Studying Forgiveness

[Sacred Fool]

 

https://llresearch.org/transcripts/issue..._0617.aspx

What caused this entity to become a creature of such agony, such pain, that it must turn and hurt others? How very sad is all that that entity has experienced that has so soured, embittered and caused this entity to become negative and controlling of others because it cannot control the self, unloving of others because it cannot love the self, unforgiving of others because it cannot forgive the self. There is much to pray for in this entity’s despair, and as you pray you will find strength and compassion flowing through you, as you deliberately strengthen yourself inwardly, with a knowledge of your own birthright, by loving yourself, forgiving yourself, and girding yourself about with light. So shall you become strong enough to love.

https://llresearch.org/transcripts/issue..._0415.aspx

When the experiences of the childhood were ones in which much was unforgiven, criticized, denied or rejected, the pilgrim shall have, shall we say, the knee-jerk reaction to deal with, of a feeling of not forgiving the self. Others it may forgive, but until one has come to some deep archetypical emotion within which expresses itself to the spirit in the words, “You are forgiven, you are loved,” that entity shall have a great deal of trouble loving the self, and thus, its forgiveness and compassion towards others masks a deep and abiding ache, a wound so terrible that it cannot be described, a wound of the self that will not forgive the self for being human.

All entities have help available to them. None need rely upon the self. But to those whose childhoods have been experienced as accepting and cherishing and nurturing will come those entities which are personal, speak personally to the entity, are intimate with the entity, and become the objective vision which encompasses the wall of self-forgiveness. Those who have been caused to believe that they cannot be as they are and be loved learn to behave and carry into their relationship with love an entity which behaves, rather than an entity which is as it is. In this case the same help is available, but it shall come to the entity in an impersonal form. Such impersonal forces, principles and entities, are as we, those who speak as inspiringly as possible through each instrument of the depth and resonance of the self of each of you, calling to you to call within yourself, acceptance, love and forgiveness.


You carry upon your backs, unless you forgive yourself every day, a terrible, terrible burden. The variousness of catalyst and experience among your peoples is intended and is guaranteed to create within the experience a subjective concept and opinion of the self as having come up short, of having failed in some way. Where, then, is salvation? It is within you, each of you. Roll the stone away from the tomb of low self-esteem, of self-doubt, of prejudice against the self. Think of yourself as an object other than yourself. Gaze upon the self as upon a stranger, and you will find that your opinion of yourself is changed, for you do not judge others as you judge yourself.

 
https://llresearch.org/transcripts/issue..._0712.aspx

Now, it is sure that no one wishes not to forgive. There seems to be no question in the mind of anyone who is seeking along the path of positive polarity in the third density that it is very desirable to forgive and to accept forgiveness, yet there may be nothing harder in the catalog of human weakness, shall we say, or distortion, than the unbalanced feeling of helplessness when one realizes one is quite incapable of altering the consciousness which is not forgiving. Hardness of heart among those who seek is very often totally unmeant and undesired. It is the nature of the third-density illusion of your planetary sphere that within the illusion you will be taken beyond your limits and fail according to the conscious methods of judging among your peoples. This is perhaps the most common source of the lack of forgiveness among your peoples—the difficulty of forgiving the self for having seemingly failed. Also, and almost as common, there are those dynamic tensions betwixt members of the same family which involuntarily renew themselves and prohibit forgiveness.


The chief roadblock stopping one from forgiving is the instinct for self-preservation. One who forgives is changed—something dies and something is born. Yet that which is born cannot begin to be born until whatever it was that was not forgiven has been done away with by true forgiveness. To hold the self or another in unforgiveness is [to] hold in a pristine and clear condition a relationship or a self-concept.

When forgiveness takes place, there is a little death, and sometimes not so very small a death indeed, for sometimes that which is to be forgiven has been held in a hard heart for a long time. It is natural to fear death, yet the road to joy, or shall we say, the way to perceive joy along the road we all travel is to rush towards whatever oblivion must be embraced in order to forgive, for the creation that springs forth from the heart to one who has truly forgiven is a beautiful and fresh manifestation.

It is very difficult to create appropriate atmosphere for forgiveness using the conscious mind. The conscious mind is a kind of business man, ordering things, prioritizing them, and moving them about. It is within the province of that great subconscious mind which is so important to the seeker that the seeds of forgiveness are sown, are nourished, and grow. Thus, the attempts to forgive by consciously stating, “I wish to forgive,” are likely to be failures, although the attempt is metaphysically important, and is a part of the soul’s history. It is more effective by far to await meditative time before doing work in the consciousness of forgiveness.

If you wish to speed the process of forgiveness, may we suggest that you take the object which has not been forgiven by you and hold that object within the heart and mind, enveloped and encircled in light, light infinite and light illimitable, hoping and praying for every good for that which you cannot forgive. Thus, you are engaging a deeper portion of yourself to begin opening doors, so that that which is unforgivable to the conscious mind slowly becomes that which must be forgiven. It cannot be forced; it cannot be taught. And when someone attempts to persuade the seeker into forgiveness, and does so on its own energy, then as soon as the intermediary removes itself, the hardness of heart returns.

Please remember at all times when you see hardheartedness in others or yourself, that you are powerful to serve as messengers of love, peace and joy. You may encourage, exhort, commune and just be with one who is having difficulty, and by your mirroring forgiveness and love to the one you wish to aid, you are connecting your subconscious and your companion’s subconscious in great echoes of compassion. Sometimes no word need to be said for this comforting effect to take place. Never doubt your value to one another, for you are the Creator. You are love, each to the other. May you dwell in a world where forgiveness is actively sought and joy is nourished by all conversation.

My friends, it seems while you are in the midst of the third-density illusion that the stream of your life experience moves slowly and endlessly. Yet, we urge you to make some attempt to realize how very fleeting birdsong, brook’s rill and the wind in the trees are, how very short is your time to gain experience upon your beautiful planetary sphere. May you find zest and joy in your inward walk. May your eyes behold the creation of your brothers and sisters of air, earth, wind, fire and all the creatures of those densities. May you love life as you experience it, and may you find comfort in each other.

 
https://llresearch.org/transcripts/issue..._0917.aspx

The idea of forgiving the self is not to find a strand here and a strand there and a strand in the third place of perceived unforgiven self and pluck those out. It is to embrace such perceived moments with the hope of opening the self to the unity of that imperfection with the perfection it balances, so that you may see that you are not a “good” being and attempting to destroy the “bad” being that may exist beneath the floor of the “good” being. Rather, you are attempting to become a full, circular and robust self that knows its shadow side, knows its virtues and knows that neither is the true tale of the self but only the process that is occurring to allow the self to move ever deeper into that self, that interior road to the centre of self that lightens as it goes until, in the very center of self, in the heart of self, in the tabernacle of the Creator within the self, there is a stunning, flooding white light that melts every consideration and allows one to rest in adoration and faith.

https://llresearch.org/transcripts/issue..._0830.aspx

The last artifact of negativity in the open heart is the unforgiven universal self. You think you are serving all those you meet, and you are; but, in more advanced learning, you discover that you serve and are served with no breath between the two, that service is another way of saying praise or thanksgiving or intercession for forgiveness, and you begin working on the universal self within.

[flofrog]

for sure you nourish yourself as well as you nourish others. For sure. Whence its beauty, and the circle is closed

[Ymarsakar]

Useful material, although whether people can use it or not depends on their willpower and dedication to the work.

[AnthroHeart]

It's hard for me to read a wall of text, but I did gleam some from some of the quotes.
Forgiveness was kind of hard, because I had to work at it.
You don't just 100% forgive everything, or anything.
It comes in layers.

[Diana]

All beautiful words by Q'uo, Hatonn, and Yada. For me personally, the following excerpt is of practical use:

Think of yourself as an object other than yourself. Gaze upon the self as upon a stranger, and you will find that your opinion of yourself is changed, for you do not judge others as you judge yourself.

This kind of objective observation is a great way to unhook the attachment to those things which haunt us. We do things as we grow, as we evolve, even when we are children, that in looking back on, as we are now, may be lacking in compassion or understanding. From an objective perspective, if we can achieve this, those acts or thoughts or responses can be put into perspective as we know there was awareness in that area not yet awakened to. But from our current perspective these memories can be tortuous to look at. Deeper are the childhood wounds in dysfunctional family dynamics (which involves every family in 3D to a degree).

What I find of the greatest use in overcoming self-judgment is the idea of gaining evolution of consciousness (which is buried among the flowery texts in the OP). And the following quote from Ra is, in my experience, demonstrative of how this process works:

80.11 ▶ Questioner: Could I say, then, that implicit in the process of becoming adept is the possible partial polarization towards service to self because simply the adept becomes disassociated with many of his kind or like in the particular density which he inhabits?

Ra: I am Ra. This is likely to occur. The apparent happening is disassociation whether the truth is service to self and thus true disassociation from other-selves or service to others and thus true association with the heart of all other-selves and disassociation only from the illusory husks which prevent the adept from correctly perceiving the self and other-self as one.

80.12 ▶ Questioner: Then you say that this effect of disassociation on the service-to-others adept is a stumbling block or slowing process in reaching that goal which he aspires to? Is this correct?

Ra: I am Ra. This is incorrect. This disassociation from the miasma of illusion and misrepresentation of each and every distortion is a quite necessary portion of an adept’s path. It may be seen by others to be unfortunate.

80.13 ▶ Questioner: Then is this, from the point of view or with respect to the fifteenth archetype, somewhat of an excursion into the Matrix of the Spirit in this process? Does that make any sense?

Ra: I am Ra. The excursion of which you speak and the process of disassociation is most usually linked with that archetype you call Hope which we would prefer to call Faith. This archetype is the Catalyst of the Spirit and, because of the illuminations of the Potentiator of the Spirit, will begin to cause these changes in the adept’s viewpoint.

Perhaps this is just the direction I have traveled, and going directly to embrace forgiveness hasn't worked well for me. As is stated above in the OP—it can't be forced. The direction I have taken is more akin to what Ra describes, which leads one to forgiveness without actually having to forgive—it just is as one reaches this disassociation (which paradoxically is one of unity).

[Patrick]

...It cannot be forced; it cannot be taught. And when someone attempts to persuade the seeker into forgiveness, and does so on its own energy, then as soon as the intermediary removes itself, the hardness of heart returns.

Please remember at all times when you see hardheartedness in others or yourself, that you are powerful to serve as messengers of love, peace and joy. You may encourage, exhort, commune and just be with one who is having difficulty, and by your mirroring forgiveness and love to the one you wish to aid, you are connecting your subconscious and your companion’s subconscious in great echoes of compassion. Sometimes no word need to be said for this comforting effect to take place. Never doubt your value to one another, for you are the Creator. You are love, each to the other. May you dwell in a world where forgiveness is actively sought and joy is nourished by all conversation...

This explains much. Thanks !

[jafar]

Forgiveness will be very easy to perform once one understand that the one who forgive and the one who is being forgiven is actually the same 'self'.
Forgiveness will not even be required when one gain full understanding of every-things, as such that even blaming does not even exist.

Will you blame your own hands? your own legs? your own lungs? any parts of your own body?
When you never even blame any of them, forgiveness to any of them is not even required.

Understanding will cause the disappearance of both the need to blame and to forgive.

[Ymarsakar]

Forgiveness will be very easy to perform once one understand that the one who forgive and the one who is being forgiven is actually the same 'self'.
Forgiveness will not even be required when one gain full understanding of every-things, as such that even blaming does not even exist.

Will you blame your own hands? your own legs? your own lungs? any parts of your own body?
When you never even blame any of them, forgiveness to any of them is not even required.

Understanding will cause the disappearance of both the need to blame and to forgive.

Understanding how it works, doesn't allow people to actually do it. Sorta like reading manuals and guides on how to speed run through a game. They still have to develop the skills, reaction time, and do the work.

[Sacred Fool]

Forgiveness will be very easy to perform once one understand that the one who forgive and the one who is being forgiven is actually the same 'self'.
Forgiveness will not even be required when one gain full understanding of every-things, as such that even blaming does not even exist.

Will you blame your own hands? your own legs? your own lungs? any parts of your own body?
When you never even blame any of them, forgiveness to any of them is not even required.

Understanding will cause the disappearance of both the need to blame and to forgive.

That would be true if we had no unconscious self, but for some of us, we suffer immensely, not because we consciously blame ourselves, but because these feelings can become embedded at nearly every level of consciousness.

I have found this one of the most insidious distortions to face up to because unforgiveness is a kind of anti-love which can become immensely powerful.  Just look at the unfortunates who hold simultaneous strong feelings of unity and separation, and cannot move forward because on various unconscious levels the are locked in with self-hatred in one form or another.  Trust me, dude, it is in no way simple.  It's layer upon complex layer.....if, in fact, you chose such lessons for yourself.

The positive side is that, if you can walk through such a stressful hall of mirrors, you come out with a more deeply articulated conscious awareness.
   
  

[jafar]

Legs: I apologize I no longer can run as fast as I used to.
Identity: What is there to apologize? You have aged, you are not as strong as when you were 20 years old, your bone become weaker and your muscle become weaker as you aged, that is part of natural process and I fully understand that. You should not feel guilty because I'm thankful for all the services that you've provided to me.

[zedro]

Most certainly the ulimate puzzle to solve, getting there is another thing. The understanding certainly is essential but how it gets integrated seems to vary greatly. It feels if you can achieve and pierce this understanding purely thru conceptual means, feels like that female mode of healing. For stubborn SOBs like me, the male mode thru agonizing deconstruction of one's life/ego/shadow while boxing at the demons seems to have been the way lol..

[Ymarsakar]

I run faster now than ever before. Don't need as much food too.

Physically, it feels like an upgrade. Recovery time, stamina, power, speed seems more or less the same if slightly less efficient because I have not been training for speed but control.

[Nikki]

Forgiveness - always had a problem with that word. I have tried to forgive but what about forgetting; if one cannot forget how can you forgive? You may excuse a person for what they did but when the trust in a relationship has been damaged, can you get it back after forgiveness? I personally have not had much luck with what they call forgiveness on this planet but then again it is the language that does not really satisfy the essence of who I am. To self, forgiveness means to blame another for hurting you or breaking a trust and you had no fault in the situation. For self, acceptance that we are all ignorant and sometimes we do not always know what we do. I accept them for their ignorance and accept myself as well for my ignorance in the situation. Self acceptance is probably the most important aspect in what one calls forgiveness, acceptance of your ignorance is acceptance of the others ignorance. After the acceptance, it does not mean that things return to normal, but normal on this planet is transient, it may be looked at as a release of blame of yourself first than the other in the situation.

What experience have you had with forgiveness did it work for you or did you still feel hurt, or maybe was the whole situation the illusion of a thought?

Strange place - I posted this reply and yet I am offline according the information beside my name. Laughing.

[Patrick]

I think when we succeed in forgiving, we succeed in truly letting go. So then there is no need to forget because the remembrance no longer hurts as much. But success may not always be possible. I think what is the most important is having the intent to forgive. Success is not a requirement compared to having the intent.

This is a long and difficult journey for many seekers, and many of you have been exploring this path for many lifetimes. And so we encourage the seeker attempting to find their individual selves among a vast collective to offer themselves patience as they find success and failure and stumble in their stride to find this balance. You are not expected to be perfect in your self-awareness or in your awareness in relationship to the collective. The most important aspect of this dynamic that we perceive is the constant attempt to learn from the tensions that one finds in exploring this dynamic and to continue to foster a sense of tenderness and love towards the self and towards other selves.

[flofrog]

I think when we succeed in forgiving, we succeed in truly letting go. So then there is no need to forget because the remembrance no longer hurts as much. But success may not always be possible. I think what is the most important is having the intent to forgive. Success is not a requirement compared to having the intent.

This is a long and difficult journey for many seekers, and many of you have been exploring this path for many lifetimes. And so we encourage the seeker attempting to find their individual selves among a vast collective to offer themselves patience as they find success and failure and stumble in their stride to find this balance. You are not expected to be perfect in your self-awareness or in your awareness in relationship to the collective. The most important aspect of this dynamic that we perceive is the constant attempt to learn from the tensions that one finds in exploring this dynamic and to continue to foster a sense of tenderness and love towards the self and towards other selves.

I agree Patrick, but nothing feels as light and bliss as when we truly forgive, it’s like recuperating innocence, really blissful..

[Diana]

I think when we succeed in forgiving, we succeed in truly letting go. So then there is no need to forget because the remembrance no longer hurts as much. But success may not always be possible. I think what is the most important is having the intent to forgive. Success is not a requirement compared to having the intent.

I find for me it is the other way around (regarding the above bolded). Rather than forgiveness—which is a complex emotional construct dependent upon interconnected feelings, situations, events, traumas, and so on—if I am able to see the bigger picture, detach from the drama of the situation at hand, maybe even look to the Archetypes to get a basic idea of how this reality is designed, then the path forward to letting go is very viable. And when I let go of the drama, forgiveness becomes moot—there is nothing to forgive. So in a sense forgiveness has happened, but in a way that is not emotional. The problem I find with emotional forgiveness is that it is often ephemeral. Detachment from the human drama (the maelstrom) and focus on a wider reality is deeper and more effective (for me).

When staying focused on the bigger reality, the feeling Flofrog brought up—an innocence—is the pervasive mindset, very childlike, because one is not always judging (mental/emotional response to cultural/societal conditions). Everything encountered may be seen as brand new, unencumbered by the past, but at the same time with the advantage of the bigger picture which may include the past but not a past that one is attached to, only a past that may be a reference point either useful or not. This may sound "Spock-like," which people often see me as, but the truth is when you are able to detach, and then let go of judgment, the heart is free to feel everything in abundance (and that means everything, not just love and rainbows) because judgments block the heart. That is not to say you don't still discern—there is that balance between the green-ray and indigo-ray energy centers. The indigo is needed (in my opinion) to give some structure or direction to the green which would otherwise have no boundaries (example would be martyrdom).

[Sacred Fool]

That sounds good, Diana, and also a bit complex.  This perspective, filched from a quotation above, makes it a trifle simpler for moi.

If you wish to speed the process of forgiveness, may we suggest that you take the object which has not been forgiven by you and hold that object within the heart and mind, enveloped and encircled in light, light infinite and light illimitable, hoping and praying for every good for that which you cannot forgive. Thus, you are engaging a deeper portion of yourself to begin opening doors, so that that which is unforgivable to the conscious mind slowly becomes that which must be forgiven. It cannot be forced; it cannot be taught.