advice wanted on past life memories

[Lorna]

my two and a half year old son has started saying some things that sound very much like past life memories and to be honest i'm struggling with how best to respond to these statements

i'm a single parent and his father has never played a part in my son's life, so there is no 'daddy' in his life

he's started talking about his 'daddy and mum and baby sister', when i ask him who i am he replies 'mummy' with a big grin so clearly mummy is different to mum

when he's heard a car toot its horn outside our house, a couple of times he's said 'that's my daddy and mum, bye bye mummy' and started to get his coat

he's also said some strange things like 'aliya's on the roof, i can't find her, i can't find aliya' - he's said this a few times and it has no basis in his life or in any tv or books he would have encountered

today he was frightened by a spider scurrying towards him, he shouted out for his 'daddy and mum'

this is what has particularly got to me today - the fact that when he was scared he called out for people who don't exist in his life now

i really, genuinely don't know how to respond. i can remember my brother talking about a past life when he was younger, but his memories were those of an adult and had a dreamlike quality. my son seems to be remembering another life as a child which is just as real to him, at times seemingly preferable to him, than his life now.

any thoughts or advice would be most welcome

[Monica]

Hi Lorna! What a wonderfully lucky child, to have you for his mom, who understands about past lives and can patiently and lovingly help him integrate that other lifetime! Whereas, if he had parents who didn't believe in reincarnation, they might shush him and not allow him to express those thoughts/memories/feelings.

When my son was little, I was always on the lookout for signs of past life memories. I found the idea exciting! But, other than a strange obsession with trains, he never said anything that seemed to pertain to a past life. I was actually a bit disappointed!

Although, he did remember specific details about his birth in this life, which was very traumatic, so this led me to believe that newly incarnating souls will likely remember whatever it is they need to still integrate, whether that is a past life or events from the current life.

As tragic as it may be to think about the possibility that your son might have died at an early age in that other lifetime, it is also such a joyous occasion, because you can now consciously and lovingly help him thru the memories of that experience.

I would suggest keeping a journal of what he says, as well as recording him whenever possible. I would very gently and casually ask him questions, the same as you might ask him about the playground he visited that day or the toy he got for Christmas. Be careful to not influence him, but just repeat back whatever he says and then ask a related question, always casually and gently, like it's the most normal thing in the world. He may very well remember more details, and be able to express them better as his vocabulary grows.

I would definitely NOT feel slighted in any way. Never for a minute think that he loves those parents more than you...remember that he CHOSE YOU for THIS lifetime!

I'd love to hear more about this as this story unfolds...what a beautiful gift you will be able to give him when he is older...by preserving those glimpses of memories for him to sort thru later if he so chooses. I would have loved for someone to do that for me...I still remember those past-life memories, but how much more has been lost because no one took me seriously?

[Lavazza]

I have no specific advice to give you other than what Monica has already suggested, but just wanted to chime in to offer you my thoughts and support as you raise your little one. I'm a new parent also, I have a nearly 2 year old son and another little one coming in to the world in July.

Love and Light!

[Monica]

Here's one of my fav child past life memory stories:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EWwzFwUO...re=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5965wcH2K...re=related (part 2)

I think it's inspiring how the parents took their child seriously, and helped him work thru the memories and heal. There are many such stories.

---

How exciting, Lavazza! Best wishes on a smooth and beautiful birth! Be sure and let us know of your new arrival!

[Lorna]

thanks monica, you've picked up on my two main concerns there - that he experienced a traumatic, early death and that he has a preference to there rather than here (which in my head i know isn't the case, but still....)

those videos were very interesting. one of my friends had past life memories of being a pilot - she can't remember them now and she would dearly love to know more about her memories but sadly her mum passed away, 15 years ago today actually, and she only knows that she used to talk about her past life experiences a lot, so keeping a record of alexander's comments is probably a good idea

i'll let you know how it goes!

congratulations lavazza - what a lovely time of year for a new bubba to arrive

[Monica]

It does seem rather apparent that he experienced death at an early age. However, I don't think I would interpret his longing for his 'other' parents as necessarily preference.

Try looking at it this way: If, say, a parent had 2 children and lost 1 of them, and missed that person, that would not mean that s/he preferred the lost child over the living child, right? It would just mean that s/he missed the child who left.

Likewise, your son clearly misses his 'other' parents...that's natural! For him, it appears that he lost them fairly recently, at least in his awareness. So what you're seeing is that longing, that missing...I don't think I would interpret that as a preference.

Perhaps by reframing this situation into one of him missing his other loved ones, instead of thinking that he prefers them, it might help you to in turn help him navigate the corresponding emotions without adding your own hurt feelings to the mix.

I think it's natural to feel a bit disconcerted and maybe even a bit hurt. My suggestion is to focus on the honor of having been chosen as this child's mom.

[Ali Quadir]

I am bothered by the fear that if the young one in this discussion is not shown clearly the difference between this world and his memories he can end up living between two worlds. Which has the result of not actually connecting to this one, which in turn has the result of not making the most of it.

In effect he received a body and a life, which is like a Porche, but he'll treat it like a Prius.

It happens a lot. Practically all Wanderers have experienced this, most in my experience never fully resolve it, but past lives can cause the same problems. Imho the kid needs to connect to this world for the obvious reason that he is here, and not there. If he is allowed or stimulated to continue going into the other world then that world will become too large in his experience.

Eventually he's going to have to find a place for the past life. But he'll have to find a place for the current life, right now... And this is the job you find yourself thrown into your lap I'm sure you're able because you were picked by him.

I'm not saying it is wise to deny the past life... It is clearly not. And all previous comments are completely valid and should be taken to heart, write down whatever he says about his past lives and give it back to him when he is old enough. But I suggest a kind of accepting firmness. While the past life memories are accepted for what they are. And the child is allowed to make remarks and think about it. It must be informed and reminded that this past life is a different place from the current life. Just like when you read a book or watch a movie the events of this movie or book are semi real, educational and have a kind of separate existence... They are however not this world and should not be mistaken for it.

This is not an easy situation. I would suggest engaging the child into this world as often as possible and affirming frequently the requirement to be a part of this world. This cannot be forced. The child can only be invited or tempted to come into this world. Forcing it will lead to automatic behavior and a further withdrawal of the soul. So in case of doubt, err on the side of compassion.

I came from another planet I knew this from a young age. This was deeply imprinted on my personality. I did not connect to this world for a long time. Around 25 I met a psychic healer who worked with me for a while. He told me I was wired to self destruct unless I chose to connect to the world. Basically what happens is that you close the solar plexus and the amount of energy that comes from the earth into you is so small that the entire entity starves until he leaves the place he does not want to be. I was already in this process and had already used a knife on myself and had thoughts of suicide.

I had treated all my friends and family as people I was visiting, not as my home or tribe. With courtesy and love, but not with a "You're mine" approach. In other words, I did not take possession of my position as a member of their group. Later, after I accepted the whole human race as my tribe I started connecting and this feels much more vital, vibrant and alive. The other world in my case was my primary world I was only here for a time until I could leave. Now it is secondary to my existence here. Still deeply important to me but secondary to my job to my loved ones and to my presence and responsibilities on earth.

If your child is similarly affected then the birth and early years will likely manifest some problems. I was very premature. I only slept the first year of my life and refused to eat most of my childhood. I was sickly and responded with fear to change. The health behavior of your child which we usually do not call conscious choices will have some "Get me out of here" symptoms. The more you can engage your child to be here the less he will be bothered by similar symptoms if he manifests in the same way I do.

In the situation of the spider, perhaps the proper response would be "I know you miss them and love them, but they are not here. I am, and I love you completely and will do everything in my power to protect you every time you need me."

Your love is the strongest bridge, if you can give him a safe place to exist in and from there explore the world together I'm sure he will find it easier to emotionally connect to this world...

Also... Don't close yourself! If someone comes along to give you some emotional support, and you're certain his intents are pure and his structure is mature, and if you like him. It'd be a pity if you were not in a position to accept. In effect you'll have adopted a personality structure where now it's you that keeps the world at a distance. You don't want to become a dyad with your son. If he is to learn to be open, you must be too...

[Lorna]

thank you ali quadir, it is helpful to read of your experiences

alexander is thankfully very much engaged in the present, his comments like this seem to be mostly when he is a mediative mood, perhaps not fully consious of what he is saying

but yes i agree with you and am very comfortable with the idea of helping him to realise that the past is past - very good advice, thank you

what has surprised me so much is how strongly i'm reacting to his comments, which really are just a reinforcement of what i believe anyway...

and thank you ali quadir for that reminder to remain open

[Ali Quadir]

alexander is thankfully very much engaged in the present

How can he not be with a name like that Good to hear he is doing well.. If it is only in those situations then my worries were little more than a projection of my own experiences. No worries.

Namaste

[Lorna]

a little update:

he's stopped talking so much about his daddy and mum, but he has started talking about, i think, drowning...

the past couple of mornings when he's woken up he's talked about being on a boat, and then falling, being in the water and then being all wet - i just kept asking him 'and then what?' and he finished by making a 'whooooaaaa' noise, all smiley, eyes wide

this morning he talked about being a bigger boy and wanting to go on the boat, asking if he could go on the boat and then saying that he fell

he's quite happy and chatty about it though

[Lorna]

hello again - i'm a bit freaked out again and could do with advice / opinions / thoughts etc

alexander's chat about his other family has completely faded, but now and again he says things that are odd

at my grandmother's funeral, as we were leaving churchyard, a few months ago he was having a conversation with a 'beautiful lady' in fact he was argueing with the beautiful lady telling her that she did NOT love him

he seems to have picked up on what my mum was thinking at times - specifically they were walking to a partiuclar house in an area of town he'd never been to before, as they turned the corner of that road he said 'there it is' and pointed at the house my mum was looking for

little things, like knowing what a pogo stick is when he saw a replica of an old fashioned one in a shop and trying to jump on it - don't think he would have come across these anywhere else, i can't think of any programme he would have watched that would have had them on

anyway, a few days ago he was swimming with my mum, arrived at the pool, noticed some different shaped floats and swimming aids in the water and said 'that one's shapped like a ouija board!', my mum said no it's not, and alexander reiteratted that it was shaped like an ouija board.

i didn't know what that shape is, not interested, neither are my parents - they had to google it to see what a board looked like, there is no way he could have been exposed to that word, let alone the traditional shape of one.

he is so matter of fact about it, he says these odd things in the most ordinary way, but i the ouija reference has made me feel very uncomfortable. why would a small child - he turned 3 last week - be referencing such things? what's the point of having these memories - i don't understand. do i just ignore them? i don't want to dismiss the things he says but i also don't want to encourage it because as ali rightly pointed out, he has to live in the now - which incidentally he does. he's the most sociable child i've ever encountered.

it got me thinking - his language development was ridiculously early, i'm friends with around a group of 25 mums whose children were all born within 2 months of each other, alexander being one of the youngest - and he was constructing sentences before most of the other kids were starting to talk - maybe he was remembering language skills rather than learning them.

sorry, i'm rambling and thinking out loud here - is he simply a very open child who is picking up on a variety of things, not necessarily past life memories?

[3D Sunset]

Hi Lorna,

You may want to join the discussions on Dual Activated Entities on the Harvest forum, it sounds like you may have one. If so, it's certainly nothing to worry about, indeed it's really a blessing.

Love and Light,

3D Sunset

[Lorna]

wow - how could i miss that thread?!

just read it - thank you 3D - going to nip back over and re-read

entities birthing these fourth-density entities experience a great feeling of, shall we say, the connection and the use of spiritual energies during pregnancy.
conscientiously are aware of those fourth-density understandings which third-density is unable to remember due to the forgetting

^^^ from these quotes the idea of dual activation seems a very good fit

[Phoenix]

I've felt really moved to answer this all of a sudden.

I think the most important thing is to allow him to radiate out that which is inside him. To the very minimum of judgement/ distortion.

For instance. A Ouija board is not actually a nefarious device in itself. No more than a telephone is. It's how they are used.

Although remember that your spiritual path is YOUR spiritual path. He is catalyst and such. But you have gifts that the radiance of his path should not overshine. I.e. No matter how smart he is you still live your own process.

I should like to meet him. I think any spontaneous communication between us can be quite revealing. And teaching on both ends. Where would the conversations lead?

However, that is just a spontaneous from a person you don't know. I am glad such a soul has incarnated and wish you all the best.

[Lorna]

I think the most important thing is to allow him to radiate out that which is inside him. To the very minimum of judgement/ distortion.

For instance. A Ouija board is not actually a nefarious device in itself. No more than a telephone is. It's how they are used.

thanks pheonix, i very much appreciate your reply, particularly the insightful statments above

i feel much more relaxed about it today, you're right it was the ouija reference that i was reacting too, and probably also reacting to my mum's reaction to it too.

there have been lots of other little moments that just make me smile

[fairyfarmgirl]

Lorna:

Congratulations on your crystal child (dual activated child) ... I have got three... LOL

--fairyfarmgirl