12-05-2011, 02:36 AM
Hi-so I accidentally found the matireal from the book of Ra while continuously searching for spiritual stuff on the internet. I have had this yearning in my heart since I was a kid for service and compassion towards others. My first memory was me as a kid watching the missionaries in Africa showing the starving kids on TV pledging for money and me feeling helpless but not wanting to turn the channel because I felt like I would be "ignoring" them. I was super senative as a kid-still am. I had vivid dreams from around the age age of 6yrs. to current. They were most intense from 6yrs to 14yrs.-they were so overwhelming they interferred with my waking life and I went to a dream therapist. She help me to have better control in my dreams (Carlos Castaneda style?/) I also suffered with trichotillamania from age 10 to age 30/I always felt that this was a spiritual issue rather than an emotional/behavorial/OCD issue that it is mostly labeled as. I am now at a point in my life that I feel like a stranger in this world but feel so at peace at the same time because I know I choose to be here to help others feel the same peace that I feel. I of course feel lonely and out of place at times but have a inner confidience and unwavering optimism that all while turn out for the best (for me and everyone in this world at this time). I do feel conflicted on me being a leader or that someone should follow my words-I feel like sometimes I want to shout from my rooftop (Is that how you say it?) but at the same time I know that humbleness and humility is more my style. Just wanted to share-never have given up my info. like that but know from experience that sharing your story can cause others great "sparks" in helping along the journey-
Peace-Caro/
Peace-Caro/
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