confusing relationships

[Raz]

I feel that when we start to think we know a person in our life, there is a tendency in our current frame of mind to have a deeper focus on the relationship with our thoughts about a person rather than the being itself. everything is touching everything; we are all in fact, in a very intimate fundamental relationship regardless of what we think of one and another. So there is a sense of disconnection when we substitute our projections with the people in our life. We no longer feel the flow of them; we statically know them. Regardless if we think we know them in a positive or negative way it turns the focus of our relationship with them to the fabricated memory of experience with them. Yes there is a level of practicality in knowing what patterns someone is prone to lead. But it is not on the level of practicality that we really feel connected to each other...

[Night Owl]

You think you know someone until you realize you really don't! People change, people adapt. People act based on their current awareness which constantly grows. All that is certain is that everyone evolves but how they evolve is not something you can predict. You can't even predict it for yourself. What is it that's causing your confusion?

[APeacefulWarrior]

I'm honestly worried about how disconnected so many people (especially in Western society) are becoming, in terms of actual face-to-face relationships with other people. As you say, it seems like more and more folks are seeing people solely in terms of labels/achetypes rather than treating that person as an individual entity.

Making this worse, of course, is there appear to be a lot of people who strive for 2-Dimensionality and WANT to become the embodiment of a label or archetype. And\or change that label's meaning to suit them specifically. Just look at all the guys who want to be Barney Stinson.

I think this has largely been driven by electronic media. (Says the Marshall McLuhan fan...) TV and the Internet bring people far more "knowledge" about other people than face-to-face interactions, at least in most cases. The problem, of course, is that TV and the Internet LOVE to reduce things to matters of Label vs Label. More or less, a lot of people simply don't get out enough to learn that real people in the real world often don't behave like people onscreen.

Even those who wish they could.

My hope is that technology may eventually solve this problem for itself, since the trends are constantly towards smaller and more portable devices. In, say, ten years when everyone has Internet-connected AR goggles and doesn't need to stay cooped up in a room all day, there's probably going to be a lot more public social interaction going on.

[APeacefulWarrior]

Also, I'm totally reminded of this scene from "Network," which is the speech everyone should know from that movie, rather than the "I'm mad as hell" bit. It's scary how true it still sounds, even a full generation later. (Then again, Network is probably one of the most prophetic films ever made, sadly enough.)



"You're beginning to believe this tube is reality and your own lives are unreal!" That line really gets to me.

[VanAlioSaldo]

I'm honestly worried about how disconnected so many people (especially in Western society) are becoming, in terms of actual face-to-face relationships with other people.  As you say, it seems like more and more folks are seeing people solely in terms of labels/achetypes rather than treating that person as an individual entity.  

Making this worse, of course, is there appear to be a lot of people who strive for 2-Dimensionality and WANT to become the embodiment of a label or archetype.  And\or change that label's meaning to suit them specifically.  Just look at all the guys who want to be Barney Stinson.

I think this has largely been driven by electronic media. (Says the Marshall McLuhan fan...)  TV and the Internet bring people far more "knowledge" about other people than face-to-face interactions, at least in most cases.  The problem, of course, is that TV and the Internet LOVE to reduce things to matters of Label vs Label.  More or less, a lot of people simply don't get out enough to learn that real people in the real world often don't behave like people onscreen.

Even those who wish they could.

My hope is that technology may eventually solve this problem for itself, since the trends are constantly towards smaller and more portable devices.  In, say, ten years when everyone has Internet-connected AR goggles and doesn't need to stay cooped up in a room all day, there's probably going to be a lot more public social interaction going on.

I can assure you... I do not want internet on my glasses. It would make me lay in bed lazy never needing to get up except to eat and work and use the bathroom amd clean. Beyond that its not as useful as you'd think. Laziness is also to blame. ButOtherwise yes, the media and society over here is horrifying to me..

OP, I never understood why we can't just enjoy people for who they are. Relationship is a label that ruins relationships as well. Can we call it just Being with another?

[APeacefulWarrior]

I can assure you...  I do not want internet on my glasses.  It would make me lay in bed lazy never needing to get up except to eat and work and use the bathroom amd clean.  Beyond that its not as useful as you'd think.  Laziness is also to blame.  ButOtherwise yes, the media and society over here is horrifying to me..

Heh, well, call this my little bit of prognostication. It's still some years away from being commonplace\affordable, but perpetually-connected AR devices are almost certainly going to be the Next Revolution in media and personal electronics.

A few years back, I saw articles about a prototype Glass app called "JewGlass," which was basically a compilation of everything a Jew might want to do in New York City. It could call up reviews of every Kosher deli in the Five Boroughs. It could give street-walking directions to any Synagogue. It had a complete MTA schedules (and delays), which could be integrated into a calendar which could literally tell you when it's time to start walking to the subway station to reach an appointment on-time. Plus onboard email and cell calling and soforth, mostly triggered with quiet voice commands. And nearly all this was done in pop-ups in the peripheral vision, specifically so it wouldn't prevent someone from engaging with other people. Or wandering into traffic.

Expand that to cover all services in NYC rather than just Jewish ones, and there's pretty much no reason a person in the area would ever need to sit down in front of a computer, or even pull out a handheld device. At least not beyond watching movies or playing games. The electronic experience would simply be integrated into their day-to-day lives, without interrupting their awareness of real life around them, plus leaving their hands totally free. That's going to be a paradigm-changer.

Now, I see some challenges AR will also create, but I do honestly think it's going to do a lot to get rid of the shut-in problem.

[VanAlioSaldo]

As i said, living here, it won't fix the problem caused by laziness. It sounds great in concept. In execution, imagine All the ways itll be misused for not just little things but crimes first and foremost.

Its a changer, but you truly can't teach an old dog new tricks if it doesn't want to learn them. Laziness and indifference may be made no better Just as much as it might end.

I wish wed look away at advancing technology and pay more attention to the science of emotional frequency and energy rather than keep on making smaller faster better computers, can we work on ourselves before we give ourselves such tools...?