A call for help.

[Patrick]

...what aggresses against me constantly. Every night I am surrounded by shadows with a constant head pain. I am told pure manipulative lies when I try to receive guidance. When I try to heal myself spiritually in meditation my body goes absolutely cold and I can feel pain in my stomach...

I went through this 2 years ago.

Remember that everything is a part of YOU, including what you describe here. I would suggest that you stop fighting against it and instead accept it and give of your energy freely. Love the attackers because they are just a part of you trying to become accepted. They are a part of you that will ultimately bring strength to your whole self.

Remember that your energy is infinite, so you can never truly lack any. You will feel cold at first, but the more you let this truth comes to you, the less long the cold will be felt each night.

Warmth will take less time to come back once you realize that "they" (your other-selves) can feed on your light while you can still have infinite light available to your self.

Much love and light to you brother.