Balancing and processing repulsion

[johnken]

I know his will sound like a very weird post, but I believe confronting the things I experience the most repulsion towards the most is a necessary evil. And it is a mean to become more balanced in less positive situations.

How would you go about balancing, processing, integrating things that triggers immense amount of repulsion within?

I wish to heal and balance the seperation it creates and the negative emotions that gets triggered. It seems simultaneously impossible and also absolutely necessary.

I believe most humans and animals will experience that at some point. It is a physical reaction that the body does when reacting to to things that are experienced in an excessively negative way.

For exemple certain foods cannot enter my mouth without me puking instantly. Sometimes the feeling of disgust is so intense that I'm almost about to puke even if the food has not yet entered my mouth yet, just the scent is enough to feel completely grossed out. I have been like that ever since I'm born and it is most likely very normal for certain kind of things. I was a very difficult child growing up. Now I recognize this pattern as having an energical connection with other things.

Another exemple is hearing pop music. Some people would just think it's either good or bad. I cannot hear it without feeling headaches, being dizzy and honestly the feeling I have when hearing it feels like I'm being raped by the bass and numbing repetitions. I am simply put unable to function socially around it. And even more so emotionally.

Sometimes people who display strong amount of anger in social situations can also trigger this feeling even though I can contain myself and understand why they do it, I'm still left with a feeling of disgust about the emotions that have spread within.

I understand that I most likely have a difficult time processing certain emotions but I don't know how to go about processing them. I'm not even sure what they are. It seems it triggers the most animalistic part of the brain. It's almost like asking someone getting raped to find the compassion for how they feel in the moment while it's happening, yet it's not so litteral. It's hard to actually do in the moment and it's not very rational. I can't see myself just stuffing my mouth with fish and tomatoes until my body stops reacting or have myself an intense blitz of pop music just so I become emotionally numb or just get as much people angry until their anger doesn't reach me anymore.

Is there a more delicate way to find these things within and integrate them so they stop activating a physical response? It most likely can become a framework for facing anything that one is experiencing negatively if extrapolated.

[flofrog]

Greetings johnken and welcome to this place

About your reaction to pop music, which made me smile, you might like to have a look at 1973 book titled “the secret life of plants” . The book was written by Peter Tompkins who collected an amazing amount of research done on plants. For exemple, a plant owned for several years by the same owner, would be plugged to a detector creating a diagram of its reactions for a whole day, while it’s owner would go to work. At one moment, the owner did  step down from a sidewalk without looking, nearly getting knocked over by a car coming, and the plant reacted in a violent way on the diagram.

About music, several plants would try to bend further away from the speaker flowing such music as very strong hectic pop or metal, but would react favorably towards classical, and after listening for two days  to classical music from India were described as twirling themselves around the speaker...  I always thought this so extraordinary and so hilarious at the same time...

[katherine hamilton]

Hi Johnken
Flo frog gave you some really good info on the vibrations that plants give off. I love my plants in my home and can honestly say there very sensitive towards what can go on in there environment. I am lucky in the aspects that iam able to communicate with all natures consciousness. And plant definitely thrive when you communicate with them, especially if you sing they love it.
But going back to your difficulties you expressed. There may be a number different factors, but I would say have you tried to go into meditation and see how your physical, mental and emotional bodys are feelin? probably the best way to start is, if your a visual person great but no need to worry if not find your own way ,find a good balancing chakra meditation on you tube to begin with and work with that until your own intuition starts to kick in. The more you focus on your self needs then this may help to get the answers your looking for. The more you seek the more you shall find. Alternatively finding a healer you could go to may also be able to help And give you some good advice
With love and light

[RitaJC]

I know his will sound like a very weird post, but I believe confronting the things I experience the most repulsion towards the most is a necessary evil. And it is a mean to become more balanced in less positive situations.

How would you go about balancing, processing, integrating things that triggers immense amount of repulsion within?

I wish to heal and balance the seperation it creates and the negative emotions that gets triggered. It seems simultaneously impossible and also absolutely necessary.

I believe most humans and animals will experience that at some point. It is a physical reaction that the body does when reacting to to things that are experienced in an excessively negative way.

For exemple certain foods cannot enter my mouth without me puking instantly. Sometimes the feeling of disgust is so intense that I'm almost about to puke even if the food has not yet entered my mouth yet, just the scent is enough to feel completely grossed out. I have been like that ever since I'm born and it is most likely very normal for certain kind of things. I was a very difficult child growing up. Now I recognize this pattern as having an energical connection with other things.

Another exemple is hearing pop music. Some people would just think it's either good or bad. I cannot hear it without feeling headaches, being dizzy and honestly the feeling I have when hearing it feels like I'm being raped by the bass and numbing repetitions. I am simply put unable to function socially around it. And even more so emotionally.

Sometimes people who display strong amount of anger in social situations can also trigger this feeling even though I can contain myself and understand why they do it, I'm still left with a feeling of disgust about the emotions that have spread within.

I understand that I most likely have a difficult time processing certain emotions but I don't know how to go about processing them. I'm not even sure what they are. It seems it triggers the most animalistic part of the brain. It's almost like asking someone getting raped to find the compassion for how they feel in the moment while it's happening, yet it's not so litteral. It's hard to actually do in the moment and it's not very rational. I can't see myself just stuffing my mouth with fish and tomatoes until my body stops reacting or have myself an intense blitz of pop music just so I become emotionally numb or just get as much people angry until their anger doesn't reach me anymore.

Is there a more delicate way to find these things within and integrate them so they stop activating a physical response? It most likely can become a framework for facing anything that one is experiencing negatively if extrapolated.

What you describe seems to me reactions of a very energetically sensitive body that gives strong signals about energies that are incompatible with it. I don't believe there's anything wrong with that.

I'd appreciate and listen, not try to somehow "balance" it and expose it to those energies (food, music, people etc.). You as a consciousness are still in the non-dual place of loving and accepting everything as it is (the Creator). But that doesn't mean that you have to expose the mind/body complex to everything in this 3D buffet. Loving everything as the Creator is absolutely compatible with not clashing incompatible energies and not torturing entities, including your own mind/body complex.