that drinking alcohol helps relieve the strain you feel is another clue which points to the argument that this would not be a psychic greeting but rather an inner trouble which, when externalized, expresses itself as great anxiety and panic. In my experience, alcohol and psychic greetings create other types of problems In the same line of thought, you also speak of panic attacks being triggered in settings where there are a lot of people present, reminiscent of the PTSD you were previously treated for. You are very aware and so there is little advice I can give you except perhaps suggesting to look within and seeing what is left of this, uncovering slowly the part of you that still suffers and asking her how she could be aided in her recovery I find that writing, meditating and lucid dreaming (or contemplation) has helped me a lot with my own problems.

Finally, before I finish this long reply, I would like to address one last thing. You seem to be very demanding of yourself, expecting yourself to work no matter the cost, even in times where your whole body and mind are screaming for rest. Allow me to ask you, helper, what would you tell a patient of yours if they came to you and asked for advice in regards to a similar situation? If they told you they were in pain, facing anxiety attacks such as your own, would you tell them to take medication and go on, that duty towards "positive polarity" is more important than taking care of their health, or would you tell them to take the time they require to heal and to have more compassion towards themselves?

I know what I would tell another, as I just did, and it would be a consistent advice I would give myself. What about you, dear?

Tina, first of all thank you for your compassionate and thoughtful reply!

Secondly, not that it got me upset, but you do make assumptions in your post, of which, in my thinking you know nothing about. For instance if who I am and how I work. I don't know you either, but from that little you have posted, especially lately, I could have made assumptions about you too. And I do have some, although nothing I would want to express publically on this forum. Do you see where I am coming from?

Either way, thank you, my dear sister for your thoughts and your concern. I am not currently in the resonance with you and especially your hubby.

May our paths cross once again when we are in resonance and harmony with each other, which I'm sure will happen.

Om the personal note: I've been where you are, went through what you've been through, and even had a mate who soooo much reminds me of yours. This is like seeing the whole thing, minus some details, from the side. But each is creating it's own path, it's own experience, and it's own love/light. Good luck to you and know that you will always have a faithful friend/sister in me.

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Careful mixing tranquilizer with alcohol. Had some friends who liked to party by mixing those. Many a friend would pass out after 1 pill + 3 beers or have super slurred speech and not remember much.

Probably not a good idea for a first date to mix and drink more than a few drinks. Although it depends on the type of first date I suppose. The girls I've been on first dates with who got hammered usually wanted only one thing.

Either way, have fun and be safe.

Thanks sweety! What you wrote is what I've been worrying about too. But it went very well and I'm soon to be home with no side-effects as far as I can see for now.

*phew* I made it!!