11-18-2010, 04:11 PM
When I was a child, probably 5 I was singing "this little light of mine", a song I was taught at the Christian Preschool I attended. What I remember most was the time I was singing this song in my parents bedroom. I remember my first vision being that of a light blindingly bright and golden then pulling back to see it is the mighty flame of a candle burning only it is an older-style holder with an hour glass like sheathing. Thinking of this bright light now moves me to joyful tears from somewhere deep within.
I was always able to make friends easily and remember noticing that it seamed people confided in me more-so than others. Being overly social in school as was challenging as my desk was often moved right next to the teachers in hopes that would deter my talking as well as the occasional mouthful of my own feet. I loved anything artistic, drawing and crafts especially. I remember repeatedly drawing a picture of the ocean at sunset with two palm trees bending toward the sun for my mother and making little heart shaped paper-pillows by stapling paper together and stuffing it with crinkled paper.
As time moved on and I grew older I had forgotten the song and the visions and doodles were replaced with ceramics and my time was filled with school, work, theatre, choir and the beginnings of the internet with my Windows 3.1 OS.
It was at 17 that I discovered something was missing in my life and I began seeking then. My first discovery was found close to home, Christianity. I was saved and baptized on 4/27/97. At the time, I couldn't have been happier about it. Underneath however, I was still struggling with the inner turmoil of self hatred that had been building.
My sharp wit and tongue are a gift of my fathers. He had a knack of saying exactly that thing that would kill a spirit, just to knock you down enough to still eagerly strive for the pats on the back. But I was always incredibly sensitive to even the slightest remarks and habitually internalized them. My mind was rampant with judgement, negativity, yet my heart was constantly battling it.
My new found faith had not swayed my decisions when or my heart when it came to boys and I found myself pregnant at 18. Luckily I was a little chubby to begin with, so it went unnoticed in my first trimester, which happened to be the final semester of high school. The father, proposed and when I declined my perceptions about life spiraled downward quickly.
I had decided I didn't want to get married because my parents had done so when they were pregnant with me and I was not going to marry for the wrong reasons, no matter how it would look. I was very adamant about this then. Needless to say, when the man proposes and the woman says no, he comes to certain conclusions. His personal baggage only added to the difficulty and we split, very painfully.
I went on to raise my son on my own, but luckily I was never truly alone. I had the loving support of my grandparents and parents, sisters and brothers. One boyfriend would help me to peal away the barriers of close mindedness that sometimes afflicts Christians and I began to learn about the Chakra System and Energy Work, even learning Reiki though having little intention past curiosity.
The biggest turn was the surprising death of my younger brother in 2006. I realized at that point that there was indeed something different about me.
Of course, I cried and was upset about the event, I loved my brother very much. But at the same time, I was filled with power. The power I would need to help my father and mother and grandparents and my younger siblings. I was able to get through my own grief and come to peace with his passing rather quickly. One thing was for certain though. I wouldn't be raising my son in Vegas, where I had grown up.
Where I had witnessed the steady decline of my brother and step-sister as they fell deeper and deeper into drug addiction. Finally they both found heroin and from there their paths would split. One would overdose on Methadone while in recovery and the other would become homeless and destitute, both under the age of 25.
My mom had moved to Hawaii in 2002, and asked if we would like to move out here. It was an easy decision. I would not let what had happen to my brother happen to my son.
I also felt like I was being called to Hawaii and not only by my mom. There was an overwhelming feeling that my time in Vegas was over. That the book was closing and a new chapter was to begin. Little did I know it would lead me to my true self.
I was always a crappy poet writing obscure and as abstractly as possible. Almost like talking in code. But I knew the deeper meanings, and despite my almost obsessive need to communicate, these meanings I would keep locked away for myself alone almost like a test of others. For if they could glean the deeper meanings of these poems, perhaps they would see right into me.
I had little interest in UFO or Aliens of any kind when I found the Law of One. I had just moved to Hawaii, gotten a job as doing payroll for a Country Club and was settling in to my new life, island style. I had been watching the History Channel when they gave mention to Edgar Cayce, "The Sleeping Prophet". I had never heard of him before so something beckoned me to find out a little more about him. Within a few clicks, Was learning about something called the Ra Material. Once I had decided to read it, everything changed.
I spent three months reading all 5 books. Some parts I had to read many times over but I resonated with the information. This began a transformation in me. I was voracious for information on many new subjects. I wanted to know and understand. Then after a year I was ready to teach. Spiritually I found a student in a 50 year old man, professionally I became a computer teacher and found students from kindergarten through senior citizen. Another year of working at a school learning how to create curriculum, I found myself laid off but feeling like I had graduated. No worry or despair, it was like a celebration,I have never been happier.
Today, my son is about to turn 12, my little baby is as tall as I am. My journey has taken me on many adventures, but I feel like this is only the beginning. Now 30, I am certain about few things in my life, the Law of One is one of them. My soul has been around for a very long time indeed and it has come for a very specific purpose. I am currently waist deep, working on a body of material based on the information given by Ra to assist other seekers like myself.
I was only 2 years old when Carla and Don and Jim were working so diligently on gathering this material that would change my life forever. I know that I am connected to them and each reader and each being. They are me and I am them. I share my story with you not because I need to but because it is my path and journey in this life back to my light. I would have found it without the book, I have no doubt, but because of it I have gotten farther more rapidly. I am eternally grateful.
I have nothing but love for all of you, my brothers and sisters of light.
Let it SHINE!!!!
Love,
Brandy Pappas
I was always able to make friends easily and remember noticing that it seamed people confided in me more-so than others. Being overly social in school as was challenging as my desk was often moved right next to the teachers in hopes that would deter my talking as well as the occasional mouthful of my own feet. I loved anything artistic, drawing and crafts especially. I remember repeatedly drawing a picture of the ocean at sunset with two palm trees bending toward the sun for my mother and making little heart shaped paper-pillows by stapling paper together and stuffing it with crinkled paper.
As time moved on and I grew older I had forgotten the song and the visions and doodles were replaced with ceramics and my time was filled with school, work, theatre, choir and the beginnings of the internet with my Windows 3.1 OS.
It was at 17 that I discovered something was missing in my life and I began seeking then. My first discovery was found close to home, Christianity. I was saved and baptized on 4/27/97. At the time, I couldn't have been happier about it. Underneath however, I was still struggling with the inner turmoil of self hatred that had been building.
My sharp wit and tongue are a gift of my fathers. He had a knack of saying exactly that thing that would kill a spirit, just to knock you down enough to still eagerly strive for the pats on the back. But I was always incredibly sensitive to even the slightest remarks and habitually internalized them. My mind was rampant with judgement, negativity, yet my heart was constantly battling it.
My new found faith had not swayed my decisions when or my heart when it came to boys and I found myself pregnant at 18. Luckily I was a little chubby to begin with, so it went unnoticed in my first trimester, which happened to be the final semester of high school. The father, proposed and when I declined my perceptions about life spiraled downward quickly.
I had decided I didn't want to get married because my parents had done so when they were pregnant with me and I was not going to marry for the wrong reasons, no matter how it would look. I was very adamant about this then. Needless to say, when the man proposes and the woman says no, he comes to certain conclusions. His personal baggage only added to the difficulty and we split, very painfully.
I went on to raise my son on my own, but luckily I was never truly alone. I had the loving support of my grandparents and parents, sisters and brothers. One boyfriend would help me to peal away the barriers of close mindedness that sometimes afflicts Christians and I began to learn about the Chakra System and Energy Work, even learning Reiki though having little intention past curiosity.
The biggest turn was the surprising death of my younger brother in 2006. I realized at that point that there was indeed something different about me.
Of course, I cried and was upset about the event, I loved my brother very much. But at the same time, I was filled with power. The power I would need to help my father and mother and grandparents and my younger siblings. I was able to get through my own grief and come to peace with his passing rather quickly. One thing was for certain though. I wouldn't be raising my son in Vegas, where I had grown up.
Where I had witnessed the steady decline of my brother and step-sister as they fell deeper and deeper into drug addiction. Finally they both found heroin and from there their paths would split. One would overdose on Methadone while in recovery and the other would become homeless and destitute, both under the age of 25.
My mom had moved to Hawaii in 2002, and asked if we would like to move out here. It was an easy decision. I would not let what had happen to my brother happen to my son.
I also felt like I was being called to Hawaii and not only by my mom. There was an overwhelming feeling that my time in Vegas was over. That the book was closing and a new chapter was to begin. Little did I know it would lead me to my true self.
I was always a crappy poet writing obscure and as abstractly as possible. Almost like talking in code. But I knew the deeper meanings, and despite my almost obsessive need to communicate, these meanings I would keep locked away for myself alone almost like a test of others. For if they could glean the deeper meanings of these poems, perhaps they would see right into me.
I had little interest in UFO or Aliens of any kind when I found the Law of One. I had just moved to Hawaii, gotten a job as doing payroll for a Country Club and was settling in to my new life, island style. I had been watching the History Channel when they gave mention to Edgar Cayce, "The Sleeping Prophet". I had never heard of him before so something beckoned me to find out a little more about him. Within a few clicks, Was learning about something called the Ra Material. Once I had decided to read it, everything changed.
I spent three months reading all 5 books. Some parts I had to read many times over but I resonated with the information. This began a transformation in me. I was voracious for information on many new subjects. I wanted to know and understand. Then after a year I was ready to teach. Spiritually I found a student in a 50 year old man, professionally I became a computer teacher and found students from kindergarten through senior citizen. Another year of working at a school learning how to create curriculum, I found myself laid off but feeling like I had graduated. No worry or despair, it was like a celebration,I have never been happier.
Today, my son is about to turn 12, my little baby is as tall as I am. My journey has taken me on many adventures, but I feel like this is only the beginning. Now 30, I am certain about few things in my life, the Law of One is one of them. My soul has been around for a very long time indeed and it has come for a very specific purpose. I am currently waist deep, working on a body of material based on the information given by Ra to assist other seekers like myself.
I was only 2 years old when Carla and Don and Jim were working so diligently on gathering this material that would change my life forever. I know that I am connected to them and each reader and each being. They are me and I am them. I share my story with you not because I need to but because it is my path and journey in this life back to my light. I would have found it without the book, I have no doubt, but because of it I have gotten farther more rapidly. I am eternally grateful.
I have nothing but love for all of you, my brothers and sisters of light.
Let it SHINE!!!!
Love,
Brandy Pappas
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