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    Bring4th Bring4th Community Olio I have a confession to make.

    Thread: I have a confession to make.


    Horuseus Away

    Fractal Infinite Self.
    Posts: 643
    Threads: 35
    Joined: Oct 2012
    #61
    08-15-2013, 06:45 AM (This post was last modified: 08-15-2013, 06:59 AM by Horuseus.)
    I've somewhat tended to stay on the sidelines as of late, observing the various dynamics and biases at play between interfacing members on this 'network/web/grid' of energy that is this forum. There are 'fronts' or 'persona masks' each of us don at various levels as a means of fronting information interchange through that which may be deemed 'desirable' to Other-Self, however arbitrary such a standard may suggest. One may use the dominant aspects fronted from this constructed persona to determine certain imbalances or insecurities harboured within the individual if maintained on a consistent basis. Pickle somewhat touched on this with his Chakra pressure analogy, which could be taken one step further in that a persona which excessively focusses on dominance (say) may in actuality feel quite insecure inside, leading towards a sort of new distorted equilibrium whereby a dominance aspect is touted in order to compensate for the internal feeling of insecurity.

    Now, I prefer not to speak of individuals without their presence, though I am fairly confident he is lurking; In any case I shall offer another perspective. What I see now of this particular individual, the apparent 'rapid' pace of his progression parallels much of a phase I went through a couple years ago, and indeed I have noted other members who have commented on the same in their own path. That being, when the Ego/personality construct is first confronted with a transcendent principle, and the popularized 'infinite creator' ideal which has been touted many a time (though get this, you have chosen to experience the idea of being finite within the infinite), coupled with initial green ray activation, can lead one to bypass/shortcut the lower grounding faculties and work 'directly' with that which is the higher vibrational aspects of reality. This work may or may not be legitimate, but it does not matter, as there's a pervasive 'anything goes in New Age!' mentality rampant, shunning the law of responsibility and the experience of process and effort that is reminiscent of 3rd Density Earth.

    What I am trying to say here is, and I won't mince words any longer, is that when the Ego gets jumped up and high on this 'woo I am an Infinite Creator and anything goes' ideology it tends to make a lot of shit up in the process with a 'Godhood ideal' until the circuitry re-stabilizes from new activations and is back in sync so that 'real' work can began, which would be grounding to allow for a proper foundation for higher work. There have been a few members here and there which have also hinted at this in various threads which I have noted.

    I do not mean to be facetious, but we are humbled by incarnating in this density. You are part of the Infinite, and through which have chosen the 'idea' of being finite. Adonai's thread here reminds me of a 'belief'/'imbalance' I harboured previously whereby I removed myself from the responsibility of being grounded and working upon the lower rays, and in retrospection was my way of keeping my head in the sand, removing the fact that on a certain level chose to incarnate on a plane with parameters defined as 'limiting'. Sure, I have my distortions and biases, as does anyone here; you look at this post close enough and maybe you'll spot them, and the proceeding internal thought processes which resumed upon reading the initial post reminded me of that.

    Whether I am from the 6th Density, the 9th Density, this confederation or council of that group is none of my business. Sure, it's nice to know, but it is all superficial fluff unless it is directly involved in advancing ones 'progression' or 'remembering' in this plane and indeed the planetary matrix and Social Collective/Hive Mind as a whole. I am here now and by god I will enjoy my time here. Sure, I may need to expend 'effort', and I may not be able to necessarily wipe my ass with thought or by manifesting a baby wipe along the required region through 'manipulation' of intelligent infinity, because 'I am an Infinite Creator and your imagination is truly your limit', but that is absolutely ok, as that is inherent beauty of this plane. Accept it and love it for what it is, and have fun doing it.
    [+] The following 11 members thanked thanked Horuseus for this post:11 members thanked Horuseus for this post
      • Jeremy, BrownEye, Spaced, vervex, caycegal, Bring4th_Austin, reeay, xise, Charles, spero, Wai
    Melissa

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    #62
    08-15-2013, 11:03 AM
    I've always enjoyed reading about your journey A1 and I admire your courage to simply express who you are. I don't really understand why many people here talk about 'he' vs 'we' though. It's all the same to me. Be well duder! BigSmile
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      • Ankh
    caycegal (Offline)

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    #63
    08-15-2013, 12:29 PM
    Horuseus' post makes a lot of sense to me. I spent many years reading and studying spiritual literature - anything I could get my hands on that resonated with me. Yet my personal life was frustrating and felt like a prison. I read Edgar Cayce's definition of "sin." It is as follows: "Sin is knowledge not applied." I knew somehow I was "sinning" according to this definition - I was hoping I could through knowledge and prayer alone, without involvement in the rough and tumble of the physical planes, without making hard decisions and taking personal responsibility for my decisions and actions, without ever hurting anyone's feelings or making anyone angry with me (although many people were angry with me for my passivity) advance to enlightenment. However, I finally "hit bottom" and started to get involved with others in a different way, take responsibility for my life and my actions. I put away my books, and read only as much as I could absorb and use at the present time. I continue to read and study. Now I know that the time I put into practicing meditation is more important than the time I spend reading about meditation. I guess I always knew that but was hoping I could somehow avoid the trouble of dealing with the world.

    My path involved divorce, learning to live alone, and finally (after some years of personal development) meeting a partner with whom I am compatible.

    Although like most people I have used some drugs, including Television, which is mostly a drug but can be used otherwise, I hope more and more to be able to "be" in this physical world, because that is where I am, and to pretend otherwise is another form of escapism. I have known for a long time that God is in the Now, and that is where we find God. "Knowing" with my monkey mind is one thing. "Knowing" in the sense of direct experience of God is another.
    [+] The following 4 members thanked thanked caycegal for this post:4 members thanked caycegal for this post
      • Lycen, Horuseus, xise, spero
    Adonai One (Offline)

    Married to The Universe in its Entirety
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    #64
    08-19-2013, 02:12 AM (This post was last modified: 08-19-2013, 02:29 AM by Adonai One.)
    I just needed a break. I will be around.

    Also, I love all of you. Thanks for all of the kind words.

    P.S. Vervex and I are in love. I will be moving to Canada this Winter.

    (08-11-2013, 10:38 PM)Parsons Wrote: I have identified with Ra for some time, even to the point where I thought it is likely I am of Ra, but I am not sure if I am of that Social Memory Complex at the moment. I don't think I will be truly sure if that's the case or if the density I am a wanderer of until my physical death, although I am open to knowing such information.

    You are of Ra.

    (08-12-2013, 01:33 PM)rie Wrote: ...the idealistic guy whos fascinated with Ayn Rand, the guy who's trying to be a unique individual and be his own authority in life.

    Oh lord Jesus.
    [+] The following 4 members thanked thanked Adonai One for this post:4 members thanked Adonai One for this post
      • vervex, Ankh, Spaced, Parsons
    Ankh (Offline)

    Tiniest portion of the Creator
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    #65
    08-19-2013, 02:33 AM
    (08-19-2013, 02:12 AM)Adonai One Wrote: Vervex and I are in love. I will be moving to Canada this Winter.

    Good luck, you two!

    And welcome back, brother! Heart
    [+] The following 2 members thanked thanked Ankh for this post:2 members thanked Ankh for this post
      • Adonai One, Lycen
    Adonai One (Offline)

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    #66
    08-19-2013, 02:35 AM
    (08-12-2013, 08:08 AM)BrownEye Wrote:
    (08-11-2013, 10:05 PM)Adonai One Wrote: We even have members (small minority) that are of the negative polarity and they are loved and supported just the same.

    Oh you mean Ra is still in duality?

    It's not seen as such. It's more like a test in unity.

      •
    reeay Away

    Account Closed
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    #67
    08-19-2013, 02:35 AM
    lol oh and Friedrich Nietzsche
    [+] The following 1 member thanked thanked reeay for this post:1 member thanked reeay for this post
      • Adonai One
    Adonai One (Offline)

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    #68
    08-19-2013, 02:35 AM (This post was last modified: 08-19-2013, 02:37 AM by Adonai One.)
    (08-19-2013, 02:33 AM)Ankh Wrote:
    (08-19-2013, 02:12 AM)Adonai One Wrote: Vervex and I are in love. I will be moving to Canada this Winter.

    Good luck, you two!

    And welcome back, brother! Heart

    I love you, Ankh. Thanks for always being so kind to me. Please feel free to email me or pm me anytime.

    This goes for everyone.

    (08-19-2013, 02:35 AM)rie Wrote: lol oh and Friedrich Nietzsche

    Yeppers. Thanks for getting to know me, Rie. I love you so very much. Smile
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      • Ankh, reeay
    Melissa

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    #69
    08-19-2013, 03:15 AM
    Oh, how beautiful, you're in love! I hope you grow old and wrinkly together.
    Best wishes to the both of you. Smile
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      • Adonai One, vervex, Ankh
    Sagittarius (Offline)

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    #70
    08-19-2013, 03:21 AM
    That's awesome you two met on here. Congrats. To think awhile ago you were frustrated with female partners hehe.
    [+] The following 2 members thanked thanked Sagittarius for this post:2 members thanked Sagittarius for this post
      • Adonai One, vervex
    Adonai One (Offline)

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    #71
    08-19-2013, 03:27 AM (This post was last modified: 08-19-2013, 03:42 AM by Adonai One.)
    I ask Ra for predictions a lot....

    When I first met Vervex, I asked Ra the probability of our friendship continuing. There was a less than 30% chance that it would continue due to fading interesting on my part for several reasons and contingencies.

    I defied that probability. I set an intention in a magical working on pen and paper that I would get to know and unite with this woman as far as I can.

    Less than two weeks after that working we confessed our love to each other and now we are going as far as discussing marriage before we even meet each other, which is just crazy.

    We now know our life history prior to this...

    We've quite literally known each other for eons... so in our context this all seems sensible to us. Haha. It seems we've been searching for each other as far back as our early youth. We are quite literally twin flames.
    [+] The following 3 members thanked thanked Adonai One for this post:3 members thanked Adonai One for this post
      • Sagittarius, vervex, Parsons
    Melissa

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    #72
    08-19-2013, 03:38 AM
    That's not crazy, that's love Wink Thanks for sharing, Adonai.
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      • Adonai One, vervex
    Aloysius

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    #73
    08-19-2013, 05:29 AM
    Welcome back brother Smile
    It hasn't been the same without you.
    Congrats too and you Vervex, there's nothing quite like harmonious soul notes BigSmile
    I'm sorry if I ever was arrogant/unpleasant/naysayerlike towards you, I know I have been. You've taught me (and I think a lot of others here) a lot of things about ourselves.
    Blessings
    Yours Truly
    Magister Ludi
    [+] The following 2 members thanked thanked for this post:2 members thanked for this post
      • Adonai One, vervex
    Hototo Away

    Account Closed
    Posts: 1,268
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    #74
    08-19-2013, 05:52 AM
    Shh, its my 3rd or 4th time back here, but dont tell no one, is a secret.
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      • Adonai One, Parsons
    Spaced (Offline)

    Dark Star
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    #75
    08-19-2013, 10:03 AM
    I hope you like living in Montreal Adonai, it's a great city!

    Much love to you brother, and best wishes for you and Vervex <3
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      • Adonai One, vervex
    Bring4th_Austin (Offline)

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    #76
    08-19-2013, 10:59 AM
    Welcome back Immanuel, your temporary departure brought lots of good catalyst to light.
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      • Adonai One
    Charles (Offline)

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    #77
    08-19-2013, 12:28 PM (This post was last modified: 08-19-2013, 01:18 PM by Bring4th_Austin.)
    I'm glad we'er not loosing you Adonai One.

    And I'm delighted you've found your new (ancient) love.

    Many Blessings


    Mod edit: fixed the server error
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      • Adonai One, vervex
    Unbound

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    #78
    08-19-2013, 05:18 PM
    Enjoy the journey. Smile
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      • Adonai One
    xise (Offline)

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    #79
    08-19-2013, 08:42 PM
    He's back!! Smile
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      • Adonai One, Ankh
    Adonai One (Offline)

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    #80
    08-23-2013, 06:47 PM (This post was last modified: 08-23-2013, 06:49 PM by Adonai One.)
    I made a statement in this thread about some members of Ra being negatively polarized. It seems that this is only possible while retaining Confederation membership due to the manner of infringement.

    For instance, they will conquer a totalitarian planet to free it... They will buttheads with other negative entities in the name of good intent. Regardless, polarity is still lost to the point of negativity. There's still a lot of mystery here. However, this has given me a clue to how this all works out.

    Quote:41.26 Ra: Our sixth-density work was also accelerated because of the harmony of our social memory complex so that we were able to set out as members of the Confederation to even more swiftly approach graduation to seventh density. Our harmony, however, has been a grievous source of naïveté as regards working with your planet. Is there a brief query before we leave this instrument?

      •
    Unbound

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    #81
    08-23-2013, 11:10 PM
    We all have our place and are imbued with many potentials. The universe is a strange place, too many loopholes imo.
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      • Adonai One
    Adonai One (Offline)

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    #82
    08-24-2013, 03:11 AM (This post was last modified: 08-24-2013, 03:14 AM by Adonai One.)
    Basically, it seems as a member of Ra you can do no wrong... If I tried to destroy Earth for instance (crazy example), they would of course try to prevent my plans but at the end of the day I would be loved just the same.

    There is a love here beyond measure, beyond words. And it is constantly used to soothe me in my insecurities in knowing every thought and experience of mine is spectated, enjoyed by the collective and infused into the collective.

    I am truly outstanded by this true unity, this true unconditional love.
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      • vervex, AnthroHeart
    anagogy Away

    ἀναγωγή
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    #83
    08-24-2013, 04:23 AM
    (08-24-2013, 03:11 AM)Adonai One Wrote: Basically, it seems as a member of Ra you can do no wrong... If I tried to destroy Earth for instance (crazy example), they would of course try to prevent my plans but at the end of the day I would be loved just the same.

    There is a love here beyond measure, beyond words. And it is constantly used to soothe me in my insecurities in knowing every thought and experience of mine is spectated, enjoyed by the collective and infused into the collective.

    I am truly outstanded by this true unity, this true unconditional love.

    Couldn't we extend this and simply say "as a individuation of the one infinite creator, you can do no wrong".

    The creator's love is unconditional. So even if you weren't part of the vibration that equals Ra, this would still be true. Not saying Ra isn't great, just saying everybody is great, regardless of membership in the Ra social memory complex. Smile
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      • Ankh, Adonai One, Spaced, vervex
    Adonai One (Offline)

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    #84
    08-24-2013, 04:34 AM (This post was last modified: 08-24-2013, 04:36 AM by Adonai One.)
    I speak only in the manner that I did because divorce is very common in budding and even mature social memory complexes.

    It is hard work maintaining these relationships with a great amount of harmony.

    Indeed everyone is great. However, realizing it in form and action is a feat of much effort. I just feel very grateful... thus I express it. I intend no exclusion.

      •
    caycegal (Offline)

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    #85
    08-24-2013, 08:39 AM
    Let me say as I have previously posted:

    Jesus had 2 rules (that I know about):

    1. Love God with all your heart (that's pretty vague and capable of lots of interpretation)

    2. Love your neighbor as yourself (that's pretty clear to me. It tells me only to treat others as I would like to be treated by them.)

    However, Jesus was teaching the way of STO. Why did he teach this way? Because practically speaking, it's the only way to progress for most of us. This last is my interpretation. Buddha taught something similar.

    I hear people on this forum playing around with the idea of going down the "negative" path. Blessings to you, my friends. I wish for you, what I wish for myself: Joy, Peace, Enthusiasm, Well-being, Love, Abundance, Appreciation, Unity, Bliss.

    One other comment: Those who are augmenting their journey with generous doses of various drugs might want to reconsider (although we all use some drugs - the very foods we eat act as drugs upon our systems. I am talking about deliberately using psychoactive drugs to induce higher states) and read what Ra said about this. Although drugs might give you a "holiday" from your personal reality, this is temporary and not to confused with actual progress on the path to awareness.

    However, if you are choosing an extended drug holiday, again I send you blessings, and hope you are really, really enjoying yourself on your holiday.

    Blessings and peace to you all, and thanks for being there, my friends. You all give me so much comfort, knowing that we share some perceptions and intentions, and that you're here to interact with.

      •
    michael430

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    #86
    08-24-2013, 11:47 AM
    [deleted]
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      • caycegal
    AnthroHeart (Offline)

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    #87
    08-24-2013, 11:54 AM
    (08-24-2013, 03:11 AM)Adonai One Wrote: Basically, it seems as a member of Ra you can do no wrong... If I tried to destroy Earth for instance (crazy example), they would of course try to prevent my plans but at the end of the day I would be loved just the same.

    There is a love here beyond measure, beyond words. And it is constantly used to soothe me in my insecurities in knowing every thought and experience of mine is spectated, enjoyed by the collective and infused into the collective.

    I am truly outstanded by this true unity, this true unconditional love.

    I resonate strongly as being a member of Ra, though veiled as I am. I believe my guardian angel to be one of their complex. My guardian angel is also my guide. One time I was about to make a big mistake that would have altered the course of my life, and I asked them if I should do it, and they told me "I wouldn't", which spared me much misery. It was at that time I thought I had already been harvested to 4D. Schizophrenia has some big delusions. Delusions of grandeur.

    Thanks for posting. I is good to know I am unconditionally loved by Ra. Of course I can't say for sure if I'm of them. It feels right, but I've had hard lessons in the past when working with them. It rocked my world.

      •
    michael430

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    #88
    08-24-2013, 11:57 AM
    [deleted]

      •
    AnthroHeart (Offline)

    Anthro at Heart
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    #89
    08-24-2013, 01:02 PM
    I'm able to explore my spirituality safer now that I'm on medication. For me, it helps. Keeps me grounded while I explore the infinite. I still am somewhat leery of trying to contact or channel Ra, because of all the protection you need. I've supposedly got bipolar, which is somewhat interesting. I've felt like a child, where everything was new, and exciting. And I've been down feeling like my best friend was going to attack me at night. The things I have hallucinated have been beautiful. I no longer hallucinate on my medication, but that's fine. Creator is grand to me. I can't even fathom the infinite. There is a song called "I can't take infinity" which has a part in the middle that I like. I agree with that. While here in 3D I can't take infinity. It really surprises me that anyone can. When I've tried seeking the infinite, I get negative greetings galore. So I stay in my safe little box. Or perhaps box is the wrong word. I like to be secure and safe. I ask my guardian angel to help keep me safe and secure. And every so often I'll get brave and ask them to align my chakras or help my energy field somehow. I sure hope after all is said and done that I've had made the right choice. And hope I have polarized enough.

    And most of all I hope the Ra material is true, that after this life we will walk the steps of light, and not have to repeat incarnations. I can't imagine going through another 25,000 years in 3D.

      •
    michael430

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    #90
    08-24-2013, 01:15 PM
    [deleted]

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