Episode #61

[Bring4th_Austin]

Episode #61



In this episode, we discuss:
- The dynamic between discipline and acceptance of the self.

---

A transcript for this episode will be posted once it is available.

Feel free to discuss this episode in this thread!

[rva_jeremy]

Is it just me or have we had like three episodes drop within the span of a week? Good job guys!

[rva_jeremy]

Also, wanted to share something I read in Pema Chödrön's When Things Fall Apart that I thought described a very compassionate approach to discipline. It's actually very similar to the way you all discussed it!

Complete discipline means that at every opportunity, we're willing to come back, just gently come back to the present moment.

This strikes me as hardly describing an exercise in controlling the self harshly. Instead, discipline means simply not giving up on the flawed, confused, striving self as it pursues its goal.

Thanks again for discussing my question!

[Cainite]

I just started listening to these treasures!

You have my thanks!

[rva_jeremy]

I'm really, really resonating with what you all are saying. This attitude of friendliness towards the self seems to be the key to discipline. I like how Austin describes sitting with urges and impulses instead of simply reacting to them. Truly paying attention to the urge or impulse will help you understand and face whatever it is behind the urge or impulse, and it's a "baby step" towards saying no by asking the self "what is it exactly I'm saying no to?"

[Bring4th_Austin]

Is it just me or have we had like three episodes drop within the span of a week?  Good job guys!

I slipped up and missed a publishing day, so it was published weekly for the past 3 weeks, and then slipped up again and forgot to post one on Bring4th, so posted two threads in one day last week. We should be back to a somewhat normal schedule (though Homecoming is bound to interrupt it probably).

Also, wanted to share something I read in Pema Chödrön's When Things Fall Apart that I thought described a very compassionate approach to discipline.  It's actually very similar to the way you all discussed it!

Complete discipline means that at every opportunity, we're willing to come back, just gently come back to the present moment.

This strikes me as hardly describing an exercise in controlling the self harshly.  Instead, discipline means simply not giving up on the flawed, confused, striving self as it pursues its goal.

Thanks again for discussing my question!

It reminds me of something I heard to help in mindfulness meditation. When we find ourselves carried away by our thoughts instead of simply witnessing them, as mindfulness calls for, a very simple way to guide ourselves back is to ask the question, "Avoiding?"

Not necessarily to explore the answer to the question, the single-word question is a gentle guidance that really helps to soothe the self and allow our awareness to remain centered in the state of mindfulness. It's not a command, it's not forceful, it more serves as a gentle suggestion.

[rva_jeremy]

It reminds me of something I heard to help in mindfulness meditation. When we find ourselves carried away by our thoughts instead of simply witnessing them, as mindfulness calls for, a very simple way to guide ourselves back is to ask the question, "Avoiding?"

Not necessarily to explore the answer to the question, the single-word question is a gentle guidance that really helps to soothe the self and allow our awareness to remain centered in the state of mindfulness. It's not a command, it's not forceful, it more serves as a gentle suggestion.

That's an intriguing way to handle the wandering mind.  Chödrön talks about the technique she uses of labelling.  Anytime you catch your mind wandering, you just say "thinking" and come back to stillness.  I'm wondering if there's any difference between a question that suggests and a label that judges.  While the former seems a bit gentler, it also seems to imply the need for a response.  The latter strikes me as a bit more emphatic, but she also talks about how one of her students says "thinking, good buddy" in order to soften the discipline and practice that unconditional friendliness towards the self.

I'll try the "avoiding?" method tomorrow.

[rva_jeremy]

By the way I dug up this old Hatonn passage on discipline that I thought at the time was really profound:

That which distracts is always a detail, that which calls you back to remembrance is always discipline.

Q'uo, April 6, 2003

It definitely recapitulates other quotes and techniques we described above!

[Ankh]

Hey guys,

Thank you for another great episode!

I guess that in the end it is about the will of seeking the Creator within vs distortions of free will beating up the illusion-bound incarnate self. And as one moves on with the light of awareness and gaining more and more knowledge of the self, accepting the self, hopefully the will of seeking the will of the Creator within gains more and more ground within the self. That is the true and only battle I believe. The battle of those wills within the self.

I never was a person who could control myself with iron will. My ex-husband could though. If he set his mind on something, no matter what he felt inside, he could carry it through. And though I admired that trait within him, wondering how he could do these things and just through iron will disregard inner discomfort, I knew that *I* was not like that. One of the greatest things given by Ra (through Don, Carla and Jim) is what to do instead of *controlling* the self with force. As it was mentioned in this show, it is not part of our society to show compassion and understanding for the self when it comes to negative aspects of the self. Instead we are expected to control these traits with force. I never resonated with that and knew that I could not do this after I tried it. I felt that the "result" by using this force, i.e. a more desired or "better" behavior perhaps, was not worth it. I felt like I raped myself when doing this. But now we know what to do instead and how to go about it, when we want to manifest a more desired attitude.

[rva_jeremy]

For what it's worth, Lana, Charles Eisenstein's book "The More Beautiful World Our Hearts Know Is Possible" talks about this use of "iron will" a lot, how we apply the same force to ourselves through guilt, lack of compassion, and strain that the society applies to the people and the planet. He points towards a way of being able to act and execute on one's desires that, instead of being something that you force out of yourself, arises naturally through simply knowing, appreciating, and having compassion for yourself.